Anger and seeing red

*I wrote this in coping with emotions but think you guys might understand me better*

I had a great day really relaxed then at night something inside me snapped. My Sister and I were talking about her and her boyfriend and I said things about her relationship as she wanted me to be honest. She didn't like it then we fought real bad like we were teenagers again. I stormed out the room she followed then it escalated. She cornered me on the stairs I started seeing red explained this to her but she won't let up. Kept shouting at me. I was 6 stairs ahead of her and went to kick her in the face. She grabbed me and I fell into her. We scraped for a wee bit then she saw red. Was going mad. We were both in tears. I really thought about hurting her so badly. She made me claustrophobic, anxious, scared and I was panicking. It took us an hour to calm down. She was not going to leave me in case I hurt myself. I have never done anything after a fight. She says it was like we were 14 again and this is why she hated me growing up. Said i was a freak and a weirdo. I don't blame her.... I am. I hate myself for getting angry but she wasntvlistening and was making the situation worse.

Sorry this happened.

If she wanted you to be honest, she shouldn't have flipped out IMO. She has the right to feel hurt inside, but she doesn't have the right to harass you like that. I personally think she should have accepted the opinion as an opinion and used it as a deciding factor with what to do about her boyfriend. There's no point in asking for an honest opinion if you're not willing to accept something you don't want to hear.

You are not a freak or a weirdo. You are a person with feelings who was trying to do the right thing for her. There is nothing freakish or weird about your help. And I personally don't think anyone can be freakish or a weirdo for fighting, even if you fought for many years.

I have had my mother follow me when I left the room to cool down and then I blew up at her. It never became physical, but she hadn’t respected my boundaries and I reacted poorly to it.

The only ones that stretch my boundaries are my dogs. And my wife.
And a neighboor that has a white light in his dock bothering my eyes in the lanai.
My new dock is coming. And I designed it tilted toward his house. Sixteen poles full of Superwhite LEDs spotlights. Let's see who surrenders first.
The sad part is that he doesn't even know how much his light bothers me. He will.

that rage inside that just wants an excuse to come out is all too familiar for me ... I have no advise just that you are not alone ... if it makes you a freak then I guess we both are ... sorry your being dragged thru this ... Love ..Tigger .

I'm so sorry this fight between you and your sis happened. That kind of event is so troubling and upsetting.

Can you relax somewhat today? Take deep breaths and feel calm?

One more question...are you having other anger episodes these days? If so, it can be a symptom of a manic episode, as you probably know.

My late husband used to do this to me. Just never leave me alone even when I said I was getting too angry. It never got physical but I screamed at him and said horrible things I wouldn’t have said if he had respected my boundaries and let me calm down. You’re not a freak or a weirdo.

When I was growing up and we'd argue, my mother would not leave me alone. I would beg her for some space so I could collect myself, ground myself, and have a fresh perspective. No way...she could not let things go.

Hey I just feel guilty now. I want to buy her things to make up for it. I'm more irritable now a days but not full blown angervlike Saturday

I really don’t think you need to do that. I would avoid spending money, esp. if you might not be yourself.

If you really want to do something, why not have a talk or send a card.