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#1
Feb 08, 2017, 11:07 PM
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Spent $500.00 online today...eeek. Ended up in a nearby city with a friend at a bizarre coffee/champagne sophistcated book lounge. Felt as though I was in a dream. Corriders and hidden cozy couches behind mazes of bookshelves filled with thousands of amazing books. I thought I was in a dream. I started flipping about what if I read all these books, what kind of person would I be. All these words, these letters...We stayed too long. I broke up with my bf last week-trying to stay sober-changing meds.
I started to shake. I felt like I was braking apart, into pieces. I couldn't hold myself together, overwhelmed, overstimulated, so many things going so fast in the world, I start to shake, I started to cry and my nice new friend who is also bipolar rubs my back and tells me it's ok. I tell him we have to leave. I'm losing it. We leave. I'm home now but the last time I got like this I was with my drama queen ex who flipped out which triggered me into a panic psychotic episode and off to ip. My new friend is understanding. Thank God. wtf is wrong with me. not stable |
 Anonymous45023, Daonnachd, Gabyunbound, MusicLover82, wildflowerchild25
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#2
Feb 08, 2017, 11:28 PM
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It sounds like you are in a manic episode with psychosis. I have felt similar to what you describe in the past and ended up IP for treatment, This kept me safe and brought me back to baseline. I think you urgently need to contact your pdoc and let them decide what is the best way forward from here. Medication and/or hospitalisation. For me it was a wonderfully terrifying experience. The whole world appears different and your mind is going wild and odd which makes everything almost magical and frightening. It is a good sign that you have the insight to post here and recognise something is off. It would be best to seek help now in case you lose that insight and things get worse.
Sending love and hugs.
__________________
Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD  "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
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#3
Feb 08, 2017, 11:33 PM
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You sound very unstable. If I were feeling that way, I would admit myself to the hospital. I know not everyone would, but that's just my opinion. I hope you will at least see your therapist and pdoc ASAP (call them and make an urgent appointment). Best wishes and HUGS!
__________________
...Out of night and alarm Out of terrible dreams Reach me your hand! This is the meaning that we suffered in sleep: The white peace of the waking. ~Edna St. Vincent Millay, "Song of the Nations"~ Diagnoses: Bipolar 2, OCD, Chronic Worrywart  Meds: Lithium (reducing), Trileptal, Latuda, Risperdal, Klonopin and Xanax PRN |
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#4
Feb 09, 2017, 07:06 AM
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Yes that is exactly the way I feel. I did call my t yesterday who is calling my pdoc and telling him. My t thought I was manic. I have been depressed for 6 weeks and now actually feel somewhat but somewhat not...good again? I almost hate to see pdoc. I don't want to be put on meds to be depressed again. That was worse than this. This is strange and scary but somehow exciting and intense.
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#5
Feb 09, 2017, 07:11 AM
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One good thing last night I actually slept more than 3 hours-first time in a week.
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#6
Feb 09, 2017, 07:12 AM
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Bc I took Zanax...sorry for all the posts...
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#7
Feb 09, 2017, 08:04 AM
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No need to apologize
__________________
Lactimal 175 mg Pristiq 100 mg Gabapentin 1800 mg Klonopin 1mg. Major depression Social anxiety disorder |
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