Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Jul 28, 2014, 09:16 AM
OutlawedSpirit's Avatar
OutlawedSpirit OutlawedSpirit is offline
Veteran Member
 
Member Since: Aug 2012
Location: Among the corn in Illinois
Posts: 595
I'm having a lot of thoughts of SI right now, just because this mania has become so physically uncomfortable. I want to crawl out of my skin, I want to flay it off, it's too uncomfortable to wear anymore.

My thoughts are racing still, and they seem to just be getting dark. I feel like I'm losing this battle with my illness, I feel like I'm losing my will to fight. Part of me wants to just give up and let it take over.

I don't feel invincible anymore, I feel incredibly vulnerable instead. I want someone to hold me and tell me it will be alright, and then I want to shove them off of me and scream!

I don't even know what I want. My wife asked me last night what she could do for me and I told her I have no idea. I really don't.
__________________
"Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten" - G.K. Chesterton
Dx-
Bipolar Disorder I
PTSD
OCD

Meds-
I am currently Med Free

Hugs from:
Anonymous45023, wildflowerchild25

advertisement
  #2  
Old Jul 28, 2014, 09:50 AM
gayleggg's Avatar
gayleggg gayleggg is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
 
Member Since: Apr 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 26,619
OutlawedSpirit, I'm sorry you are having such a tough time, but I can relate to all you said. I'm kind of in the same spot. My insides are simmering and threatening to over flow. Of course, I'm at work and can't let out the feelings or there will be trouble.

I feel vulnerale too. I'm glad you have your wife to give you hugs. I hope you get to feeling better soon.
__________________
Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin

"Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha
  #3  
Old Jul 28, 2014, 03:28 PM
~Christina's Avatar
~Christina ~Christina is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
 
Member Since: Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
Have you called your Pdoc back? .. since the slight increase you were given hasnt helped

I feel very bad for you .. feeling that way is so terrible.
__________________
Helping others gets me out of my own head ~
  #4  
Old Jul 28, 2014, 03:30 PM
OutlawedSpirit's Avatar
OutlawedSpirit OutlawedSpirit is offline
Veteran Member
 
Member Since: Aug 2012
Location: Among the corn in Illinois
Posts: 595
I have an appointment tonight. In 3 hours as a matter if fact but it still seems so far away
__________________
"Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten" - G.K. Chesterton
Dx-
Bipolar Disorder I
PTSD
OCD

Meds-
I am currently Med Free

  #5  
Old Jul 28, 2014, 03:34 PM
~Christina's Avatar
~Christina ~Christina is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
 
Member Since: Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
YAY ! I am glad you have an appt .. Best Pdocs sees you dealing with this in real life.
__________________
Helping others gets me out of my own head ~
  #6  
Old Jul 28, 2014, 08:32 PM
OutlawedSpirit's Avatar
OutlawedSpirit OutlawedSpirit is offline
Veteran Member
 
Member Since: Aug 2012
Location: Among the corn in Illinois
Posts: 595
Well pdoc has sent me to the ER for a psych eval. This is turning out to be just a great night.
__________________
"Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten" - G.K. Chesterton
Dx-
Bipolar Disorder I
PTSD
OCD

Meds-
I am currently Med Free

  #7  
Old Jul 30, 2014, 09:43 PM
Tucson's Avatar
Tucson Tucson is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: Tucson, AZ
Posts: 3,105
Quote:
Originally Posted by OutlawedSpirit View Post
Well pdoc has sent me to the ER for a psych eval. This is turning out to be just a great night.
How did the eval work out?
__________________
Dx: Bipolar I, ADD, GAD. Rx: Fluoxetine, Buproprion, Olanzapine, Lamictal, and Strattera.
  #8  
Old Jul 30, 2014, 09:55 PM
Love&Toil's Avatar
Love&Toil Love&Toil is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,011
Yes, how are you doing now?
__________________
Bipolar II / GAD / SAD / PMDD
------------
Prozac 30mg, Wellbutrin 150mg, Latuda 40mg
  #9  
Old Jul 30, 2014, 09:55 PM
jazzbella18 jazzbella18 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: Illinois
Posts: 33
Sorry to say this but maybe it is not a bad thing to have to go to the ER because I know when I get in those sort of moods I cannot make the right decisions and I am now a harm to myself. I hope it all works out for you and that you are safe. Best Wishes.
  #10  
Old Jul 31, 2014, 06:41 AM
OutlawedSpirit's Avatar
OutlawedSpirit OutlawedSpirit is offline
Veteran Member
 
Member Since: Aug 2012
Location: Among the corn in Illinois
Posts: 595
The eval went ok. I started a partial hospitalization program yesterday. I see the pdoc today so hopefully they aren't like my regular pdoc and just say idk what to do.
__________________
"Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten" - G.K. Chesterton
Dx-
Bipolar Disorder I
PTSD
OCD

Meds-
I am currently Med Free

Reply
Views: 574

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 09:46 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.