[glowsinthedark]

is your depression always severe, or do you have episodes of mild depression as well? Sometimes I wonder if I've actually been mildly depressed for a really long time and it's just punctuated with days and weeks of severe depression...I say this because I used to be so much more motivated and excited about life. Now, even when I'm not acutely sad or hopeless, there is still this part of me that just wants the day to be over already, like I just can't break through to that other side.

[Moose72]

I was in the hospital and they said I was depressed but I didn't see it.

[LadyShadow]

I understand this. A lot of it for me has to do with being "even." As in you're not really up or down but you're not really in the middle just kind of on the low side. It's weird how this works, we get our lives together, we are stable, yet we still feel empty.

I don't know what to advise, but I know exactly what you're talking about. The only thing that I can suggest is try to find something you love, something that you always wanted to do but never did. Trying something new always helped me.

Good luck!

Yes. I have depression in varying degrees and strengths. Sometimes my depression is a physical depression....I feel my limbs are filled with lead, I have no ability to concentrate and don't even have the energy to feel sad at all. Just spent and done and out of fuel. It's not always mental or even something most people would recognize as depression, though I know now that is what it is. Then other times the depression is so consuming, I'm so sad, can't stop crying and feeling the world has chewed me up and shat me out and it looks more like what people assume depression looks like. I've been catatonic and other times screaming....it's all depression. It's never really mild but compared to how bad it can get I often describe it as such. (((Hugs)))

[Sunflower123]

I have episodes of mild depression mixed in with the severe depression. Sometimes it seems to be one long continuous cycle. I've read about many people, myself included, on this forum having trouble with motivation and excitement for life. You're not alone.

[xRavenx]

So sorry you've been feeling this way. (((hugs))). I can relate. My depressions aren't always severe. They fluctuate...sometimes being mild, moderate, or severe. They can alternate in severity week by week or every few days too.

There was a period of time this year where I had mild to moderate depression. It felt so hard to kick....as if I wasn't ever going to be content ever again. I'm just starting to break through it all. Some of my depression lifted, although I have days lately where I am irritable and angry about situational stuff, along with a little hypo mixed in. I was giving up hope....but now I see a difference in myself. I guess treatment is working more than I thought; but I know it won't be my last bout of depression. I cycle, but I've been trying to accept things better.

I believe with time, this feeling can lift for you too, and things can get better. I know how hard it can be, but treatment, hope, and self-care can go a long way.

[glowsinthedark]

thank you for sharing everyong I think I am definitely at least mildly depressed right now...I can still do what needs to be done, but I just don't really like myself and any time I think about the future I feel kind of overwhelmed and hopeless. I even found out I got an interview for this position I "really want" today, but it only lifted my mood for about 5 minutes.

Raven, I'm glad your depression is getting better. It's so easy to believe that feeling down is just "normal." It's good to be reminded that it won't always be this way.

[Victoria'smom]

Just spent and done and out of fuel

this is how my depression presents.

[scatterbrained04]

I think I've spent so much time in mild depression that it registers as being normal to me. I don't really notice anything until I'm in moderate-severe depression. Totally get what your saying. Sorry to hear you are struggling too.

[bioChE]

I know the depression of which you speak. It's a pervasive sense of being alone and as Elsa said, "out of fuel." There's a dark cloud over me that I can't seem to shake. Everything that happens in life registers somewhere other than my brain. Getting things done at work takes a tremendous amount of mental energy. Spending time with family is just putting in time, rather than being enjoyable. At least, that's the way it is for me.

At present I'm working with my psychiatrist to raise my dose of mood stabilizer. This has worked in the past, but gave me some untenable side effects. We're trying another approach. I'm hopeful that it will work to lift the continuous low mood.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by glowsinthedark

is your depression always severe, or do you have episodes of mild depression as well? Sometimes I wonder if I've actually been mildly depressed for a really long time and it's just punctuated with days and weeks of severe depression...I say this because I used to be so much more motivated and excited about life. Now, even when I'm not acutely sad or hopeless, there is still this part of me that just wants the day to be over already, like I just can't break through to that other side.

I'm going through a rather severe depression.
Even when I wasn't, I felt the zest for life was gone.
I am usually a very humorous person and my sense of humor is gone.
My pdoc says I go from feeling horrible to not so great.
So, yes, I deal with different grades of depression.


WC

[Unrigged64072835]

My depression can swing from mild to severe pretty gradually. I might not even notice it's worse because I just feel bad all the time. Right now it's rather mild, event though for the most part I'm stable. I think it has to do with it being spring and summer's around the corner.