The pendulem has swung...rant

Too bad for me it has swung to the depression side for me. I struggle to stay awake and if I am awake I struggle with all my trigger points. So I just make myself go back to sleep. I'm not eating, I'm not cleaning house. I just get up shower and crawl up on the couch and turn on the T.V. and stare aimlessly at the screen and just veg. I don't venture out of the house unless it's to go to the mailbox and then I crawl back into my hole. I only go out of the house to go to my mom and dad's to get my weekly money and to go to therapy. Oh I go out to lunch once a week on Sunday's with my parents and Grandma. That is torture.

I want this to end. I want to swing back into the other direction. I have mentioned this to my doctor and he says just to hang in there that it is probably just the holidays that have me like this. That it will end that it always does. He won't do anything with my meds until he sees me face to face and I can't get an appointment with him until my scheduled appointment which is in the end of January. That's what I get for having a good pdoc that has his own practice where he is the only pdoc there.

Thank you for reading my rant.

Jan

hi jbug, i was a little shocked at your pdoc's response to how you are doing and the delayed time to see him. if you continue to feel the way you do, i'd call him again and insist he see you, INHO. yes it may be the season, etc but it may not too. sometimes for me a minor adjust in my meds for a short while would keep me from going down as far as i can go cause we put the skids to it.
..and rant all it takes to get it out, k?
i'm a jan, too.

Hang in there!!!! I know it feels like this will never end. But it will. That's the one good thing about Bipolar. Every episode ends. Just try to remember that.
And YES! Call your pdoc back! I don't know if this is an issue or not, but maybe tell him you need to be safe? Whether you are or you aren't. Saying you need to be safe isn't making up a suicide intent, if you wwere worrying about lying.
But, maybe if you say that, he'll take you more seriously.
I hope you are safe and that's not what is going on. And I don't think that is why he should help you. You deserve his help no matter what.
It's just an idea I had that might expidite things.

PS I second Madisgram--rant all you want!