I'll just try to keep this short and out of the check-in thread...

I'm having a difficult time with work nowadays. The problem is not that work is overly intellectually challenging or taxing; it's that work requires me to have a lot of focus, and well, I have immense difficulties focusing. When you compare my work ethic to the work ethics of my coworkers, you will see that I take twice as long as my coworkers to do similar tasks, and I'm confident that the extra time I take is due to my poor focus and concentration.

Let's just take a basic task like reading a web article. Everyone can relate to that, right? Just a blog article, news article, whatever. Well, I literally have to reread sentences two, three, or even four times before I can comprehend them. Now imagine how much more time I am spending on an article compared to my coworkers.

Normally I wouldn't give a s*** about that, but my boss isn't happy. He cancelled my promotion and gave me stern warnings about how slow I am with getting things done. I can't and won't reveal my diagnosis to him. I think that's just going to set me up for failure in a number of ways.

I will admit to everybody here that I do take frequent breaks -- like 15-30 minutes long every hour or two -- but I have to. I know I won't be effective AT ALL if I don't take breaks. My therapist recommended for me to do this, and it's been helping, but evidently not enough. I already put in extra hours and I'm STILL slow. I don't think I'll lose my job right away, but that possibility makes me nervous. I just want people to focus more on the quality of my work and not on the quantity. I know that quantity makes a difference sometimes, but it feels like no one cares about the quality of my work because I go so slow... So much for slow and steady wins the race...

[Moose72]

This may be a silly question, but do you have distractions at home to a minimum- No music, no tv, etc? I think that would at least help, if it doesn't fix the problem completely. Frequent breaks are a GOOD thing! Experts say its good to get up and stretch and change direction mentally for a couple minutes every so often.

[Wild Coyote]

I think I recall you've been diagnosed with attention deficit? If so, are you adequately treated for this at this time?

Are there too many distractions when you work at home which might put you behind in meeting goals/deadlines with work?

I hope you can get this sorted out. I know you need your job. I also know you want to do well at anything you do, which is a wonderful attitude.

[Fuzzybear]

I think that frequent breaks can be very helpful. I do not remember to do this often enough, it helps me, if I remember to ...

[fern46]

Hey Blue. I'm sorry this concern has been raised by your manager. I imagine it doesn't feel good to hear that feedback.

I think maybe though there are two separate things going on. You've had some issues either up or down one way or the other for quite a while now. Throughout all of those you have reported increased difficulty concentrating. I imagine the culmination of all of those periods resulted in less work production. I know there were times you mentioned your coworkers even noticed something was up. You seemed dialed into all sort of things other than work at the time, so maybe if you get better control through your recent med changes, things will improve? I think you have every reason to be hopeful for that.

I think those issues adding up is probably different from the normal level of distraction you experience due to the attention deficit. Lots of managers work with those with that diagnosis and they are trained to make accommodations in many cases.

At this point it seems likely to me that your coworkers sense something is amiss. Could you tell your manager you have attention deficit and are working to iron out a few issues with it? That way you wouldn't need to expose everything, but maybe he could have greater compassion for your needs. You're incredibly intelligent and I imagine you to be quite an asset to any team. Hang in there!

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

I'll just try to keep this short and out of the check-in thread...

I'm having a difficult time with work nowadays. The problem is not that work is overly intellectually challenging or taxing; it's that work requires me to have a lot of focus, and well, I have immense difficulties focusing. When you compare my work ethic to the work ethics of my coworkers, you will see that I take twice as long as my coworkers to do similar tasks, and I'm confident that the extra time I take is due to my poor focus and concentration.

Let's just take a basic task like reading a web article. Everyone can relate to that, right? Just a blog article, news article, whatever. Well, I literally have to reread sentences two, three, or even four times before I can comprehend them. Now imagine how much more time I am spending on an article compared to my coworkers.

Normally I wouldn't give a s*** about that, but my boss isn't happy. He cancelled my promotion and gave me stern warnings about how slow I am with getting things done. I can't and won't reveal my diagnosis to him. I think that's just going to set me up for failure in a number of ways.

I will admit to everybody here that I do take frequent breaks -- like 15-30 minutes long every hour or two -- but I have to. I know I won't be effective AT ALL if I don't take breaks. My therapist recommended for me to do this, and it's been helping, but evidently not enough. I already put in extra hours and I'm STILL slow. I don't think I'll lose my job right away, but that possibility makes me nervous. I just want people to focus more on the quality of my work and not on the quantity. I know that quantity makes a difference sometimes, but it feels like no one cares about the quality of my work because I go so slow... So much for slow and steady wins the race...

Sorry you are struggling with this, blue. I do believe myself, that some of us with bp do sometimes suffer from focus and attention issues, even though we may not have ADHD, itself. I know I had and still do. Can' recall all your meds off the top of my head, but I will just share that my life really changed in this regard the first time I took Adderall. Total transformation for me. Now, I am on Provigil, which is even more effective, but I may have to stop it due to a weird side effect. In that case, it will be Adderall again, I imagine.

Anyhoo, just a few thoughts for you. Might be worth checking tin to one of these, if you have not done that before. It might help your focus and attention--quite a bit.

Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Daonnachd]

When I was teaching and had students with similar struggles we often found that music without words helped focus and comprehension. Perhaps you could try something along those lines if you haven't already.

[*Beth*]

I'm so sorry, blue, that your promotion was cancelled.

My husband, who has ADHD (that he refuses to take meds for) used to have the same problems you've described, back when he was working (before retirement). I can understand how difficult and draining that kind of struggle is.

I also believe that the breaks are smart.

I can understand why you are reluctant to tell your supervisor about having BP. That can get tricky. How are your meds doing?

[~Christina]

Maybe use the timer concept like many use to cleaning .. For work set the alarm for like 1 hour, set alarm for 20 mins to take a break. then back to work for an hour, then 20 min break.. As for your breaks I dont think getting on the internet is wise, I think we can get sucked into it and lose track of time.. maybe better idea would be take a walk around your apartment complex, or use your exercise equipment, or take that 20 mins to clean your kitchen or bathroom.. So your taking care of work and things around the house, then when done for the day you can wander the internet, come here, Watch TV Play your Guitar etc

I think you need to force structure into your day.

[Wild Coyote]

(((((( Bluebicycle ))))))

Thinking of you!

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((( blue )))))))))

[*Beth*]

Hi blue, How are you doing?

Thanks everyone. I totally forgot about this thread. lol.

I'm doing okay. I'm trying to redeem myself at work by working extra hard, but I'm afraid I'm going to burn myself out.

I'll try some of your suggestions to see if they work. They can't hurt to try, anyhow.

I wish I could tell my boss about my struggles, but he's from India and there are large cultural differences when it comes to mental health, so telling him is not worth the risk IMO. I wish I could without consequences, though...

[Zeroid]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Maybe use the timer concept like many use to cleaning .. For work set the alarm for like 1 hour, set alarm for 20 mins to take a break. then back to work for an hour, then 20 min break.. As for your breaks I dont think getting on the internet is wise, I think we can get sucked into it and lose track of time.. maybe better idea would be take a walk around your apartment complex, or use your exercise equipment, or take that 20 mins to clean your kitchen or bathroom.. So your taking care of work and things around the house, then when done for the day you can wander the internet, come here, Watch TV Play your Guitar etc

I think you need to force structure into your day.

Christina, that sounds similar to the Pomodoro Technique, but with longer increments. I'm going to try this out as soon as the guy with the leaf blower outside the window shouts the hell up.

[~Christina]

I have land , Live in a small mostly farm land. I only hear cows and coyotes LOL

I use to live in the land of subdivisions, mowing at 6am , leaf blowers , traffic, sirens etc... If I heard it here I'd have a heart attack haha