Drunk while on meds and the world

Okay so I have been drinking all night which is definitely not good with my heavy med load but at least I still had enough common sense to skip the sleeping pills. I am very prone to seizures so I still had to take my regular meds. I have passed out twice and both times as soon as I wake I make another drink.

My wife went to visit her daughter in the main city in my province and every time I am left alone I drink. Maybe because I have zero friends and have cut off ALL ties with both my large family and her even larger family.

I know that nobody can can stand to be around me and I understand why but it still hurts. My wife is my only friend in the world. I remember when I used to drink at bars all day I had lots of friends but as soon as I quit drinking (for seven years) I had none. Although most of them Have dies through alcohol related incidents.

I guess the main point I should make is that I am so totally depressed by the state of the world brought about by the USA and drinking makes me think about it constantly. I am afraid of the changes that are coming so much so that I often have tremors of fear. I don’t know why I can not change the future.

I hate world for all of the evil people, I hate myself for not doing anything to change it and I hate myself for being so severely bipolar (et al) that I don’t even try to make change when I know that every voice matters.

I just had to some stuff off my chest by posting this. I’m not sure if it will help me at all.

Thanks for reading this!

Dear Ripose,

I am sorry you feel so low-down, but nothing will get better unless you stop drinking. It might be time to go to Alcoholics Anonymous. Best of luck to you.

Woolly Bugger.

remember self destructive behaviour is just that ... self destructive ...

your not responsible for the evils and stupidity of the world ... in the end you are only responsible for yourself .... the best way to help the world is to take care of yourself first .... save and change "your piece of the world" ... take care my friend ... people here care ... and want you to have the life I know you can ... I wish you peace and love .... Tigger ..

I don't think I need to go to AA because I drink once or twice a year but the thought is appreciated.

Tigger I do feel responsible because all I do is read and watch videos and I do nothing to help the situation, even the little bit that one person can make . However change starts with one person and spreads, sometimes like wildfire.

Your responses are greatly appreciated, thank you.

From your post I would urge you to go to Alcoholics Anonymous. The kind of drinking you're doing is dangerous to yourself.

Uncontrollable and dangerous drinking is still alcoholism even if it only happens "once or twice" a year. I still suggest you go to AA.

I feel this way often too....helpless... I just can't take on the world's problems when I have so many of my own. I think you are being hard on yourself. Also, if you cut down on your exposure to the news and such, it might help. Once you can get yourself to a good place then maybe you can make a difference. Maybe instead of doing a little bit with your one self/voice often, you will do something bigger and more impactful just once or twice....just my 2cents

I'm no stranger to self destructive substance abuse and self loathing. Here's a tip: stop watching the news for awhile. Studies show that people who watch the news on a regular basis are more prone to stress and depression. It seems only the bad stuff makes it on tv or the papers.

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Indeed. All these shootings make me want to stay indoors most of the time.

I don't even watch mainstream media or read newspapers because I want the truth about the world. I only watch and read independent media which tells the truth about the and so is even more depressing. But are right maybe I should cut down instead reading and watching 5 hours a day.

I still think AA is a cult and it just not right for me.

...... be well my friend ..

Hugs and take care, try to be kind to yourself

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You can't control what happens outside of your own world...........just be you. Nothing more, nothing less.

I get it.
So you binge drink when she is away.
oh well it is not the end of the world, you are being hard on yourself.
let go of that.
When my hubby is away I am on the internet for like 7 hours at a time. Not good.
I too am a binge drinker.
AA is a cult IMO....
As long as you are safe and not driving-....
I am sorry that you don't have any friends.
is there any way you could try to rekindle any of your famly ties?
It is good that you have come here to post. People here will listen to you.
and I will never judge you about your drinking.
bizi