[Miss Laura]

I have met with a much older guy today. I don't want sex and that's fine with him. He enjoys playing and that's fine with me.

I only ever do things like this when I'm Hypo or Manic. But I feel fine. I don't feel too happy etc. I'm excited but nothing major. I'm still having depression at the moment... not wanting to do anything, indecisivness, missing things I should be going to

Is this a stress thing for me as I have had to deal with family issues (Mum's stroke in Nov and Dad breaking his wrist in Dec both were in hospital and Mum still is). Christmas, my CPN (Community Psychiatric Nurse) leaving, not seeing another nurse until end of May. Ok I have to admit I have stopped my meds again. I just don't need them anymore. I have no symptoms really. Other than the meet up today and depression which I had when on the meds

Am I heading manic?

[Daonnachd]

How long ago did you stop your meds?

[Miss Laura]

Well tbh I haven't been on them since Nov 21st. But I went back on them 8th March but came off them start of April ish. I don't know why I can't take my meds. I just have difficulty staying in routine to take them

[Fuzzybear]

I have no opinions on meds. (Or rather I’m not sharing them here, other than for me personally I’d prefer to take the lowest dose possible.. for all sorts of reasons)..But it sounds to me that you’re “doing ok” - my paws are crossed for you

[Wild Coyote]

Miss Laura!

It's good to hear from you.

Since you don't see any other signs of mania at this point, maybe just keep a close eye on things? Do any of you IRL friends see any other signs right now?

You can also keep checking in here, describing what's going on and asking for feedback, just as you are doing today.

I understand you've been depressed. Me, too. I hope all else is going as well as possible.


WC

[Miss Laura]

I haven't seen friends in like 2 months. I don't like bugging them. So I haven't told them I have stopped my meds and saw this guy and now I have gave my number to another guy. I feel obliged to talk to these guys and I am very excitable at the moment. I came home tonight and was very excited to check my emails and send texts to these guys. I got a little bit peed off as no-one was chatting to me out of 7 guys i am speaking to only 1 is chatting. I'm quite irrated but hey ho.

I feel if I tell my friends they will say I'm ill. But I don't really feel it

[Wild Coyote]

Are your friend quite accurate when they feel you are ill?

You seem concerned and your own concern counts!

Please take care!


WC

[Miss Laura]

Sometimes their right but not all the time. They said I was in crisis a few months ago so made me call my team. I called them and they said I was fine just a little hypo manic. That's when u 're started the meds but have been unsuccessful

[Miss Laura]

I'm hyper and have been told by my sister I'm being too loud. I'm normally quite quiet. I feel fine though but I'm chatting to more guys now. I'm definetly not in crisis. I'm thinking I'm just happy?

[*Laurie*]

I'm not sure what kind of answer you're looking for. I'd be excited if I met a guy with whom I had a connection, too. I think it's okay if you're hypomanic. It's really not possible for me to tell whether you need meds, or not. Do you think you do?

[~Christina]

Hey there

Maybe you need a different med????

Hypo is fun but Manic usually winds up a crash and burn then you have to make amends to everyone you left in the path of destruction towards hell..

Have you in the past juggled a couple guys at once? If not then maybe that your sign that you need to be proactive in gathering yourself up again..

Stay safe

Lack of insight is a problem with being bipolar. If people around you are saying you’re not yourself, check in with the psychiatrist to be assessed.

That isn’t going to hurt you. Ignoring it could.

[Miss Laura]

I'm not seeing my Psychiatrist until 6th Aug. I see my Community Nurse 30th of May. I normally chat to men online and in person via phone when manic. The guys are 10-30 years older than me. Sex is off the cards if we meet up. One guy in England wants to come up to Scotland to see me. He called tonight and left a voicemail. He wants to come up. I'm seeing an older guy on Thurs to fool about with. As I say sex is off the cards.

I'm itching to buy things but I'm being so good. I did spend £260 on Amazon but £100 is for my Mum buying her a new kindle. I'm buying things that have been in my basket for months

My head is quite busy but when I go to write it is in a fog. I'm not really eating I went 2 days without good then bunged on rubbish today

Strange men for private meet ups? That doesn’t sound safe.

You sound hypomanic. Why don’t you call the doc.

[Miss Laura]

Yeah I chat to them online.... it kinda feels right. One came to my house on Thurs and meeting him again next Thurs. He's nice.

Everything is shut i think as it's a public holiday here. I'm seeing my Community Worker on Wed though

[*Laurie*]

I don't find anything wrong with meeting the guys, do whatever, but I would suggest you do so some place besides a private home. Manic or not, that's a dangerous thing to do until you know the person, meet others who know him, and so on.

[Fuzzybear]

6th August ....

Good old uk

Originally Posted by Miss Laura

I'm not seeing my Psychiatrist until 6th Aug. I see my Community Nurse 30th of May. I normally chat to men online and in person via phone when manic. The guys are 10-30 years older than me. Sex is off the cards if we meet up. One guy in England wants to come up to Scotland to see me. He called tonight and left a voicemail. He wants to come up. I'm seeing an older guy on Thurs to fool about with. As I say sex is off the cards.

I'm itching to buy things but I'm being so good. I did spend £260 on Amazon but £100 is for my Mum buying her a new kindle. I'm buying things that have been in my basket for months

My head is quite busy but when I go to write it is in a fog. I'm not really eating I went 2 days without good then bunged on rubbish today

[*Laurie*]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

6th August ....

Good old uk

Eh, pretty much the same in many places in the States. Depends, really, upon where one is located and what type of insurance is involved.

[Miss Laura]

I haven't seen Psych since 30th Jan. I'm now down to 6 monthly visits. I should of been seeing a CPN but mines retired in February. But eventually I have one for 30th May. I can't talk to my Community Worker about things as we go to a cafe for lunch and I don't feel comfortable talking about me outside I'm paranoid people are listening in on our conversation

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by Miss Laura

I haven't seen Psych since 30th Jan. I'm now down to 6 monthly visits. I should of been seeing a CPN but mines retired in February. But eventually I have one for 30th May. I can't talk to my Community Worker about things as we go to a cafe for lunch and I don't feel comfortable talking about me outside I'm paranoid people are listening in on our conversation

I’m surprised if anyone thinks this level of “care” is adequate. It sucks

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by key tones

Strange men for private meet ups? That doesn’t sound safe.

You sound hypomanic. Why don’t you call the doc.

Not sure that calling the doc is an option in this forest, the pdoc is “protected” by gatekeepers, G.P’s, “care co ordinators” etc ..

[*Laurie*]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

I’m surprised if anyone thinks this level of “care” is adequate. It sucks

Oh, it's horrid. It sounds like the medical care system in the UK is as broken as ours in the States. A mess, really.

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Not sure that calling the doc is an option in this forest, the pdoc is “protected” by gatekeepers, G.P’s, “care co ordinators” etc ..

[Miss Laura]

A guy I have been speaking to.... today told me he had kids young kids wtf. Anyways we have been chatting for 2 weeks. He has bugged me to send him a pic of me so I did but he refused to send me his pic double standards? Anyways he knows what I look like and my name. He has now tonight after 3 days of ignoring me said he doesn't see us having a thing cause...... I'm too big. What a f***ing arsehole. I'm raging. What a f***ing ****

Another guy came over today to fool around. He wants to move things into the bedroom next visit which is meant to be on Thurs. I'm nervous. I don't know if I can move into the bedroom. I'm thinking of cancelling Thurs???

I'm so excited though.

[5150DirtDiva]

I am going to say it. I will chat with many guys when I am manic too. But seeing, in person, several of them, sex or not, is getting a bit reckless, don't you think? I am not judging you, I am just concerned how well you know them and I do not want you to get hurt.