[Fairy102]

Hi I’m currently on my third time in my life trying new pills to get me stable or somewhat at least. My previous two times I didn’t get relief so I stopped taking them withhtout doctor support. Anybody get stable or somewhat? What did that look like for you? Is there hope to not have ups and downs for the rest of my life? I’m currently on seroquel and have recently had symptoms again so we tried to add antidepressants but I have bad reactions to ssri medication. I’m already so tired of these moods. I’m frustrated. I’m getting close to being done again. I just want to hide. I feel so lonely.

[tecomsin]

It was 9 years before I finally settled on meds that i could tolerate to take everyday and would keep me out of serious problems. It was a long and exhausting ordeal to go through so many hospitalizations and ups and downs and all that trouble.

Antidepressants caused me problems and I don't take them anymore even though i'm chronically low and feeling empty. I don't think they help most people with bipolar but that is just a hunch.

What dose of seroquel are you on?

[Wild Coyote]

Finding the right med (or med cocktail) can be very frustrating and takes a lot of patience.

I am currently still seeking a stabilizing combination of meds. In my case, finding and trying meds is like trying to hit a constantly moving target. Very frustrating! I am very grateful my various pdocs have hung in there with me over the many years.

It's important to work on a good relationship with your pdoc as you two will be working together on finding your stability.

I hope you can find the strength to remain patient enough to feel much better!

Welcome to PC!
I hope you will find the information and the support you may be seeking.
I am glad you have jumped in! Please do make yourself at home.
I hope to see you around the forums!


WC

[USMCBIPOLAR7]

It always got better as they tried new things til after 4 years when they found my best mix. Been on them 30 years now and doing great

[Blueberrybook]

Ten years and still looking...

But I am doing better than I was in the beginning.

[MickeyCheeky]

((((Fairy102)))) I'm sorry you're struggling. Unfortunately finding the right meds combination can take a long time... often several months. Don't give up: I'm sure you'll find one that works eventually, like many other people have. Also please speak with your Pdoc before changing or interrupting meds, otherwise things may get worse.

[Fairy102]

Originally Posted by tecomsin

It was 9 years before I finally settled on meds that i could tolerate to take everyday and would keep me out of serious problems. It was a long and exhausting ordeal to go through so many hospitalizations and ups and downs and all that trouble.

Antidepressants caused me problems and I don't take them anymore even though i'm chronically low and feeling empty. I don't think they help most people with bipolar but that is just a hunch.

What dose of seroquel are you on?

I am on 325mg of seroquel. We’ve played around a bit with 350 but it makes me so tired during the day so I’ve stayed at 325 a night. I was doing well for about six months and then I had irritability hypomania for a week and depression for four weeks.

[LMRcelebrate]

Originally Posted by Fairy102

Hi I’m currently on my third time in my life trying new pills to get me stable or somewhat at least. My previous two times I didn’t get relief so I stopped taking them withhtout doctor support. Anybody get stable or somewhat? What did that look like for you? Is there hope to not have ups and downs for the rest of my life? I’m currently on seroquel and have recently had symptoms again so we tried to add antidepressants but I have bad reactions to ssri medication. I’m already so tired of these moods. I’m frustrated. I’m getting close to being done again. I just want to hide. I feel so lonely.

I was able to address relatively quickly. What seemed to work for me is a broad prescription of a number of things with all the common drugs. Sleeping overnight is the key to my health so I began with Trazodone. Then Seroquel at night combined with Buspar. Buspar and Prozac each morning and an as needed anti anxiety pill which I take 1 or 2 times per week.

I also recently learned through other groups not to worry about the exact time of day AM versus PM. Meaning, my AM is 10 or 11 AM and my PM is 11 PM. Most importantly, I take twice per day. Skipping makes me slip.

It does help to journal or note the time of day of moods because I found that that was my best chance at determining what was impactful from a medication to mood correlation.

[Guiness187055]

over 2 years at it and still not perfect.

[BipolaRNurse]

It took four years to get the combination right, and even now I still have to have the occasional adjustment (always up). But I'm happy with my current "cocktail" as it's keeping me very stable.

[Pookyl]

Originally Posted by Fairy102

Hi I’m currently on my third time in my life trying new pills to get me stable or somewhat at least. My previous two times I didn’t get relief so I stopped taking them withhtout doctor support. Anybody get stable or somewhat? What did that look like for you? Is there hope to not have ups and downs for the rest of my life? I’m currently on seroquel and have recently had symptoms again so we tried to add antidepressants but I have bad reactions to ssri medication. I’m already so tired of these moods. I’m frustrated. I’m getting close to being done again. I just want to hide. I feel so lonely.

It’s taken approx 4 years. What I’ve learnt:
It takes a lot of patience waiting to get the magic levels.
Don’t stop taking your meds ever unless you’ve got an MD after your name at the same time as being episode free
I rapid cycle so I am stable for up to 7wks only between episodes. I feel completely normal for those stable periods.
I have accepted that this is my life.

[TheSeaCat]

It has taken me seven months to find a combo that has made me stable enough to work, I'm pretty sure if I saw a Pdoc they wouldn't agree with my current combo and would want to change it, but my current combo is stabilizing so that is what matters to me. I'm happy with my current cocktail but it works.

[Scooter9]

It has been many years for me.

Be patient with yourself. Advocate for yourself. Don't stop your meds on your own.

I'm working through some CBT on my own and finding it helpful. It's a slow process but it's making a difference while I wait for my current meds to help too.

[BastetsMuse]

Originally Posted by Fairy102

Hi I’m currently on my third time in my life trying new pills to get me stable or somewhat at least. My previous two times I didn’t get relief so I stopped taking them withhtout doctor support. Anybody get stable or somewhat? What did that look like for you? Is there hope to not have ups and downs for the rest of my life? I’m currently on seroquel and have recently had symptoms again so we tried to add antidepressants but I have bad reactions to ssri medication. I’m already so tired of these moods. I’m frustrated. I’m getting close to being done again. I just want to hide. I feel so lonely.

I know how it feels to be lonely. I get you. It was ten years before my pdoc put me on Geodon, which took care of the dysphoria and mania. Now I "just" struggle with depression.

[Gabyunbound]

I'm so sorry you're struggling.

It took me some 7 years to get the right combination.

First, I was put on Lamictal and stayed on that for some 6 years. I was also prescribed klonopin for anxiety. It helped immeasurably with depression, but not with hypomania. Then I had a full-blown manic episode and was put on Seroquel, staying on my previous meds. The Seroquel pulled me out of the manic episode, but then my pdoc wanted me to stay on it as a maintenance medication. That was a disaster as I was falling asleep at work and could barely function.

At about the 7 year mark, the Seroquel was replaced with Abilify and that's been my cocktail ever since: Abilify, Lamictal, Klonopin (and propranolol for the 'shakes' from the abilify) and a couple of pain meds for a chronic pain disorder I have.

Anyway, I have been relatively stable on this combination for some 4 years now. I've inched into manic episodes (seeing things, little sleep), but it's been caught early with increases in Abilify, which has been effective.

So, as you can see from the other posters here as well, it can take a long time to find the right combination. Let's hope you're lucky and find the right cocktail asap. Work closely with your pdoc, share with them your side effects and the effectiveness of the medications (I say that because I wasn't always good about it), be willing to try different meds, and hopefully you'll be well soon. I wish you the best of luck!

[katydid777]

Mine still need work. I hope that it will get better as time goes on.

[annielovesbacon]

I started taking meds three years ago. My doctor just added a fourth medicine to my cocktail last month, and I think it might actually be helping, and maybe I am finally finding what works for me. I see him next week so we'll talk about it then.
Meds can be so frustrating. Stick with it, there's bound to be something that works.

[cashart10]

Many, many years. But, the wait and trial and error did pay off as I have been completely stable for more than a year and a half.

I'm still looking for the right meds.

I like lithium, it really helps- but honestly most other stuff does more damage to me than good

I often wonder if I'll be trying diffrent ones for the rest of my life

bit of a tragic thought- but think I might be

[surfzulu]

I am on my best mix now after 20 years. I have been relatively stable most of the time because my job allows bad attendance from the exhaustion from my depression. Sometimes less is more when it comes to meds. Docs just keep adding on meds without reducing others and in my experience that can cause further complications. These are very strong substances we are taking to try to get our brain chemistry better. Unfortunately for many of us it is a process of elimination to find what works and you sometimes have to go through some of the bad to get to the good.

[tecomsin]

surfzulu, that's inspiring to hear that things can actually get better with this disease and medication after 20 years. I am 10 years into my diagnosis and feel quite exhausted but also have other health issues beyond mental health and the combination is tough to deal with sometimes.

I agree also with what you wrote about people ending up on multiple meds at the same time. These medications are poisons to various degrees and it's important to minimize exposure especially long term.

I haven't found any med that really deals with my depression but I think that is fairly common with bipolar. Also won't take benzos. My father got an addiction to xanax. He's also an alcoholic. I stay away from both. I read that benzos can increase the risk of later dementia too.

We are all guinea pigs in terms of finding out what the side effects of these drugs are after taking them for decades in multiple combinations with other drugs.