[Two Masks]

Originally Posted by hopeless2015

Spoke too soon about feeling peaceful, that didn't ladt long. My husband said something really hurtful this morning and it's left me reeling. I just want to disappear now.

Question. How do you pay for your latuda? It's over $1k in copay for me.

[Standup2me]

I have not had a raise in three years, and our useless gov't is bringing in a carbon tax that will cost everyone about $2,500 extra a year.
Where do these people think this money is going to come from?
Are they that stupid???

[Coffeee]

Originally Posted by bizi

went to trivia at whoe foods tonight had 6 glasses of wine.
ate off the salad bar.low carb but had 3 maccaroons, delicious!
bizi

Holy crap bizi! 6 glasses of wine?! Woah you must have some next level tolerance. I'm glad you had fun

[Coffeee]

Having some annoying insomnia. I got suspended from my job for some hearsay. So frustrating I don't think I'll go back, it's too humiliating. Yet I really need the income grrr.

i am struggling with my friend steven today.

trying to build up the courage to actually write something about him and email it to the funeral home so they can read it on my behalf.

on top of that had some pretty bad flashbacks yesterday and it made me remember stuff i'd rather forget years ago (mainly about family abuse)

[bizi]

sorry shattered(((((HUGS))))

A healthy brunch today:
3 scrambled eggs with fresh spinach. A side of black bean salsa heated up to put on the eggs with some hot sauce and a side of steamed brocolli.
Delicious!

bizi

[hopeless2015]

Struggling today, feeling like a failure

I've noticed that I'm taking a lot of my anger/frustrations out on other people.

I think I'm just in a bad place right now. Not depressed. Just a bad place because of the sui thing.

So I hope no one takes offense to anything I've written.

Originally Posted by hopeless2015

Struggling today, feeling like a failure

I'm sorry you're not feeling so well. You're most definitely not a failure

[June81280]

So I don't know I'm messaging these things the right way? I to know if anyone is having an obsessive fear of death?

[Moose72]

I romanticise death when I'm depressed.

[Moose72]

I took my daughter out for jeans and new tennis shoes. He others all fell apart. I heard an ad for Macy's on Spotify that said juniors jeans are 50% off. Then at the register, the cashier gave us another 20%! The shoes were at a different store and not on sale however. Not terrible for teens shoes.

[Fuzzybear]

The Good will outbalance the Bad

[xRavenx]

I treated myself to a massage today. I carry a lot of tension in my back and neck, so it was really good. Sometimes racing thoughts get in the way, but I try to push them back and just focus on how good the massage feels. It sort of gives me the ability to do some mindfulness learned in therapy. I finally see my therapist again tomorrow. She had been away, so it has been 3 weeks since I've seen her. It's definitely time.

[TheGoatKing333]

Im manic asf and it feels great, i dont look forward to the crash and anger.. ohhhhhh, loom my dad got home lmao. hes a massive trigger for me, im starting to get racing thoughts, not fun, well not that bad. im listening to reggae and it reminds me of my past when i smoked weed. those were fun times.

[Unrigged64072835]

I went to church this morning. Apologized to my neighbor, who accepted my apology. My pastor is going to call me this week about volunteering opportunities.

I worked on my remaining pictures and put them up on Flickr.

Tried to take a nap today and couldn't do it, even though I was tired.

Anxiety was up a little but now feeling sad. Hope this passes. I have T tomorrow.

[Coffeee]

I'm relaxing, made some dinner with the hubs. Had a peaceful day marred only by a few spots of anger. I think I'm starting to get better again.

[zijax]

only getting 3 hrs sleep nt not tired spending gobs of money new bf loads of sex decided to take a little trip to Ireland-sstoked-action, loud music grundge

Still working through the lies I've been telling myself. The truth is out there.

I'm troubled. I'm non compliant with meds... I want to induce a hypo or manic episode just to get that high... I crave that high... I feel like a drug addict. Maybe I am. I have my Adderall from a previous Rx, and it's right there... right there... I'm so tempted to reach for it and take the whole bottle, all 27 of those pills

I was supposed to throw it away, but I can't. I can't do it.

I'm not depressed, but I feel like a lost cause. I don't know what to do with myself. The temptation is there and I don't know how to ask for help.

[Coffeee]

A rainy morning, another flash flood warning for my area. Yay Cali!
I'm actually up early which is quite unusual. Good thing too, I have an extremely busy day ahead of me!

Mentally I'm actually happy today which is weird cause it's early morning Monday lol.

[Unrigged64072835]

Went to T, but cut it short because the anxiety kicked in. Came home and took another Vistaril to calm down. Ended up sleeping through part of the afternoon. I may have to call the pdoc and up the Artane if this doesn't stop.

I managed to write another poem. I'll be making dinner here soon. My husband messed up on a couple of things but it's all good. I'll work around it.

My mood is still kind of down, but not as bad. I think the Latuda is preventing it from getting worse, but I keep having this anxiety.

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

I'm troubled. I'm non compliant with meds... I want to induce a hypo or manic episode just to get that high... I crave that high... I feel like a drug addict. Maybe I am. I have my Adderall from a previous Rx, and it's right there... right there... I'm so tempted to reach for it and take the whole bottle, all 27 of those pills

I was supposed to throw it away, but I can't. I can't do it.

I'm not depressed, but I feel like a lost cause. I don't know what to do with myself. The temptation is there and I don't know how to ask for help.

Acknowledgement is a great first step.

[hopeless2015]

Feeling low still, took another fmla day from work, slept most of today

[xRavenx]

Very busy day with 2 doctors appointments, a blood test, my therapy visit. I am recommended to journal daily, then bring it to her next session to help understand my train of thought when it comes to certain things. I am experiencing tremor in my hand and sometimes legs, which is getting annoying, and I am craving more food than normal. Tomorrow I will call my pdoc.

[June81280]

In bed all day.. iv been better