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#1
May 03, 2016, 11:51 AM
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This is how the story goes. My sister and I went over the phone records again and we found a number that he has spoken with for up to 4 hours at a time. So, my sister called the number and pretended like it was the wrong number; it was a woman, of course. This and the fact that last night he texted me to tell me he was crashing at a friend's house because he was too tired to drive home pretty much seals his fate.
__________________
***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
 1278, Anonymous45023, Anonymous48850, Anonymous59125, BastetsMuse, BeyondtheRainbow, BipolaRNurse, boogiesmash, gina_re, kindachaotic, lunaticfringe, MusicLover82, NoIdeaWhatToDo, pirilin, raspberrytorte, shortandcute, violet66, Wanderlust90, wildflowerchild25
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#2
May 03, 2016, 12:07 PM
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Oh Sarah....I'm so sorry. Of course you can't know until you have more proof but I'm sorry you are even having to suspect this.
I am so very sad for you and praying for you. Are you going to confront him?
__________________
Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2.5 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily |
| shortandcute
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 cashart10, shortandcute
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#3
May 03, 2016, 12:35 PM
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That's horrible. I definitely don't blame you for being suspicious. I would be suspicious too.
Did you get the girl's name by chance? You could look her up on Facebook to see if she's friends with him (assuming they both use Facebook). |
| cashart10
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#4
May 03, 2016, 12:40 PM
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I'm so sorry to hear about this, cash. Are you going to ask him about it?
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "What if I can't get up and stand tall, What if the diamond days are all gone, and Who will I be when the Empire falls? Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token |
| cashart10
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#5
May 03, 2016, 01:06 PM
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Big HUGS
Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G930A using Tapatalk
__________________
Current Meds Lamictal 200 mg x2 Seroquel 100 mg |
| cashart10
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#6
May 03, 2016, 01:18 PM
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There may be an explanation for your husband's behavior...
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| Anrea, cashart10, SillyMom
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#7
May 03, 2016, 01:30 PM
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It's probably not about you but about his guilty conscience if this is true.
__________________
Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
| cashart10
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#8
May 03, 2016, 02:46 PM
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I confronted him right away. He said no, of course. He said she was a good Christian friend trying to get him to stay with me. But, what would a married man be sneaking HOURS long phone calls to another woman if they weren't at least emotionally involved? I might be naïve but I'm not that niave. After our conversation about this other woman, he told me that without a shadow of a doubt he wanted a divorce...no more therapy, no more ministry.
__________________
***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
| Anonymous41403, Anonymous45023, Anrea, gina_re, Nammu, raspberrytorte
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| Mondayschild
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#9
May 03, 2016, 02:50 PM
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I went through the same hing with my ex. I suspected he was cheating for a long time and of course he always said no that he would never do that. Then one day out of the blue he said he wanted a divorce. He told me if I got back on meds and changed some things we could work it out. He said he needed to separate while I did these things. I did everything he asked and then found out from a friend he had moved in with his girlfriend he had been cheating on me with when we separated.
I'm so sorry this is happening. I know how it feels. Hugs.
__________________
Bipolar I Borderline Personality Disorder ADHD Generalized Anxiety Disorder "You," he said, "are a terribly real thing in a terribly false world, and that, I believe, is why you are in so much pain.” ― Emilie Autumn, The Asylum for Wayward Victorian Girls |
| Anrea, cashart10
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#10
May 03, 2016, 02:55 PM
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Sounds like a cheater to me if he says he wants to divorce.
Sorry that he's being such an @sshole. No one deserves that sort of treatment.  I don't know why people can't be faithful |
| cashart10
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#11
May 03, 2016, 02:59 PM
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I'm so sorry. I wish this wasn't happening to you. Take care of yourself and your kids.
 
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| cashart10
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#12
May 03, 2016, 03:50 PM
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How are you doing? That's awkwardly phrased but I hope you'll know what I mean; I realize you clearly aren't doing great.
__________________
Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2.5 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily |
| cashart10
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#14
May 03, 2016, 03:58 PM
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Ok don't shoot me. Hear him out. Does he want to drop her and make all amends and work on your relationship? Or is he done. Are you willing to work at it and give him the chance to try again?
Everyone messes up once in a while. Just don't say things you don't mean, keep a cool head. Your marriage can be saved Sent from my SM-G920T using Tapatalk |
| Anrea, cashart10
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#15
May 03, 2016, 03:59 PM
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Quote:
#Life is a beautiful lie# |
| cashart10
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#16
May 03, 2016, 04:00 PM
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Also, big hugs. I'm sorry. This most be really painful.
#Life is a beautiful lie# |
| cashart10
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#17
May 03, 2016, 04:16 PM
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Big hugs!!! I'm so, so sorry. As other people pointed out, there could be various other things happening. Please keep strong and wait till you have more information before sealing his fate. (((Hugs)))
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| cashart10
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#18
May 03, 2016, 04:29 PM
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Quote:
__________________
***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
| Anonymous59125, Nammu
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| Anrea
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#19
May 03, 2016, 04:38 PM
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Quote:
My brother is going to talk to him about it.
__________________
***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
| Anrea
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#20
May 03, 2016, 04:39 PM
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Quote:
__________________
***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
| Anrea
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#21
May 03, 2016, 04:40 PM
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I am SO GLAD that you have your wonderful therapist already in place if you must go through this time. She sounds very practical and I know that always feels calming to me when things are unbearable.
Please PM me if you need specific prayers or anything else.
__________________
Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2.5 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily |
| cashart10
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#22
May 03, 2016, 04:46 PM
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Sorry for the harsh thread title and sorry for the language and for being hateful if I am. I know it may be an excuse but I am very, very upset and at my wit's end.
__________________
***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
| 1278, Anrea, BipolaRNurse, gina_re, Nammu, NoIdeaWhatToDo
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#23
May 03, 2016, 04:54 PM
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One thing I learned after my divorce (and I, much like you tried everything within my power to make him stay, but cheating is where I drew the line once I found out about it.) is that even though divorce is painful and awful. Getting divorced from a person who doesn't want to be with you or no longer can live with the person he hunks you've become is a far better choice for both you and your children. It takes two people to want a reconciliation to work, and shaming or coercing him with religion is likely only going to make him resent you and the family members who are helping you to convince him to stay. Even if this works and he decides to stay, it would be short lived and miserable. If he really wants a divorce and says his mind is made up, IMO it's better to give it to him and move on with your life. I am living proof that there are better things out there for you and your children.
As much as I wanted to bend over backwards and try to save my first marriage letting him go and moving on allowed me to find a man who is willing to walk to hell and back with me and my disease and treats my son as his own. On top of that I also got to move to Sweden, which was a life long dream of mine. Life won't end if your marriage does, it will just end a chapter in your life. You're allowed to have more than one great love. Perhaps your time with your current husband is up, but there is so much out there for you to discover that can enrich and enhance your life. I learned that living in misery just to hold onto someone who doesn't want to be held onto isn't worth it. Hugs.
__________________
Bipolar I Borderline Personality Disorder ADHD Generalized Anxiety Disorder "You," he said, "are a terribly real thing in a terribly false world, and that, I believe, is why you are in so much pain.” ― Emilie Autumn, The Asylum for Wayward Victorian Girls |
| Anrea, BipolaRNurse, cashart10, gina_re, Mondayschild, Nammu, Trippin2.0
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#24
May 03, 2016, 04:57 PM
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If both parties want to work at it, it can and will work. Trust me.
Sent from my SM-G920T using Tapatalk |
| cashart10, Mondayschild
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#25
May 03, 2016, 05:03 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Bipolar I Borderline Personality Disorder ADHD Generalized Anxiety Disorder "You," he said, "are a terribly real thing in a terribly false world, and that, I believe, is why you are in so much pain.” ― Emilie Autumn, The Asylum for Wayward Victorian Girls |
| cashart10, Mondayschild, SillyMom, Trippin2.0
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