Started smoking after 35 years of not smoking cigarettes

Well,since I cracked my molar and lost the adjacent filling I'm having a hard time eating.
Plus the extreme hunger is depleted when I smoke. Only 2 packs for now. About 5 cigarettes each day. It does help with calming my nerves.

I made my friend mad when I was very defeatist and said so what if it's bad for me. I have no value anyway.

My friends smoke weed and cigars.

I'm not going to make a habit of it. I do remember when I quit 35 years ago thinking,"This is the hardest thing I've ever done!".

But after having to taper off all kinds of psych meds I know that's way way harder.

I'm sick of being 40 lbs over weight. My clothes don't fit. I look like a pig even in a one piece bathing suit.

I know this is a very temporary solution. It did help me cope when I found out one worker and 15 year friend embezzled $1027.00 and somehow got his name on my husbands account.

I prevented more problems by simply cleaning out my husbands acct.

Expecting company tomorrow,and I've never had to be a closet smoker. I know I'll have urges.

I wonder if I can hide it? It's not really me, given the fact that it's been 35 years of non smoking.

Plus I don't smoke weed. Or cigars.

I want to make a nice impression. We've been eml buddy's for 2 1/2 years.

The mental illness I suffer has never been a topic I've broached.

Oh God.

Am I tempting fate?

Ugh put it down. I started smoking after being quit for three years. I went inpatient and wound up picking it back up. I wish I never did.
I switched to e cigarettes, which is better, but I really wish I had never started the cycle of nicotine addiction again.

I'm with Jupiter3, quit right now! It sounds like you've been manic the past couple of weeks and maybe you are smoking again because of that. Sometimes we just have to be aware of where we are at mentally.

I got emphysema from smoking cigars. And inhaling.
It will be hard for you to get emphysema, but from what I've read
the first few years smoking are the critical ones.
That's why people that haven't smoked in 20+ years get it.

I'm into eCigs now. Not that I think they are much better.
I don't inhale now, but can fill a room with vapor with one puff.
Nicotine is the most adictive substance I know.
I've been able to quit a few things along the way, but not nicotine.

Thanks for remembering. Yes my international trip back and forth and the unexpected crap did get me manic. I smoked in Florida, about 6 cigarettes

It's almost like the people who self harm. I'm embarrassed to say l don't care what happens. But I know it's gotta end quickly. I'm getting company tomorrow and husband comes mid March.

I'd stop while it'll be easier to. I smoke and need to quit too (average five cigarettes a day).

My problem is staying quit. I can quit just fine. I've done it using the lozenges or the ecig, but then I start again out of habit or stress.

I quit about 5 years ago ~ best thing I've ever done.

If you think it helps you become calm, I have good news: Anything from breathing-technique to mindfulness will help you calm.
Why? cigarettes themselves don't calm the non-smoker, it does the exact opposite.
It can calm the regular smoker because his body is upset and in need for nicotine, once he gets it, he calms, but he wudn't even be in need for this if it wasn't for smoking to start with. see? so if it calms you, u're tricking urself, learn better way to trick your mind.

To be honest I'd smoke weed casually
cheers have fun with company

I have been considering medical marijuana.
I've smoked a few times in my life. It feels kinda like pain killers.

Yes. I know. You may not be breathing deeply,but when you smoke you do
Still no excuse I know. I don't think my company will appreciate me smoking.
Don't think I'm hooked yet,so should be ok. More people smoke in Central America than in the USA,at least in CALIFORNIA.

Look smoking is great at the time. Then at the end of the day, your throat starts to hurt. You start getting that cough. And then you need to celebrate taking a shower, getting the mail, all by having a cigarette.

After a few months it's swollen glands, scratchy voice, always clearing throat, a pack a day, being paranoid about smelling, and planning your day to include a trip to the convenience store. Coughing up some pretty scary looking stuff. Smoking when you're sick or have a cold and believing the delusion that tobacco is a medication because native Americans used it that way. I've experienced all of these and more.

Been there, done that several times. Always the same pattern. It starts with 1 or 2, "this is great, and this is all I need". Then stress happens and "ah big deal, I've got more in the pack." Soon every stressor requires 1 cigarette. Then 2 cigarettes. Then every behavior you do requires a cigarette. Then not doing anything becomes stressful and requires a cigarette. Then I don't feel secure unless I've got another pack, or another carton on hand... So I can smoke as much as I want, and not have to worry about running out. But I can still control it, right? I'll cut back tomorrow. I'll cut back next week. Next month is gonna be rough, I'll cut back after next month.

So you slipped after 35 years. Stop now, cuz it's gonna be harder than heck once you're up to 10-15-20 cigarettes a day. I was up to 25-30 a day until I got chantix and started changing my life so it didn't revolve around smoking. I was (and still am) fearful and scared of therapists, but took a huge risk and did a couple sessions to help with healthier relaxation strategies to replace the cigarette.

Slipping after 35 years doesn't mean you are a failure, and isn't a good excuse to keep smoking. It's a great excuse, however, to stop again. Cuz you know you're capable of stopping for 35 years.

I appreciate hearing about everyone's experience. Thank you for sharing.

It's so socially unacceptable now a days, plus so bad for health.

I think my psych meds are bad for me,but for now I'm going to stay on them. They're keeping me pretty stable.

I like the gum. No one can smell the nicotine that way LOL.
You know you gotta quit and you got practice. You got this

Thanks for the vote of confidence. Only 3 cigs left. Then I'm done. No more.