[tecomsin]

Bipolar I, II, III, IV with or without psychosis and/or Schizoaffective Disorder are such complicated syndromes or illnesses with many symptoms that vary in time. They are just plain weird among all medical diagnoses because of this variationand each person's illness can be quite different to any one elses, plus each person's subjective experience can be different too, so I'm curious to know how other people rank their symptoms, subjectively from worst to least bothersome. It doesn't matter how frequent they are, all that matters is how you see it.

To start, my ranking is
1. delusions
2. panic attacks
3. anxiety
4. mania
5. depression

As of the past 6 months? Some depression after the suicide of my nephew, and a month ago briefly, but otherwise almost no symptoms, except occasional anxiety that can be managed/extinguished with Ativan and/or coping tools.

Worst overall in my life?

1. Delusions of persecution (psychosis)
2. Mania with mixed features
3.Anxiety stuff (general, agoraphobia, panic attacks)
4.Depression
5. Mania, elated
6. Hallucinations (psychosis)
7. Hypomania, irritable type
8. Depersonalization and/or Derealization
9.Hypomania, elated type

I have bipolar type 1. The very worst and traumatic episodes of my life were the manias with mixed and sometimes anxious features. They were the most dangerous for me and often included delusions of persecution. Frightening, grueling, torture!

I believe I had a full blown manic episode twice at 15 and 24, but they were short lasting, and only the first included mixed features and was somewhat traumatic. My psychiatrist and I believe my most dominant (long-lasting) episodes in my youth were clearly hypomanias, mostly elated, but with intermittent anger outbursts. I feel like I've spent more time hypomanic than anything in my life, though the ratio of depressions to hypomanias to manias changed after age 34. My rough guess of the ratios are as follows:

Ages ? or 15 to 34--- D8:H30:M2

Ages 34 to 46---D25:H5:M10 (with 7 of this 10 w/mixed features)

Does the above make any sense?

Anxiety has been an issue a lot in my life, but not always. I could have anxiety during any type of episode or alone, or have episodes or stability without it.

[raspberrytorte]

Anxiety (though this hasn't been so bad since I was put back on klonopin)
Psychosis/paranoia/delusions
mixed mania
euphoric mania
depression

[99fairies]

1-anxiety and panic attacks.
2-psychosis
3- full blown mania
4-depression

[wildflowerchild25]

Psychosis and unrelenting suicidal thoughts.

Edit: and crushing social anxiety.

[Guiness187055]

1. full on mania
2. anxiety panic attacks
3. depression
4. psychosis
5. hypo mania

[HALLIEBETH87]

1-psychosis
2-suicidal depression
3-panic
4-mania

[taybaby]

1 - Psychosis and derealization
2 - Paranoia, anxiety, panic attacks (they happen together usually)
3 - Suicidal Depression
4 - Irritable hypomania
5 - Elated hypomania

[VerMOZZica]

1. Deep,dark depression
2.Racing thoughts
3.Irritable hypomania
4.Anxiety and panic attacks

[Aliceiw]

1. Seeing what isn't there
(nothing scarier in this world)
2. Paranoia anxiety
3. Random suicide commands
(weird to explain and distressing when you don't particularly feel depressed)
4. Panic attacks
(Not being able to breathe, weight on your chest)
5. Depression vulnerability
(when everything makes you cry, even nothing at all)
6. Irritability
(When you feel angry at everything but also guilty at acting like a basket case)

[hinzc7711]

1. Social anxiety

2. Sense of mind spinning (mania)

3. Anxiety attacks

4. Depression

5. Retreat

1. imsomnia

2. pannic attacks/ anxiety

3. irritibility

4. depression

5. problems focussing

6. mania (especially at school)

7. self- harming

8. violent helusinations

Agitation
Paranoia
Impulsivity
Racing thoughts
Suicidality

[BipolaRNurse]

1) Suicidal depression
2) Mixed features
3) Paranoia/delusions
4) Intense anger
5) Agitation

[liveforsummer]

Suicidal thoughts
Self harm
Anxiety/worry
Insomnia
Depression
Mixed episodes

No specific order. They all suck.

[winter loneliness]

Depression
mixed episodes
Irritability/anger
paranoia
apathy
self esteem issues, switching between depressed low to manic high
ADD symptoms

Originally Posted by tecomsin

Bipolar I, II, III, IV with or without psychosis and/or Schizoaffective Disorder are such complicated syndromes or illnesses with many symptoms that vary in time. They are just plain weird among all medical diagnoses because of this variationand each person's illness can be quite different to any one elses, plus each person's subjective experience can be different too, so I'm curious to know how other people rank their symptoms, subjectively from worst to least bothersome. It doesn't matter how frequent they are, all that matters is how you see it.

To start, my ranking is
1. delusions
2. panic attacks
3. anxiety
4. mania
5. depression

1. Mania
2. Anxiety
3. Hallucinations
4. Delusions
5. Depression
6. Mania
7. Mania
8. Mania

I’ve been riding the mania train for many months. Never really full-blown? A manic continuum? No more than two-three symptoms at one time. I usually like the delusions but hallucinations scare me. Delusional, I create a reality of a warm and acceptable home and friends and family - all of whom are dead. It feels wonderful there, like being in the middle of the very finest Rio carnival. In depression, I doubt myself, I think that I can never be happy. Holidays. My friends have families and spend traditional family-oriented holidays with, well, families. I spend holidays alone. I become horrified. I will never have a family, again. Depression creeps and seeps over and into me and I think of the lost and the dead and all of those that I will never see again.

I believe that death is a finality and have no reason to believe in any sort of afterlife no matter how attractive the mythical promises.

My primary lover, my girlfriend, is asleep beside me. I feel the heat of her body. I feel good tonight. I feel okay. Fine. Good.

[~Christina]

Rage
Insomnia
Psychosis
Suicidal thoughts
Angry mania
Agitation
Depression

(whole lot of anger)

[Tucson]

Mania
Depression
Anxiety
Cognitive defecits IMO related to my MI

I have been asymptomatic, with respect to mania, for several years now. However, when I was in the middle of it, I went through large sums of money which left me indigent. I never ever want to do this to myself again. So my two top problems now are depression and anxiety.

[Javajer]

I'm bipaolar 1.
Anxiety (gad) panic disorder
Paranoid delusional disorder.
Adhd inattentive type
Effector 300mg.
Abilify 5 mg. Soon going up.
I'm new to forums. Just diagnosed 3 months ago

[annielovesbacon]

1. Severe depression
2. Suicidal thoughts
3. Relapsing with eating disorder
4. Relapsing with substance abuse
5. Panic attacks
6. General anxiety
7. Hypomania

1. Depression - sometimes I go for years between depressive episodes; my last one started in 2011 and ended around April 2016 (though I was in a mixed state on and off during this depressive episode)--I have compulsive suicidal thoughts and feel like no one could possibly endure the sorry, boring worthless person I have become--I want to hide. I feel to numb to connect to people. Sex is blah. My depressive periods are why I have no friends because I would stop making phone calls, replying to letters and emails, really, just avoid people as much as possible because I knew I was not very enjoyable to be with. I hate this state so much and always feel so elated and grateful when it ends.
2. Anxiety/insomnia - when I can't sleep because I can't stop myself from compulsive worrying - I no longer drink but this was when it would be very tempting to drink whatever alcohol was in the house (Beer or wine--I rarely bought hard liquor that I liked--H used to sometimes have some good scotch around--I do not like scotch).
3. Hypomania/irritability.
4. Hypomania/extreme happiness - I like this state but it can sometimes be annoying for others.
5. Paranoia - happens occassionally to me but usually based on a grain of truth (Example, if my husband monitored what I wrote on PC then he must be monitoring everything--who has time to monitor you 24 hours a day?; if someone is smoking pot they might be using harder drugs!--no, most pot smokers do not use heroin, but these are the types of conclusions I can't shake sometimes.).

[xRavenx]

1. Racing/intrusive thoughts with paranoid delusions (associated with mixed mania)
2. Severe anxiety and agitation
3. Crippling depression, with isolation, low self-worth, and crying spells
4. Manic impulsivity and self-destructive actions
5. Irritability with anger
6. Insomnia/lack of sleep (causes a lot of the above).

More, but those are 6 that come to mind as really bad. It's hard to put them in order completely, since sometimes one leads to another.