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#1
Aug 01, 2018, 04:12 AM
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I'm useless at picking up my signals. You think after 8 years I would have a clue.
- Lack of sleep (have been getting to sleep at 3am even though in bed at 12am and waking 5am or 6am. That's me up. But at night I'm wide awake) - Still not much energy to do squat. I'm happy sitting in my flat doing nothing - Talking to myself I have a habit if talking to people I see in the flat - Wanting to eat loads - OCD tendencies are in full swing (hand washing, sorting and counting) - I'm glued to YouTube addicted to music videos watching the same over again - Thinking about sex a lot - Wanting to talk to anyone all the time. Reaching out on messenger on fb. - Looking up bipolar and reading about it kinda fixated on it like YouTube - Noted the bullet and emailed a counsellor the other day. I have an appt next week as an initial appt. Been looking into this for a month - ok I'll admit it I've stopped my meds (stopped them about a month ago. I don't need them) - Questioning my diagnosis - Feel itchy at night and feel like things are crawling over me - Anxieties are through the roof - Maybe spending more money than I should ie this counsellor - Happy - Seeking out interaction via online forums that I shouldn't be on (kinky) Think that's it.... I'm seeing my Community Worker in 3 hours. Linda unsure what to say to her Think that's it. |
 liveforsummer, Movingon69, Wild Coyote
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 Wild Coyote
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#2
Aug 01, 2018, 05:30 AM
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tell Linda the exact same thing you typed out here
__________________
"Perhaps strength doesn't reside in having never been broken but in the courage required to grow strong in the broken places." ― Carine McCandless. - Bipolar 2, GAD, ADHD - Geodon, Lexapro, Trleptal, Vyvanse, Hydroxyzine, Clonazepam prn |
| Wild Coyote
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| BipolaRNurse, Miss Laura, Wild Coyote
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#3
Aug 01, 2018, 06:00 AM
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Oh ok.... she'll think I should of contacted the crisis team but I don't think I'm in crisis. She'll tell me to go back on my meds and will be pissed at me for coming off them. She will not be happy with me. Plus I meet her in a cafe so it's really hard to talk about this sort of thing. I joined a website and I'm seeking kinky behaviour argghh!
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| Wild Coyote
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| Wild Coyote
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#4
Aug 01, 2018, 07:03 AM
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Well seeking kinky behavior is not a bad or wrong thing (being in a kinky lifestyle myself) as long as it is done in a sane, safe and consensual manner....she will tell you to go back on meds and wont be happy about your choice but she needs to know or it is pointless to meet with her and utilize her services.
__________________
"Perhaps strength doesn't reside in having never been broken but in the courage required to grow strong in the broken places." ― Carine McCandless. - Bipolar 2, GAD, ADHD - Geodon, Lexapro, Trleptal, Vyvanse, Hydroxyzine, Clonazepam prn |
| Wild Coyote
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| Miss Laura, Wild Coyote
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#5
Aug 01, 2018, 04:13 PM
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Could be a mixed episode too. Have you contacted your pdoc?
__________________
Bipolar 1, PTSD, anorexia, panic disorder, ADHD Seroquel, Cymbalta, propanolol, buspirone, Trazodone, gabapentin, lamotrigine, hydroxyzine, There's a crack in everything. That is how the light gets in. --Leonard Cohen |
| Wild Coyote
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| Miss Laura, Wild Coyote
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#6
Aug 01, 2018, 06:13 PM
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I see my Psychiatrist on 6th August I haven't seen him in 6 months. So I gave a lot to tell him I normally go in say I'm fine and walk out of appt 10 mins later. But not this appt.
I spoke to my Worker and she's concerned. I'm questioning the Bipolar and the paranoia is bad re it and life in general. I'm worried about risky behaviour I just want this attention even though I don't want sex I want sex if you get me |
| Anonymous45023, Wild Coyote
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| Wild Coyote
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#7
Aug 01, 2018, 07:15 PM
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Just be honest and catch whatever before you have regrets.
__________________
Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
| Wild Coyote
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| Miss Laura, Wild Coyote
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#8
Aug 01, 2018, 10:31 PM
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Please stay safe.
 WC
__________________
May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths. 
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| Miss Laura
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#9
Aug 02, 2018, 04:02 AM
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Thanks guys. I'm stressing about seeing Psychiatrist though this is a massive appt for me
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#10
Aug 02, 2018, 11:57 AM
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I woke up today feeling absolutely and utter rubbish. I have the biggest hangover ever and it's not due to alcohol. I think the lack of sleep is catching up on me and I'm paying for it big time. My friend was peeved with me cause I never told her I was off my meds. What's it to her? Why is she annoyed like she could do anything she's a liability in many areas. I'm really irritable at her. She's moaning at me cause I'm off my meds she knows nothing. She is the one who said I have Schizophrenia cause I am psychotic at the moment. She doesn't know what she's talking about. I'm so tired but its 6pm so no point in snoozing
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#11
Aug 02, 2018, 06:56 PM
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(((((((((Miss Laura)))))))))
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| Miss Laura
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#12
Aug 02, 2018, 09:22 PM
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The symptoms you’re describing sounds very concerning. Be safe
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| Wild Coyote
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| Miss Laura
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#13
Aug 03, 2018, 02:22 AM
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I'm just stressed out with my head. There is never a clear cut answer with Bipolar. I know logically I need meds so in my heart I know I need them but in my head it's like f@@@ that for a laugh not happening. I'm getting higher I feel. A friend thinks I'm depressed as I said life isn't worth it anymore I lose at life. I don't feel depressed though
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| Anonymous45023, Wild Coyote
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#14
Aug 05, 2018, 04:56 AM
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I'm thinking of sex constantly... I'm speaking to these guys online and I'm Skype 2 of them tonight. If I could of chatted to them today I would but I'm at my parents house. I was at s family party last night and said things about my Dad that is gonna cause trouble but I'm concerned he's not coping with my Mum. My Aunt is going to talk to my Uncle and get him to talk to my Dad. Families!
I'm itching to meet these guys. I know it's unrealistic as some live in America and I'm in Scotland. I really wanted to get wasted last night at the party. I had 6 alcoholic drinks and was fine. I wanted to drink more though. A friend says it's dangerous as I'm not well and adding alcohol into the mix isn't going to help. But what does she know? She's irritating me. Constantly saying things like this. |
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