[franz kafka]

I've had a really rough week of depression, suicidal thoughts, and psychosis. I feel like I'm finally coming up for air and now I can't remember anything that happened. I feel like I've totally lost a week of my life.

Anyone else experience memory loss during episodes?

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Yes. My therapist tells me it is often a gift although he usually will give me at least some idea of what I missed (I don't think he tells me every detail when it has been bad). I believe him but I do find it frustrating.

Not to sound like a broken record but the clozapine could contribute; it's so sedating when adjusting to a new dose. The last time I increased my dose it was 4 day pulse and I don't/didn't remember any of those 4 days except that I slept a lot for about a week.

[Jedi67]

During episodes I certainly do lose my memory of things, people and places. It's like a type of "blackout" I hate it. I also forget things I've read or seen on TV as well as peoples's names and such. I do have some lucid days when I get enough rest and feeling more level. Then my memory re-adjusts itself.

[wiretwister]

someone is always telling me things I have no memory or saying or doing , and forgetting things they told me , ... may just be old age though ...

[fern46]

Yes. I remember everything I did while I was manic until the psychosis set in. I blacked out for a lot of that period. My behavior was scary and extreme. I remember bits and pieces of it now. Most of the time something like a dream or a song will trigger a new memory. I am shocked every time something new comes back to me. I still cannot believe half of the stuff I said and did. It was like I was possessed. My poor husband had a front row seat for all of it, but he keeps it to himself. He doesn't like talking about it and he doesn't want to trigger me. He just confirms my memories as they come back to me. I would give anything to rewind time and not put him through what he had to endure while I was sick. The same goes for my children. They only saw some of it, but I traumatized them. They bring up things I said sometimes and I'm horrified each time.

[downandlonely]

I don't really black out, but when I'm depressed, my short-term memory gets really bad and I can't remember what I need to do that day or concentrate. I'll even forget things like how to get home from work.

[HALLIEBETH87]

I forget a LOT about my episodes especially with psychosis

[still_crazy]

i had cognitive problems and memory issues when on neuroleptics..which i need...until i started taking loads of antioxidants and such (Orthomolecular). im still a tad slowed down, but...no tics, stiff gait, dysphoria, major memory problems, concentration issues, etc...and i take a somewhat higher than normal dose of Abilify. true story.

[franz kafka]

My memory actually got a lot better since starting clozapine. It's just this past week that I've had issues.