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#1
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But first, I'm sorry to keep talking here. I know I'm burdening everyone everywhere.
My t said I appeared mixed because my depression is still very high but my energy levels are crazy high too. My libido is beyond the limits. I'm not sleeping much more than five hours on a long night. I did get rid of the old pills, and don't own guns. That helped him be less concerned but he said to call for help if I need it. I do feel suicidal but not too a point of doing anything about it either way. I'm stuck in the self loathing and uselessness and worthlessness. I don't see the point in trying yet again to die when I've not yet succeeded in all the other attempts. My t did recommend I bring a kitty here. I'm not 100% sure I should be responsible for another life because I'm not responsible with my own. I didn't tell him about the mild hallucinations but he also didn't ask. Why do I feel like everyone will be better off without me, especially me? |
![]() Anonymous41462, Anonymous43918, Anonymous45023, Anonymous46341, gina_re, Jedi67, Wander
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#2
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I'm currently in a mixed state as well. feels awful, but I keep telling myself it will pass if I give it time. it's really hard. being extremely depressed but with such agitation and elevation. I have not slept in 3 nights because I have a decreased need for sleep and my mania hits me more at night. a crisis plan was given to me by my T today and I see my PDoc on monday. hope you start to feel better. please keep coming here to update us. you are not a burden here. we care about you and wish you all the best. this will pass!
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"Do or Do Not. There is No Try" - Yoda, Jedi Master ![]() Diagnosed 2008 Bipolar II with Mixed States, Rapid Cycling with Anxiety / Depression: Meds: Zoloft, Latuda, Gabapentin & Depakote. |
![]() Anonymous41462, Anonymous43918
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#3
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Same here. Must be mixed season. I’m
Hateful And can’t stop myself
__________________
schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety d/o haldol, prazosin, risperdal and prn klonopin and helpful cogentin |
![]() Anonymous43918, Jedi67
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#4
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"mixed season" yep. couldn't have said it better myself.
__________________
"Do or Do Not. There is No Try" - Yoda, Jedi Master ![]() Diagnosed 2008 Bipolar II with Mixed States, Rapid Cycling with Anxiety / Depression: Meds: Zoloft, Latuda, Gabapentin & Depakote. |
#5
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Today, my mood has been very unpredictable. I've been through the range today. Flip the spinner and get another mood, just don't plan on any certain one.
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![]() Anonymous43918, FearLess47, Jedi67
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#6
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I feel you. same here. which version is everyone getting today? I'm coming down from a mixed state. it's like a merry go round...
__________________
"Do or Do Not. There is No Try" - Yoda, Jedi Master ![]() Diagnosed 2008 Bipolar II with Mixed States, Rapid Cycling with Anxiety / Depression: Meds: Zoloft, Latuda, Gabapentin & Depakote. |
#7
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I’m mostly down today and have been drinking at a ky derby party
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schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety d/o haldol, prazosin, risperdal and prn klonopin and helpful cogentin |
#8
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I’ve mostly wanted to be alone today. I’ve left that party a lot and it’s finally over. I’m ready for bed
__________________
schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety d/o haldol, prazosin, risperdal and prn klonopin and helpful cogentin |
![]() Jedi67
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#9
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I thought I was ready for bed but after a minute, I was fully wound up. Gonna have a few whiskeys and see what happens
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![]() Jedi67
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#10
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It's a couple days later. Drinking was a bad idea. It makes me worse, much much worse. I'm not doing it tonight and probably not at all. My mind goes very dark and then I go to sleep after only two drinks. Probably meds related. Possibly dangerous! Eeep.
I've been obsessively thinking about simply wanting to be alone or worse, because when I'm around others, I see how much I don't fit. It's almost like I'm watching myself as I interact and can see, via their body language, how much they don't care. It's obvious. I'm done trying to connect to people in real life. They don't get me nor need me. |
![]() Anonymous43918, Anonymous45023, FearLess47, gina_re, Jedi67
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#11
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It seems like a lot of us are dealing with mixed episodes right now. Lack of sleep makes everything so much harder. I’m sorry that you’re feeling so crappy right now. Please be sure to seek help if you need it. Big hugs.
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![]() BeyondtheRainbow, Jedi67
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![]() BeyondtheRainbow, Jedi67
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