[Birdseed]

My husband is bipolar. We have been together for 20 years.I am so tired of being the rock and dependable one in the relationship. I am 53 years old and I don't think I can do this anymore. He cycles on and off his meds and now he just decided to stop one med because of the cost. He had a meltdown early Monday morning. Each meltdown rips my soul apart and I lose a piece of it each time. He used to destroy things in his rages, but now he raves verbally and is verbally abusive towards me during his meltdowns. Then, once the episode is over for him he expects everything to go back to normal. He doesn't remember how hateful he is to me but unfortunately I do. I can't get over it as quickly as he does and he doesn't understand what the big deal is for me. He has almost ruined us financially with his many unfinished projects and I am at my wits end. I stay depressed, resentful and bitter towards him. I have lost all respect for him. We have separated many times in our 20 years and I see another break up coming. Help.

[Crazy Hitch]

Hi Birdseed

Thank you for introducing yourself to us.

Welcome to Psych Central.

This is a great place to be for online support.

I might suggest these forums for you:

Relationships & Communication - Forums at Psych Central

Partners of People & Caregivers Support - Forums at Psych Central

If you need any help or support navigating the site please feel free to contact one our Community Liaisons. We will be happy to help you.

May you find the comfort and support that you deserve.

Take care.

Hooli

[sideblinded]

Birdseed, I mainly just want to welcome you to PC.

Others will have some input for you. Bipolar is difficult illness to manage but many relationships do have success. There is always hope. Best wishes and I hope that you find the answers that you are hoping for.

[CANDC]

Welcome to Psych Central (PC) birdseed. Sorry to hear you are having chronic difficulties with your husband. The first thing I am concerned about is how you have been verbally battered in this relationship. A therapist or some kind of advocate that can help with reality checks. There are things that other couples have done like have separate finances, have ground rules for your relationship, like taking the meds every day.

Whatever you decide, Psych Central can be part of how you reach out to people who understand your situation. Some people find the forums give them the compassion and empathy they seek. http://forums.psychcentral.com

There are articles that go into more detail about coping
Psych Central - Trusted mental health, depression, bipolar, ADHD & psychology information.

Please feel free to private message any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.

[kaliope]

hi birdseed.
it is very challenging living with someone with mental health issues. most important is taking care of yourself. if he refuses to stay on his meds, there is no reason for you to have to take the abuse. MI or not, he could do something about his issues and chooses not to it sounds like. take care of you. he is choosing to be miserable by not taking his meds, you do not have to choose to be miserable also. choose joy. welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome

[Fuzzybear]