[HALLIEBETH87]

I cannot think of a word to describe how I have felt. So I am enlisting your help!


Its an on edge, anxious angry feeling...like Im in the middle of a panic attack and THEN my body feels this crazy, restless rage where I literally feel like Ive got to jerk my body around or jump or something to make it go away.

When it happens I feel anxious and scared and like I could just lose it.

I HAVE no idea how to explain really what this is. I have dealt with anxiety all my life but NOTHING like this!


Thank you!

[Justugh]

holidays are natural magnifiers of this kinds of stuff

the word u are looking for is shell shocked ....flight or fight reaction but fear paralyzing with no clear danger cause it just a general being of impending doom

is that it ?

[HALLIEBETH87]

OMG!!! that's it! I don't have reason for this anxiety. I always deal with some and lately I dealt with some family issues that caused panic attacks but I have NEVER felt this before and its incredibly uncomfortable. I already took klonopin and it hasn't gone away. Im still working the coping skills but its hasn't let up yet. Its gone away some today but BAM its right back!

I really don't know how to cope with this feeling because its not usual anxiety. Earlier I went for a drive with window down for fresh cold air to breath (brrr)

[Justugh]

well the sad news is only thing u can do is pressure valve it to let some steam off so it is contained until the season passes (new years eve party takes whole new meaning now)

u named it now so if it does not go away with some sleep after tonight .............mini vacation time pick a direction drive 90 to 120 miles and spend 2 /3 days just checking out what ever is there for that time u just have fun and destress

the only other choice is to blow the bomb in the room and end the stress at home .........but not everyone can do this and handle the fall out from it this is only ment as something to end it all it fixes self or never deal with it again (after several years of it becomes a choice)

i blew the bombs up i could not take it anymore it was madding ........that was my coping method (they still instinct i come ....but now they warn me who will be there so i can go in heavy drugged if one of the known triggers are there .........but they basically cut him out he is a asshole now they see it )

[HALLIEBETH87]

Heres the thing: This is like day 2 1/2 of this. Sleep did not fix it. No fund for a road trip or I would! And actually theres no crap going on in my home right now. It was on vacation that it happened! weird, huh?

So I really truly cannot see why this **** is here.

[Angelique67]

I got something similar once (in degree) on a too high dose of Zoloft. I know how alarming this feeling is. If possible, yoga? Exercise? Anything that may let you naturally expend energy and let some of the tumultuous energy out. Good luck with this. I hope you'll feel more like yourself soon.

[HALLIEBETH87]

Ty. So far, no. Klonopin isn't knocking this out. Its late and I should be sleeping but if I lay still it gets worse.

[hamster-bamster]

Hallie, the description makes me suspect akathisia (which I had many times and which is torturous), but since I do not know what meds you take, I cannot even guess what might be causing it.

[HALLIEBETH87]

It's an almost agitated feeling I think

[HALLIEBETH87]

I woke up super chill and it's already back. I haven't even gotten out if bed. So confused

[Justugh]

well then the choices left open are limited

the best one would be seeing the hospital ER talking to the pdoc on shift and having something added to the meds until u can see the normal doctor for a adjustment

other choice is smoke a joint ( just know todays weed is strong strong so do not smoke the whole thing just 3 puffs should do u ) weed works for me ......do not do anything illegal

[HALLIEBETH87]

So I just punched my cousin's wall and made an existing hole larger.

Ive never been like this. It may be a good thing I see my pdoc today. Hopefully I am calm while Im there.

[Justugh]

try music to defuse u

something that makes u happy and calm ...........if that does not work flip to death metal and rage out until no more rage left ..........turn the beast loose until it turns into a puppy u can put away again

hit the gun range and rent something blow away some paper targets ( no human targets no faces on the targets .....but u can write sommething on it with magic marker then shoot at that )

[HALLIEBETH87]

I told my Dr. everything that's happened and how I feel and embarrassed myself by having a complete breakdown in her office. After all my rambling and crying she asked if I wanted to go to leave via the backdoor so I wouldn't have to walk through the waiting room full of people. And I just finally told her I didn't know if I could handle another week of this craziness. She wants me to call her Friday if I don't feel better by then.

She didn't change meds or anything but said I can take klonopin twice a day.

Annoying

[Angelique67]

Be careful with that Klonopin though. I wish you felt better.

[Justugh]

ok is the country gal thing just something someone added or is that a reflection of u

if so

break it out rednecks style ................u need some mudding in a nice field ..........afterwards u need a bonfire in the middle of a field with several friends and family along with several 30 packs or a keg (some horse shoes or bag toss....a few games of @sshole .....guys cooking meat on the fire / ladies putting them out when they light on fire from being drunk and dumbasses )

if that is not right
go to art museum they are quite clam places find a nice seat and get lost in a painting for little bit ........after that hit the winebar (always somewhere close) have half a bottle go home sleep .....see if that does it

[HALLIEBETH87]

country gal is the title I chose because I decided I didn't want to be whatever if was that it said before. I live in the country.

[Justugh]

ok then go mudding

in the middle of some field just let the truck/car go and have fun slide figure 8s dounuts

yell weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

just random fun no point no anything just like when u were a kid just to do it because it looks fun