[Rebel_in_need999]

At the time i 'm writing this,i realize it's all over.The last episode left me nearly dead for 5 days.Plus,i can't find a doctor to go.I can't stand it anymore.Now i'm starting to feel detached from reality too.I think i'm losing my mind and i can't find a decent psychiatrician to go.It's the end.I can't find anything to calm me and i feel like i'm locked in a room,a square,black room without colors and i see the outside world from a window,all grey,all black,all dead...

[darkeyes]

Can you have a local medical center direct you to their behavioural health department?
Sounds like you are in crisis, you may need to call 9-1-1.
Hang out here for awhile, some members are due to drop in soon, talk to us, sometimes it can help to just chat with another person who has or is going through the same or similar thing.
Please take care,
DE

[Direction]

Sounds like you are going through a lot...now would be a good time to call...

I'll be on for another hour - post if you can...

[Direction]

How are you doing?

[Rebel_in_need999]

A little better.Thanks.I found some kind of psychiatrist and i will surely go.It was awful to be in that "room",now i got out i feel very relieved.I realised,after doing some research by myself,that this might be an alter,met in dissociative identity disorder,between my childhood personality and me now.It made sense,because i became a new person suddenly in 1 year and this might have made a dual personality.I freaked out when i read this and that also explains the memory loss i had.I believe i will surely need expert help quickly before it happens again...

But i can't figure out something.My symptoms match both bipolar disorder and DID.But why in that episode i could understand what i was doing when I got out of reality?

[Direction]

I'm glad you are doing a little better and will be seeing someone. Not sure about your last question - only thing I do know is a lot of symptoms overlap...

When is your appointment set?

[Rebel_in_need999]

Tomorrow.I'm a little anxious and i feel a bit odd that i have to go to the doctor.Some years ago i said that i would never have to go to a psychiatrist.Anyway,i believe that i will get better in some weeks and i will start posting again,cause i had a long time to post to the other members here.

[Reesie]

Hello Rebel - I just found this thread today, and I'm so glad you finally got an appointment. Sorry to hear about the episode. Please post here and tell what you find out at the psychiatrist's. Thinking about you. . . .

[Rebel_in_need999]

Thanks,Reesie.I will.You all were here when i needed you.I told my friends about this too and they are standing by my side tomorrow.My memory improved tremendously and i can remember things again.I beat some fears and i'm starting to put things back in my life a bit.I'm aftering my goals again.A new hope is born.Anyway,i;m rushing too much.I am very curious to hear the pdoc's diagnosis tomorrow.Very curious.

Goodnight.

Rebel.

[Rebel_in_need999]

Went to the pdoc.He was very nice and i bumped into a very good doctor.We closed an appointment for the next week and he told me tobe brave cause this is something serious but i can get over ir with time and he told me to write my thoughts in a diary because it will help him with the treatment.Anyway,i got them off my chest and i feel very relieved.I'm looking forward to Tuesday.

[Reesie]

Rebel, I'm glad to hear you finally have had your first appointment and it sounds good, after what you have been going through for so long.

[Direction]

I'm so glad...