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#1
Feb 27, 2016, 11:21 AM
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Whoohoo, I can write again!
Thank you Stability, you were sorely missed! 
__________________
Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. |
 1278, cashart10, Xand
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 1278, cashart10, gina_re
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#2
Feb 27, 2016, 11:26 AM
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That's awesome! I'm happy for you!
__________________
***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
| Icare dixit
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#3
Feb 29, 2016, 09:28 AM
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I kneel at the altar of St. Ability!
I wish you (all) the same! Always.
__________________
Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. |
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#4
Mar 01, 2016, 01:36 PM
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When I am stable some BPD-like traits come up which I acquired when I was 9 or so I think. At least I now have sense of control over my behaviour.
For any of you that have comorbid BP and BPD, do you ever notice something similar?
__________________
Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. |
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#5
Mar 01, 2016, 02:01 PM
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Quote:
I find that when I'm stable on meds that my control over my BPD is more stable too. But I went yeeeeaaaars of stopping my meds, self medicating, and just out of control with my BPD. After 12 years with my BP I didn't snap out of it and take my meds seriously until a few months ago after one of the worst depressions I've had. Now I've come to terms with the fact that I need meds, probably for the rest of my life. And OP I'm happy for you and your stability! I was doing great until about 2 months ago when I got a new job and fell off the deep end from the stress. I lost the job...Now I'm dealing with hypo and trying to find a shred on sanity until my appointment on the 14th! Good luck to all of us! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
| Icare dixit
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| Icare dixit
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#6
Mar 01, 2016, 02:03 PM
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Quote:
__________________
dx: bipolar II wellbutrin citalopram lamotrigine |
| Icare dixit
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| Icare dixit
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#7
Mar 01, 2016, 03:58 PM
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Quote:
I have control back now. I can grow up now. And yes, the outlook is mesmerising!
__________________
Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. |
| Takeshi
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#8
Mar 01, 2016, 07:42 PM
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That's great!!
 
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| Icare dixit
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#9
Mar 01, 2016, 07:59 PM
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I'm adding to the stability happy dance!
    
__________________
I used to rule the world Seas would rise when I gave the word Now in the morning, I sleep alone Sweep the streets I used to own I used to roll the dice Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes Listen as the crowd would sing Now the old king is dead! Long live the king! One minute I held the key Next the walls were closed on me And I discovered that my castles stand Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand |
| Icare dixit
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#10
Mar 02, 2016, 09:56 AM
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Just had an appointment with NP but my psychiatrist walked in.
My psychiatrist doesn't think I am stable. And I trust her. She is the most normal person I know.  I just know too few sane people! I feel deflated. Like BPD-like reactive depressive deflated. I think I could cry now.  Thank you for your support.
__________________
Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. |
| 1278, Takeshi
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#11
Mar 02, 2016, 10:44 AM
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It's a lot to process, being told you're not stable, when you've been happy with the thought of being stable. Reminds me of the stock market loosing points, not because of the actual economic situation, but because of unspecified fears.
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| Icare dixit
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#12
Mar 02, 2016, 03:28 PM
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I feel like I worked myself all the way up from schizophrenia to the borderline, mesmerised by the view, filled with possibilities. Unable to cross it.
This valley of sorrow! Go too far down and fumes will intoxicate you Go up and winds will keep turning Go higher and squalls will throw you off your feet On crossing the borderline Just bigger than a rabbit hole. Thanks for the hugs! I needed that.
__________________
Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide. See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me. Last edited by Icare dixit; Mar 02, 2016 at 03:41 PM. |
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#13
Mar 02, 2016, 03:58 PM
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 I am happy that you are able to be creative again through your writing. After anti-psychotics I have started to paint again. There isn't a better feeling.
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| Icare dixit
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