What does trigger even mean?

Do you ever question that word? Wonder exactly how it even works? How is it related to what's going on in my head. I've recently heard a few people use this word to mean that something made them angry. That's not how I've used the word for myself. From what I know of the word, this post may be triggering. Sorry that I only seem to make post when I'm kind of down. That's when I need support the most so....

I actually thought that I was finally doing ok, that I was getting better. But lately I've just been feeling worthless, like I'm nobody. But other than that, fine. Better than before. But literally in the blink of an eye I become suicidal, or it becomes all I can think about and in that moment I feel depressed. Or I feel this need to just disappear, like a really strong urge to run away from my life and just leave it all behind. To just be alone. It's more like suicidal ideation than actually attempting to do anything. This happens to me no matter if I'm fine, happy or depressed. All it takes is for the right words to be spoken to me by the person that absolutely love the most other than my children. It happens just about Everytime there is an argument. Or even a slight annoyance or anger in his demeanor that is caused by me. He can just make me not want to exist anymore but it's more so my fault that I feel that way than his because my brain perceives things differently. It seems as if no matter what I try to do it's not good enough. I try so hard to be ok, to be normal. I find distractions but those distractions always become a problem because when you always need a distraction from your own head it starts to take over your life. Sorry I think I've gone down the rabbit hole with this post. Anyways if Im using the word trigger correctly, my husband would be a trigger for me, a huge trigger. My kids are sometimes triggering for me as well. Causing my mind to wonder to the dark side. So what does trigger mean for you? Maybe I'm looking at the word wrong. Sorry that I fell down the rabbit hole. Thanks​ for reading if you made it to the end of this.

Trigger means for me that something occurs that I then feel very upset- suicidal even. It can be something someone says or does directly to me most of the time. Often it's a memory of one of the worse times that retriggers me.

trigger, for me, means a series of words (or events), that disturbs your emotional state at the time.
I know for me, 1 of my biggist triggers is family, and when ever they are mentioned or talked about, it unsettles me and makes me feel unstable (not because of chemicals or anything like that, because family was mentioned)

perhaps an easier way to look at it is to think of people with PTSD

what triggers (starts off), their bad emotional reactions

events/ traumas from their past.

that's why they have it in the first place, because they've witnessed something that was traumatic for them
so if you try to look at it from that point of view, and then apply it to us, it works exactly the same.

family is a trigger for me because my mother abused me and cut me out of her life, so naturally when ever family is mentioned, it starts off a neggative reaction

triggers can be anything though. sounds, smells, looking at things, certain people in the room, another one for me is a baby crying.

you can also get good triggers. like, 1 of my good triggers is watching the disney movie the lion king. it makes me feel good, and makes me feel safe

I understand where you are coming from. The previous posters have good definitions of what trigger means. I have a family member that whenever I get into a fight with, my thoughts automatically go to SI. I'm working on that.

Best wishes.

Thank you all for your responses.

I'm sorry your husband is a trigger for you.
I hope you can discuss this with him and find a way to heal this.
If you both need help with this, couple's counseling is an option.
I wish you well.

WC

I have told him that he's a trigger. I don't think he 100% understands and I know he doesn't know the thoughts that are happening inside my head or how it affects the way I feel. I guess I could try talking to him more about it. I've tried getting him to maybe see a therapist for anger and irritability because I think he'd benefit from it. He is in the army and after coming home from his deployment he's quicker to anger and is way less patient. That was like 2 yrs ago.

The military may have some resources for couples?
I think many military spouses suffer from irritability and stress-related behaviors. (I'm not excusing this, I just think they may have some resources for you both?)

Often times, though not always, loved ones will curb certain behaviors once they have insight into how their behaviors adversely affect someone they care about. It may not do any harm to talk with him more, or do you feel that's too risky?


WC

Triggers can be anything from sights, sounds, smells, touch or taste. If I'm triggered I can get angry, sad, hopeless, panicked or terrorized completely with all this emotions at once along with extreme paranoia or in some cases delusions. Triggers are of course unique and how we respond, feel or present is very individual.

I hope you get to the bottom of yours and get the help you need. My husband means well but he certainly has been a contributor to triggering me. (((Hugs to you)))

"Trigger" for me can be just talking to people. I don't relate it to anger - with me it's that I become sort of over-stimulated. It happens with listening to music too - I have gone from listening to something good while I'm online to being quite manic.

I think trigger can mean different things to different people, which is why I'm not a fan of the word because it's so non-specific; it can be something or someone or a situation that makes you sad, or annoyed, or angry, or lowers your self esteem, etc. I don't think all 'triggers' result in BP episodes. They can, perhaps more frequently, be interpersonal in nature and lead to the feelings above, including SI.

I think therapy can potentially help us notice when these situations arise and teach us how to deal with them. Good luck on your journey!