waste of...

I have the feeling of being ''a waste of space''... which someone else mentioned in a post. I feel as if I do ''not have much to add'' sometimes, which in some family units had equated to being ''a waste of space'',

This is part of my internal ''voices'' (?) which tell me there is ''no way out except for''..... something we are not supposed to discuss here.

Also my allergies to what seems like everything... including multiple meds and cats and dogs and MANY other things

I cannot ''closely'' relate to those who have a pet. I have tried before. For one thing I have to stay away from their pet.

Sometimes... I don't feel this way. Sometimes, I can be happy, I have the ''ability'' to ''enjoy life'' and to feel good.

I have had ... several.... very bad experiences in

trigger

hospital

These were a long time ago..., mostly when I was a child. The last one was when I was 19.

I was also retraumatized in long term therapy.

I had thought I had ''got over'' that....

But recently I realised I probably had not ''got over'' that when I tried to contact a therapist ....

My anxiety sky rocketed. I can feel it right now even posting this (but nowhere near as bad when I was researching the therapist recently...

I realise I am fortunate to even have any ''choice'' in who I might (theoretically) consult., and that reminded me of yet another insult the long term therapist gave me.... how I, apparently, was ''unfortunate''.... yeah ok, so if so, would not a human being deserve compassion and respect? As I personally believe all human beings deserve...

Sorry about the rant.. again, I guess this rant makes me a ''waste of space''... at least that's what my mind is telling me.

these things... contribute to my being a waste of space.

You are not a waste of space. You help me and many others here with your posts. I think you are a very noble and heroic person. The world is lucky to have you in it.

Though I sometimes feel I have outlived my usefulness, or exceeded my "use by" date, I do not believe I experience anywhere near the depth of distress/upset/agony you feel hearing those "waste of space" echoes. Those voices echo from your earliest years.

Im so sorry youre feeling like this @Fuzzybear

Youre certainly not a waste of space. Youre so lovely and so helpful on these forums, the world is lucky to have someone like you!

And you never have to apologise for posting. Im just so sorry youre feeling this way.

I think just looking for a therapist is a huge step based on what youve been through, so well done. Make sure you show yourself some compassion and kindness, because you certainly show other people that on these forums and I personally am so grateful for you!

You mean a lot to all of us on the forums

You are very important, Fuzzybear! You're a vital part of our community. When you weren't here for a while, it felt like something that we're supposed to have was missing. I hope you can find a wonderful T who will know ways that really help, & also the best doctor to help you with your allergies. Thank you for being & staying with us, dear Fuzzybear!

I am sorry that you are allergic to pets....if I am reading this correctly.
Of course you are not a waste of space.
As you can see the out pour of responses.
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

I understand that feeling but you're a big part of this community.