[franz kafka]

In the past 24-hours things have gotten a bit strange. I heard some Russian voices in my head and I became obsessed with the idea that Russian spies are hacking into my mind. Now walking around on campus I see people "planted" to keep an eye on me. Maybe going down to 300mg Seroquel was too low?

[Wild Coyote]

Maybe the Seroquel reduction is too low.
Sorry you are having a rough time.
Are you in touch with your pdoc?

I hope you can get a handle on this and you feel better soon.


WC

[franz kafka]

I'm getting in touch with pdoc tomorrow, right after my tdoc meeting first thing tomorrow.

I've felt the universe shift. it's like my universe, but different. It has been replaced by a nearly perfect replica, but in this new universe the rules are different. I don't know the rules yet, but I do know there is danger abound. People are keeping an eye on me. They're planted outside of shops or walking behind me at school. They want to break into my apartment and report my moves back to... to whom? Last night I heard Russian sounding voices in my head and I think they might be trying to hack into my mind. I don't know why Russian spies would be interested in my movements, but maybe that's just one of the facts about this new universe that i have to figure out. I sense signs and messages everywhere. Something simple... the yellow color of the rug in my bathroom. It's a signal. I need to interpret it. Inanimate objects speak to me with a vocabulary I barely understand. But I do need to figure out out, because the signs will tell me how I have to behave in this universe. When to eat, when to fast, who to avoid, how to act. These messages are out there waiting for me to read, and because they are meant for me i can indeed make sense of them.

I'm scared but I also feel a sense of wonder. I may have been transported to a parallel universe for which I am the center. Everything is revolving around me now. I'm destined for something here, whether it be spectacular or disastrous. I feel like standing on a soap box sharing all these thoughts but it's raining out and I don't have a soap box and I've got enough wits about me to know these are inside thoughts.

[jacky8807]

yeah I would say make it to the pdoc sooner than later it can only get worse from there

[Wild Coyote]

I hope you have been in touch with your pdoc?


WC

[Guiness187055]

Make sure to tell your pdoc everything you told us here.

[Moose72]

Print this out to share with Pdoc.

[franz kafka]

I met with tdoc this morning. She wasn't super worried and thinks this is caused by forgetting my meds once last week and getting drunk Sunday night. I feel a little less crazy today so maybe she's right? The plan is that I'll reach out to her on Friday and we'll decide if pdoc needs to be involved.

[Sunflower123]

That sounds like a good plan.

[franz kafka]

The grammar of the universe is changing. It's up to me to read the signs. Yellow things, mostly. My eye is attracted to yellow things. I don't know what they mean yet.

The change excites and terrifies me. I feel special here, at the center of things, and this intrigues me. The jabberwocky peeked out at me today before disappearing again, and that scares me.

Tdoc says I can wait a few days and hope things go back to "normal." Things must get better. I cannot go back to madness. I'm having some self-harm thoughts too but I didn't tell tdoc. They aren't strong urges and I can resist them.

[Wild Coyote]

Are you sure you don't want to call your pdoc?

Stay safe.

WC