[Freakout]

Hello Psych Central.

A little history about me. I was diagnosed in 2010 with one pdoc stating I was Bipolar and the other opining that Borderline Personality Disorder was a more appropriate diagnosis. I feel I have aspects of each.

My early history involved a number of very traumatic separations and placement in foster care and subsequent adoption. I have just completed 4 (yes 4) years of psychodynamic psychotherapy which I feel has been helpful. I have previously taken meds but am now trying an alternative approach to achieve more stability.

After reading my report the pdoc has written how I am trying to achieve a "blissful fusional" state which he rightly opines is an attempt at a reunion early state with my natural mother. This is then followed by depression when it is not achieved and has also meant I have engaged in quite extensive religious practice to attempt to reach this state.

Does this seem familiar to many of you or do you not interpret it in this way?

If you google "blissful fusional and manic depression" there is quite a bit of info on this theme.

Thanks for listening.

FZ

[TheatreKid]

I tried googling that phrase because I don't quite understand what you're saying and would like to, but no results come up.

[kaliope]

hi freakout
I tried googling blissful fusional state and all that came up was your post. bipolar and bpd are often confused so it would be well to find a good pdoc to get a correct diagnosis. I worked for many years, attempting almost every way possible to manage a stable life without meds for my bipolar and finally had to resort to meds. after finally finding the combo that worked, I can say I will never go off of them. I am tired of that roller coaster. welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome

[Freakout]

Hello,

Unfortunatey being a new poster I cannot submit links yet. The best explanation refers to Virginia Wolf and her manic depressive illness along with the work of Melanie Klein. It is on page 1 if you Google that. It just seems to reinforce a view I have had after a lifetime of living with my condition about what put me in those heavenly blissful states regardless of diagnosis.

This view is also shared by the likes of primal therapy etc. I suppose when you have lived with something that long you want explanations as to what is happening. There is also the genes vs environment argument also I guess which comes into play with others having differing genetic predisposition to BP but I do find the analysis interesting.

[StayinAlive]

Originally Posted by Freakout

Hello,

Unfortunatey being a new poster I cannot submit links yet. The best explanation refers to Virginia Wolf and her manic depressive illness along with the work of Melanie Klein. It is on page 1 if you Google that. It just seems to reinforce a view I have had after a lifetime of living with my condition about what put me in those heavenly blissful states regardless of diagnosis.

This view is also shared by the likes of primal therapy etc. I suppose when you have lived with something that long you want explanations as to what is happening. There is also the genes vs environment argument also I guess which comes into play with others having differing genetic predisposition to BP but I do find the analysis interesting.

I did find the book excerpt about Virginia Woolf.

Hope this helps.

[Crazy Hitch]

Hi. I've had a Bipolar diagnosis for a few years now. My triage team have referred me to a Spectrum intake clinic this Friday for a comprehensive assessment for borderline personality disorder by Drs and psychiatrists. I'm just going to take it as "one more label" if I do come out BPD (sounds like a pregnancy test). I can relate to abandonment. My biological mother left when I was two or there about. And from what I know she certainly had issues. I sometimes like to think of her as merely an "egg donor" who passed on some really bad genes to me.

[Freakout]

There is a big debate I feel Hooligan around personality, temperament and affective spectrums which the profession itself cannot seem to agree on. I have strong borderline features but I also have these blissful states I have never been able to explain before and now feel I have an answer. According to borderline diagnosis elation or bliss rarely comes into the equation. Hence me probably receiving differential diagnosis.

Really empathy for the separation from you biological mother in your early years. Most people cannot understand the devastation one feels when that happens.

[lilypup]

My sympathies to you and above poster regarding your mothers. Your blissful state has me stumped. What will they come up with next?