Experiencing hypomania because of new job...

No irritability and enjoying my coworkers so far. I was on disabililty earlier this year but because I lost it--when I was offered a full time temporary job, I took it.

Perhaps my transportation arrangements are fueling my hypomania. My husband drives to work at 6:20 AM for a 7 AM - 3 PM job. We only have one car and because he makes 5X more per hour than I do with my new job--I am working around his schedule (he doesn't want me to work if it causes any problems ). So, I get up and usually make us breakfast and a lunch for us to take to work. Then he loads my bike into the bed of his truck. There is a bus stop near his workplace where I load my bike. When I get off that bus route, it is a 1.5 mile bike ride to work. I get there about 45 minutes before my 8:30 AM shift. When I get out of work at 5:30 PM, I ride my bike 4 miles to a different bus stop which takes me to a spot that is 3 miles from my home resulting in arriving at home between 7:05 and 7:20 PM.

I actually enjoy all the bike riding but the problem is that by 8 PM, my husband is ready for bed but when I lie down--I am still wound up. Before adopting this schedule, I only took my xanax about 3X a week--now I am taking it every evening and still wound up. This morning, a severe leg cramp in my right calf woke me up at 1 AM (I am still wide awake). No big deal today since it is Saturday but this is the 2nd time this week.

Perhaps the hypomania will go away once the job becomes routine? Do you think I have taken on a schedule that is incompatable with my bipolar II traits (noticed earlier this year that this is one of my diagnosis but GAD/panic disorder is the bigger concern--the diagnosis which is rock solid. ) Unless I totally crash--I plan on sticking to this schedule since the job only lasts until mid or early December......

Just realized this is unfair. I'm the one that has been insisting that the bike ride is relaxing, it takes the place of our daily walk, etc. He would have me drive and drop him off if I requested it. I am only say things like this about my husband and friend who I spend all my nonwork time with. He is very good to me so the comments are very unfair. Is this a symptom of anxiety (about his reactions that I imagine and get anxious anticipating), bipolar, or a personality disorder. This is why I shouldn't post on PC. I feel like I just bad mouthed him on here this morning then made him breakfast followed by relaxing quality time.

((((((((( hugs )))))))))

It's good that you're getting all this exercise, but I hope the hypomania doesn't get worse. You might want to talk to your doctor about it.

I don’t want to talk to my doctor, most of them over here are full of ****

Good point. If it doesn't settle down by Tuesday evening--I will message her. In the meantime, I woke up at 1 or 2 AM all week and still feeling good so far today.

Well, I slept more than seven hours last night but them my back went out shortly after getting up. Probably will be walking instead of riding my bike this week. I am used to long walks and loading the bike on the bus rack has been a challenge....

Is there any way your hubby could drop you off and pick you up at work some or all of your work days? Would you consider asking someone at your work place that lives near you if you could be picked up and returned home for some gas money and a little extra, at least a couple days per week?

On Friday, one of my classmates (I am in training at the new job) thought it was awesome that I was riding my bike there (I was bragging that the weather was perfect for it). Today will be a big contrast since I will be walking around stooped and in pain whenever I move--especially going from standing to sitting and vice versa.

My sweet husband and daughter did everything for me yesterday (I mostly binged watched Mad Men and NFL games)--I could cook but only if people assisted with cleaning the iron skillet (hurt my back to move) and picking things up that are higher our lower than chest or waist level. My H will be driving me and picking me up from work today. Until my back heals, I can only walk slowly, but it will heal. It has been a long time since it has gone out this badly, but it has before. I am glad that I have this job. Going to class and operating a mouse/keybourd is the one thing I can do....

When my back starts going out I’m way too stressed.

Woke up at 2 AM the last couple of nights. Still enjoying job/classmates. I am dropping my H off at work in the morning then he takes the bus home because my back is still out. On the way home, bought my son some groceries. Had to drug myself to sleep last night because my son lost his job recently and has been homeless for a while. His dad doesn't want him at home and if I forced him to let our son come home there is so much drama that it harms my son's mental health (which is not good). Trying to save earnings to help my son but also always buying him things because it is more expensive to eat, etc. when you are homeless. No one in our family supports our son but me so I have to increase my earnings in order to help him. In addition to my Monday - Friday job, I work at events on the weekend.....

(((((( nowinners and son ))))))

Of course you want to help your son.
Thank you for caring. I am sure you mean a lot to your son.


WC

Is the switch not biking home helping with falling asleep? (On waking in the middle of the night, yeah that's a drag. Happens to me a lot too.)

I wondered from the initial post if maybe it was the physical wind up of the bike riding home so late (like they say not to exercise before bed because it can keep you up) and not hypomania. So naturally I'm curious. (Also I guess if there have been other signs to indicate hypomania as opposed to insomnia.)

I blew off good sleep hygiene for a long time, but turns out it does help. Who knew?! Lol.

I'm right there with ya on a fairly arduous commute (over an hour,, 3 busses, a train and a 1/2 mile walk)

Hope your back feels better soon.

Not sure if it is helping me fall asleep but being woken up from a painful "charely horse" (a painful muscle cramp) in my right calf muscle has stopped.

I slept to 3:30 AM last night. I think I was excited about my job last week and not used to the new routine. My sleep felt back to normal last night--I have always tended to sleep 6 hours most nights and less than that a few nights a week. The less than 6 hours nights seem to be associated with anxiety and rumination....

Back is still out and I miss walking or bike riding. I am confident that with time, it will heal. Thanks for your encouragement.

Thank you for this message. I received my first check yesterday. Was able to give him some gift cards for food including one his dad wanted me to get for him. He seemed very depressed--of course he is, he is homeless and has been for a while. I told him I would be working on shelter (and I do hope to come up with something soon). I have been wanting him to go to a therapist because I worry he is bipolar and that is one (besides his parents/us) of the reasons he is in his current situation. He responded that he thinks he is a high functioning autistic savant. I just don't know and, of course, can't rule out what he says. I am really enjoying being with people at work and feel good I will be able to handle the job but the situation with my son clouds everything. It is usually the reason I can't sleep at night. It is the main thing that effects my relationship. I enjoy my husband so much but sometimes I think--if H **** then my son would come home (though it is a bit more complicated than that--our son has done some unexceptable things that would cause him to be kicked back out again if they were repeated). I hate having these thoughts but I do.....

New job, look busy.

Woke up at midnight (1:30 AM the previous night) worrying about my son. When I saw him last week, he had admitted that he had lost his wallet (license, social security card). I suggested we get his ID, birth certificate from a recruiter (they had ordered a 2nd copies and still have them) so that I could get him a safe deposit box at the bank to safeguard the documents. He said, "What does it matter." He is depressed. Has given up. He has always misplaced things easily. I bought dozens and dozens of badges for him while he was in school and lots of driver's licenses as well. It is possible that he has high functioning autism traits and I missed it. When I called Monday and Tuesday--the call went straight to voice mail so he may have lost the phone as well. All I can do is ride by some places I know he hangs out on my way home from work today. This isn't the first time I've lost track of him.

Haven't been very good at this. I am still sitting next to the girl I sat with in class and we are talking and laughing way too much rather than concentrating solely on our work. We are not that busy yet because we were hired for open enrollment that starts November 5th. On a couple of occassions, someone has come and given us "busy" work (practice exercises looking up things) because we aren't very good at pretending to be busy.

In the meantime, I have taken some calls and I have noticed that my memory isn't as good as it used to be. I hope I don't mess too much up next week.

Woke up at 3 AM this morning and that was good because during the rest of the week I woke up at 2 AM. Still feel giddy and operating on 5 hours of sleep every night. It beats depression. Maybe I will sleep more next week when I have to start working harder....

I don't think I am hypo this week because I slept 8 hours one night this week and more than 7 the next day. I was feeling a bit sleepy on the job yesterday and very depressed last night. I don't know if it was wise but I took 150 mg Bupropion this morning rather than 100 mg. No sleepiness on that dose...

The job is easy and fun. They tell us we are the best class they have ever had. We get along fabulously and have the past experience necessary to do the job well without much supervison.

However, my job leaves me less time to help my son and he is really struggling. I had given him a card to add a month of minutes to his smart phone and last night he told me he lost it. This is the second time in the past 6 months. His phone went dead at midnight.

When I am not stable, I feel like my mood swings make me unpredictable, inconsistent and triggering for him. Now that my husband and daughter have figured out what is going on with me, they seem to take my mood swings in stride. My husband says that our son's situation bothers him too but I obviously struggle much more.

When I try to help my son and am not stable, I feel like I add to his misery. Many times I am perfectly stable but dealing with his erratic behavior upsets me. I am the only one helping him and it feels like the blind leading the blind. Our emotions are too enmeshed. We easily upset each other sometimes.

Things were so quiet at the job today that those of us who are temporary (I am one) are wondering if it could end early.

Now that I am more medicated, I am kicking myself for writing so much about all my thoughts and letting my T and kids see it. I wonder if it was bad for my son's mental health to do that. I worry he might have an issue such as bipolar and he insists he does not despite so many strange things he has done. He may be comparing himself with the state I was in when I wrote those things (and he reminds me all of the time that I attempted) causing him to think -- "Well compared to mom, I am supersane."

And my husband has actually said, "I am super sane--tell your therapist that."" But sometimes I wonder if everything turned out the way it did because, not only am I not quite right but perhaps I am attracted to the same sorts of people. Do any of you think you have been attracted to or just plain have membership in some sort of odd group of people? Is PC a group like that? I can think of friends who were so unique and many were my absolute favorite people. Being odd is rarely boring...

I think I sound a bit crazy here when I was writing this. Too many overgeneralizations about hunches and feelings....

I will be ringing in the New Year at my part time job. Since it is a holiday, they will be paying time and a half and I expect to be working about ten hours. In February, they are also sending a group of us (including me) to work at the Superbowl and the pay is very good for that event. I don't expect to be put in a position where I see the game but who knows where I will be working while I am there.

My temporary, full time job is over but it didn't have to be. With either my husband or I having to take the bus, he asked me to quit 2 weeks before it was scheduled to end. I agreed. The good thing about it was that I was able to be there in a very stress free way for my family during the holidays. I am still needing to help my son. The bad was I really enjoyed that job and when I was mailing a gift to my dad at the post office, I ran into the coworker that sat next to me in class and in our call center. She said the three of them who were left were extended until the end of January and there is the possibility it could go a bit longer than that. It was so good to see her--as usual, we talked and laughed. She programmed her phone number into my phone but I haven't called her yet. I ate an entire package of Walker's Shortbread the next day because I was so sad not to work there with my three friends until that job ended. Yet, I know it is not all bad. I have more time to take care of myself (I have a lot of doctor appointments scheduled for 2019 including physical therapy) and there is an issue going on with my son that I have to attend to. My husband is making good money right now and my family is more important than socializing at work but I do like having a job, making my own money and being out among other people. Some day?

I don't think you sound "crazy" at all!

I hope you will enjoy NYE.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I hope 2019 will bring an easier year for you.

WC

Thanks--yes, some of it is based on more than a hunch but I vowed not to talk about other people's issues. Plus, I can't figure myself out so my interpretation would not do anyone any kind of justice.

HAPPY NEW YEAR Wild Coyote!! Thanks for being there for so many of us!!

Felt pretty undignified at my New Year's Eve job. I was placed on one side of the moving camera platform. My job was to make sure that no one got ran over. When the platform starting rolling I felt like I was running for my life while screaming, "Watch out; move over; etc." I haven't ran in years but fear made me run ever time it got going. I was surprised by how fast I could still run. Some of my coworkers were laughing that they put me there. (Wouldn't it make more sense to put young people in that position verses a 55 year old woman?) Others said, "you are a good runner." I got a work out at that game.