[Tucson]

I have been hypomanic for maybe a week. I am now starting to do “crazy” things which is unlike me even when hypomanic. I think I am losing my mind.

For instance, I was at the teller window at a bank behind my ex girlfriend who was waiting in line. When one teller looked at me, I smiled and told her that I am now an old man. I am actually 59. I have this watch that has BIG numbers so I can see them. Then I said “See?”. On my tippy toes I wrenched my wrist around in order to try to show them the big numbers on my wrist watch. Of course they could not see anything from that distance. All they would do is look down and smile allot. I think this is part of my hypomania. But hey, my ex girlfriend looked down and stifled a laugh. Do you think she was embarrassed?

What do you think? I just found myself doing this.

[SorryShaped]

Were you maybe trying to be cute for your ex, though fumbling a bit?

[Movingon69]

Originally Posted by Tucson

I have been hypomanic for maybe a week. I am now starting to do “crazy” things which is unlike me even when hypomanic. I think I am losing my mind.

For instance, I was at the teller window at a bank behind my ex girlfriend who was waiting in line. When one teller looked at me, I smiled and told her that I am now an old man. I am actually 59. I have this watch that has BIG numbers so I can see them. Then I said “See?”. On my tippy toes I wrenched my wrist around in order to try to show them the big numbers on my wrist watch. Of course they could not see anything from that distance. All they would do is look down and smile allot. I think this is part of my hypomania. But hey, my ex girlfriend looked down and stifled a laugh. Do you think she was embarrassed?

What do you think? I just found myself doing this.

Have you seen anyone about getting the hypo under control? It is hard to say. I don't think this example on its own is evidence of moving towards more of a manic state. Hope you feel better soon

[UpDownAround]

I am also 59, also have a watch with big numbers and also do that sort of stuff sometimes. I am somewhat socially inept. But that can come and go in waves. I do think that being medicated causes me to sometimes have ups and downs to lesser degrees and sometimes I question things I do or say the same way you wonder about this.

[*Laurie*]

Here's a thought. I'm not so sure it's the actual "watch showing" is indicative of escalating mania, but ruminating on the incident could be.

[Tucson]

Maybe part of the reason was for my ex. I like to make her laugh. However, it is always strictly through conversation. I do not act the way I did at the bank. I was not thinking much about what I was doing. It kind of just happened. Only later did I realize what I had done. It was a very uncharacteristic, implusive thing for me to do.

Lately I have become an agressive driver, hypersexual, and now compulsively starting to spend money that I do not have to spend. These are typical symptoms for me. I have been staying up to the early hours of the monrning, and then getting up in one case 3 1/2 hours later. The part I do not understand is that I still can be depressed in the morning. I also have been finding myself gesticulating energetically when I talk. This is new for me. I do not have the racing thoughts yet. I have been at times I have been much more agressive online. I think this is enthusiasm, but some may call it something different.

I think I have mentioned this elsewhere, that I have actually been frequenting a dating site that is used by people who lets say are very adventurous in and out of bed. The sex some get involved in is way over the top. This is the first time I have done this. Normally I would consider these people doing things that are “crazy” bordering on the bizzare, and avoid the website. There are even people much older than I participating in this website.

[*Laurie*]

Hmm. Your description does sound unusual for you. When will you see your pdoc next?

[Tucson]

My appointment is three weeks from now. I am having a problem focusing on doing anything today, on following through. I did exercise in the morning. I missed my pdoc appointment earlier in the morning. Figures. The pdoc took me off of my AP. I have no idea why. I am on a MS, but I have been placed on a low dose of it, perhaps too low. I will need to go to that public mental health facility that I go to in order to get more scripts.

[*Laurie*]

Three weeks is a long wait. I'm sure most pdocs are used to patients missing appointments now and then. Can you contact yours this week, maybe?

[Tucson]

One thing about public facilities is the lack of money, many poorly paid “green horn” pdocs, and high case load. They will not permit me to see my pdoc until my appointment. The pdocs are protected in this way so they can see their patients on their overloaded schedules. One time I had to throw a royal fit to get attention. They just sent an email to the doctor which hopefully he would check before the end of the day. Then I waited there all day in hopes that he can see me. This only happens if someone else misses their appointment. I even periodically sent in the pdocs medical assistant to harass him for a decision. This did not work.

I need to get new scripts. So three times a week, I can go in with the date of my next appointment to get new scripts to see me over to that time. If I had to, this is when I can throw another fit, working to convince the prescribing nurse that I desperately need a med adjustment. They normally do not do this. My fear is that they may obsolve themselves of their responsibilities by referring me to a psych hospital. If this works out, they will go to the pdocs office for a consult, which then is when he may authorize a med change.

[*Laurie*]

Originally Posted by Tucson

One thing about public facilities is the lack of money, many poorly paid “green horn” pdocs, and high case load. They will not permit me to see my pdoc until my appointment. The pdocs are protected in this way so they can see their patients on their overloaded schedules. One time I had to throw a royal fit to get attention. They just sent an email to the doctor which hopefully he would check before the end of the day. Then I waited there all day in hopes that he can see me. This only happens if someone else misses their appointment. I even periodically sent in the pdocs medical assistant to harass him for a decision. This did not work.

I need to get new scripts. So three times a week, I can go in with the date of my next appointment to get new scripts to see me over to that time. If I had to, this is when I can throw another fit, working to convince the prescribing nurse that I desperately need a med adjustment. They normally do not do this. My fear is that they may obsolve themselves of their responsibilities by referring me to a psych hospital. If this works out, they will go to the pdocs office for a consult, which then is when he may authorize a med change.

Yep. You've described the "clinic psychiatry" situation well. I also go to a clinic, and experience the same type of structure. In addition, there is no way to contact my pdoc after hours or even during clinic hours. It's entirely up to the receptionist - and all she'll do is make an appointment for me weeks out.

[yellow_fleurs]

Originally Posted by Tucson

One thing about public facilities is the lack of money, many poorly paid “green horn” pdocs, and high case load. They will not permit me to see my pdoc until my appointment. The pdocs are protected in this way so they can see their patients on their overloaded schedules. One time I had to throw a royal fit to get attention. They just sent an email to the doctor which hopefully he would check before the end of the day. Then I waited there all day in hopes that he can see me. This only happens if someone else misses their appointment. I even periodically sent in the pdocs medical assistant to harass him for a decision. This did not work.

I need to get new scripts. So three times a week, I can go in with the date of my next appointment to get new scripts to see me over to that time. If I had to, this is when I can throw another fit, working to convince the prescribing nurse that I desperately need a med adjustment. They normally do not do this. My fear is that they may obsolve themselves of their responsibilities by referring me to a psych hospital. If this works out, they will go to the pdocs office for a consult, which then is when he may authorize a med change.

This sounds incredibly frustrating to deal with. There should be someone you can contact for these types of things. I get that it's hard if they have a high case load, but it still seems like there should be an option for urgent situations. Hope you can get some help soon.