[DysphoricManicMom]

I used to always make a list of things to get done in a day and get overwhelmed and anxious then extremely irritated.

Now Im where Im so afraid to get to that point that I have anxiety about it in itself. I overthink and try to think ahead and finagle things so I am not putting myself into stressful situations but then I am driving myself crazy.

I am also afraid to do more than 1 or 2 things a day, sometimes I wont do anything because Im afraid Ill be overwhelmed. Its not like when I am depressed and dont want to do anything. I want to do so much and I have to fight with myself because before even when I felt confident that I wasnt going to head into anxiety and irritibility I always did anyway. So now it doesnt matter how good I feel or how confident I am, I have to limit myself, but then end up stressed out amd have anxiety about what I didnt do that I wanted or needed to.

Its a ****ing conundrum. I need to get this anxiety under control. Anyone struggle with this conflict?

[DysphoricManicMom]

Also..has anyone had any problem with nicotine making anxiety worse?

[cashart10]

I struggle with worry all the time but it is managable. When I am in the midst of an episode, I often experience extreme anxiety as you have described. I've yet to find a solution and it generally leads to bizarre behavior. The only solution I have is my prn.

I'm so sorry you are experiencing this! Have you talked to your doctor about it?

[Alone & confused]

Originally Posted by DysphoricManicMom

I used to always make a list of things to get done in a day and get overwhelmed and anxious then extremely irritated.

Now Im where Im so afraid to get to that point that I have anxiety about it in itself. I overthink and try to think ahead and finagle things so I am not putting myself into stressful situations but then I am driving myself crazy.

I am also afraid to do more than 1 or 2 things a day, sometimes I wont do anything because Im afraid Ill be overwhelmed. Its not like when I am depressed and dont want to do anything. I want to do so much and I have to fight with myself because before even when I felt confident that I wasnt going to head into anxiety and irritibility I always did anyway. So now it doesnt matter how good I feel or how confident I am, I have to limit myself, but then end up stressed out amd have anxiety about what I didnt do that I wanted or needed to.

Its a ****ing conundrum. I need to get this anxiety under control. Anyone struggle with this conflict?

I am SO there with you! I had a doosy of an attack just today! Over a marriage proposal of all things! I ended up breaking down and taking my miss a stabilizer ( which ticked me off because it killed the hypo state I was enjoying! ) Lately I have to have someone go with me to go shopping or pretty much anywhere else because for one I just can't make myself go anymore, and two to keep me calm while I'm out. This is kind of a new thing for me. I used to enjoy getting out by myself. Now it's becoming a trigger for me. I also make lists for everything. It's the only hope I have of staying on task. I've had my dx for quite a few years now, but it seems to be getting worse as I get older.

[BlackSheep79]

I make lists and freak out when I don't get everything done. I just add it to next weeks list, and then the next week if need be. I went through a really bad time a year and a half ago, bad reaction to Latuda. I literally was barely able to shower. When I finally began to get better I would do one thing a day, like vacuum maybe a room. I was slowly able to get back to my old self baby steps at a time. Don't be so hard on yourself, that's what I try to do.

[DysphoricManicMom]

Originally Posted by cashart10

I struggle with worry all the time but it is managable. When I am in the midst of an episode, I often experience extreme anxiety as you have described. I've yet to find a solution and it generally leads to bizarre behavior. The only solution I have is my prn.

I'm so sorry you are experiencing this! Have you talked to your doctor about it?

I just started getting into it with the therapist. Im calling my doctor monday because my appt is nov 4th and i cant wait til then. I take buspar but it doesnt even touch it and even makes my irritibility worse. I called in fri but didnt realize they closed at noon..which is the stupidest thing i have ever heard. Wish my doc gave me her cell number like someone else on here said theirs did for them!

[DysphoricManicMom]

I know its so hard not ti be hard on myself, i worry eveey day about everything and being a bad mother is at the top of the list..so scared im screwing my children up.

Thanks for the kind words

[WibblyWobbly]

YES!! I can't stop making lists and yet once I make them I'm absolutely paralyzed. A couple weeks ago I stopped making daily lists and instead made weekly lists. I put 2 big things (the stuff that causes me the most anxiety) that I want to get done that week on the list (ex. oil change, call health insurance about unpaid hospital bills). My big things are scheduled 2—3 weeks out so if for some reason I can't or really don't want to do one of them, I can push it back and pick something else that needs to get done.

I do NOT put vacuuming, laundry or any of that on my list. This lets me have "free days" sometimes and I'm not beating myself up if it takes an extra day or two to get something done. I'm already much more motivated to do those routine tasks since they're not hanging over my head every day. I felt like such a failure when I wasn't able to get everything done.

I don't know if this will help you since you're a mom and I just have to look out for myself, but I'm sure you can find a way to get the necessaries done while being more forgiving to yourself.