[Blaire]

I came out to a friend today. I'm very close with this lady, and she knows of my alcoholism, anxiety, and anorexia as she's been by my side throughout the past year, which has been really bad. But despite all that, I'd never told her I'm bipolar.

I don't know why I thought this would be a big deal. She's very non-judgmental, and I trust her to keep things confidential. She has also confided in me about her own serious mental health issues. I guess I was afraid of the information getting out as we work in the same field (different offices, though), which doesn't really make sense because I do trust her.

I've been thinking about telling her for a few months, but I could never work up the nerve. Finally, I decided that I need more support, and she is the obvious choice as she's seen everything else I've been through. But I was so nervous!

She was very cool about it, as expected. She said she's very impressed with how well I've done in my career while contending with this. She said it makes sense now that she knows, but she wouldn't have guessed.

I still feel a little anxiety over it, but I think it was the right thing to do. We are very open with each other, and I'm relieved that I can now speak freely about this with her.

So I'm wondering...how open are you guys with other people about your bipolar disorder?

[Gray Rider]

I don't feel the need to be very open about it unless it has the potential to seriously affect someone else's life. That would be in a serious romantic, close friend, or private business type relationship. And there's others I'm sure.

In a service work or support group it may provide ways for others to focus on similarities.

[Victoria'smom]

My mom, dad, sisters, best friend, husband son.

[annielovesbacon]

Nobody in my life knows, but I was only recently diagnosed. I'm a very private person in general, so I don't plan on telling anyone unless I absolutely have to.

[raspberrytorte]

Right now I'd go on a building and shout it out to the world. I don't care. lol

Being serious, obviously my husband knows about my situation, and after seven or eight years and nine doctors giving me the same diagnosis (well, two of them said schizoaffective bipolar type), we've finally seen it for what it is.

Well it's not like I broadcast my mental health but I definitely do not hide it.

[gina_re]

Originally Posted by justafriend306

Well it's not like I broadcast my mental health but I definitely do not hide it.

Same here. About 75% of the people I interact with know. I'm open about it, but that doesn't mean I tell everyone I meet. I personally haven't had any negative experiences with people knowing, so I guess that's why it's not too difficult for me to share. In fact, many people are somewhat shocked when I tell them.

[UpDownMiddleGround]

Other than my team . . . My two brothers, mother, two best friends, prayer partner at church, pastor at a church in my community

this is a tough question...
i grew up with parents who flatly refused to believe in illness, or believe in emotional problems- so they sort of taught me that if i tried to be open with anyone, it was associated with even more emotional abuse

like...

me: i'm feeling down and alone, not sure what to do

response: well, go jump off a bridge then if you're feeling that low

so growing up, being taught what i was, and not having any real friends, being open is hard

if someone asks me a question, maybe i'll start talking about it but not be fully open- because i'm afraid of being emotionally abused by them (i never got over it, my parents set me up for life with that fear)

i don't hide my mental illness though... their's no point- because people usually can tell

people ask me.. are you bipolar, you sure act it.. and i'm like well, um, yeah.. maybe that's because i am

but apart from that, if something's going on, i'm the last to say

[Gabyunbound]

I've told very few people (5) -2 with a relative with BP 1 guessed on their own. It's probably irrational thinking but part of me is afraid that if I tell more people (especially people I don't know very well) it will look like I'm either 'showing off' somehow (BP is a bit of a dx du jour) or that I'm expecting pity or some sort of accommodations. On the other hand, I'm afraid so many people wouldn't understand what the heck it means (though may think they do) and I can't be bothered to educate (except those very close to me).

None of this is very rational, but they are reasons why I tend to keep it to myself. Truth be told, I'm a bit ashamed as well...

Only my family knows, and 2 friends a talk with off of here that I met on here. They no longer post. But recently I made a new friend and I don't plan on telling her until I know her really well. And an old friend recently came back in my life and I don't plan on telling her until I feel really comfortable. Bipolar is just a part of me.... So I guess I'm not that open about it.

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

...i grew up with parents who flatly refused to believe in illness, or believe in emotional problems- so they sort of taught me that if i tried to be open with anyone, it was associated with even more emotional abuse

so growing up, being taught what i was, and not having any real friends, being open is hard

if someone asks me a question, maybe i'll start talking about it but not be fully open- because i'm afraid of being emotionally abused by them (i never got over it, my parents set me up for life with that fear)

if something's going on, i'm the last to say

Shattered, I can very much relate. (I can't say if it was a matter of belief in it or not, but the elephant in the room was never acknowledged.) Openness was not wise. Negative consequences. I've never gotten past it either.

As for disclosure, pretty minimal. Mostly neutral responses, none were surprised. A couple of dismissive responses stung (the classic "oh, everyone's BP", and "you can't be, because I've never seen you suicidal"(!!) Strange logic.) because I really expected better of them -- one was my last best friend (dead now) and the other had a schizophrenic brother. Guess there's no figuring.

Not in work situation, for sure. (Though symptomatically obvious. Very unusual situation.) I don't have friends and rarely even talk to people, so it's not generally a pressing issue. Even to casual observers, it's pretty obvious at times that something's wrong, but they don't ask, and I don't say.

[hopeless2015]

I've been pretty open but I've been such a mess the last year there is no hiding it...been hospitalized many times and misses a lot of time from work. Hope that I'm on an upswing now and can stay stable for now

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G930A using Tapatalk

[wildflowerchild25]

I'm like hopeless, I've been hospitalized so many times it's impossible for people not to know. But all of my friends and family are very supportive. I haven't been direct at work but have admitted to depression because of my numerous medical leaves.

On Saturday I can out as a self injurer in Facebook, mainly because I wanted to show my new tattoo and the scars were obvious. I got a very positive response.

[LadyShadow]

I don't really tell people that I am bipolar. People that know me like my mom, dad sister and my best friends know. But I usually don't broadcast it because of how bad the stigma is. "She's texting too much, oh she's bipolar" "She cries too much, she's bipolar"

Those statements are so hurtful, yet so common. People like throwing around the word bipolar like its the plague.

When I am manic, I become very open about any and all issues of humaness. It just happens. My stable self is a bit more on the reserved side and depressed I'm down right reclusive and don't share much.

[annielovesbacon]

I am thinking about telling someone next week. Two people, actually. I'm getting lunch with two former teachers whom I trust very much and who are kind of like mother figures to me. I've just finished my first year at university and I am getting SO tired of saying "good! fine!" etc. and smiling whenever people ask me "How was your first year of college?"
I just want, just once, to tell someone the truth. I trust these women, they don't really know anyone else I'd be afraid of them telling (I don't think they would tell anyway) plus I feel that their responses would be positive.
I don't know if I'm going to yet. I think it would feel good to have just at least one other person in the world (besides my T and pdoc) who know. But I'm scared

[BipolaRNurse]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

When I am manic, I become very open about any and all issues of humaness. It just happens. My stable self is a bit more on the reserved side and depressed I'm down right reclusive and don't share much.

I'm the same way.

[Blaire]

Originally Posted by BipolaRNurse

I'm the same way.

Me too, totally.

[MBM17]

About 75% of the people I interact with know. I'm open about it, but that doesn't mean I tell everyone I meet.

Same. 75% of the people I interact with know that I have bipolar. Most people don't understand or relate, though, to bipolar so I end up talking to others about their depression or anxiety since those have always been part of my bipolar. The other folks usually feel less alone after we talk, and I do too most times.

Until a few weeks ago, I'd forgotten that my ultra openness is relatively new. Even just two years ago, I didn't talk about my depression and anxiety (as it was diagnosed then) with many people at all. I had a lot of shame about it. I felt like if I told people then they'd know too much, in a paranoid sense. I also didn't want to talk about it because what if it went away? I believed somewhere inside that if I worked hard enough, the depression and anxiety would go away. If they went away, I didn't want people to know; I wanted to pretend it never happened.

Then when I got my bipolar diagnosis, I realized that this isn't going away. Bipolar doesn't go away. It's a lifelong illness. I'm going to struggle with this for the rest of my life, so I might as well talk about it so that I can get the help I need when I need it. I'm so glad. I am really glad to not have this huge secret inside me.

Part of the reason I used to be quiet about it is probably because I was in such a bad place. If someone else had talked to me while I was doing so badly about their depression or if other people know, it would have been detrimental for me. When I started on bipolar medications, I started feeling better for the first time. Now I can talk to other people about their experience without having it bring me down too.

That is beautiful MBM

[gina_re]

Originally Posted by MBM17

Part of the reason I used to be quiet about it is probably because I was in such a bad place. If someone else had talked to me while I was doing so badly about their depression or if other people know, it would have been detrimental for me. When I started on bipolar medications, I started feeling better for the first time. Now I can talk to other people about their experience without having it bring me down too.

YESSSSS!!! Those are my same thoughts. Once I felt stabile for the first time, well, ever I didn't feel as bad about being 'different' anymore. And now I can take my experiences to help others as needed.

[pirilin]

Depression is worse than anything, including certain types of cancer.
Praying you will never feel depressed again.

[Row Jimmy]

People know certain things about me but very few people know I'm BP. Oddly enough, I've managed to keep that to myself.