It's true...

I'm going to be alone forever.
I'm unloveable, and the people who have the guts to try to love me, I push them away, and they don't come back...

...I know the feeling. I feel that just by existing and being the way I am, I mess everything up. Even the people who really love me - I can't even make them happy. It's awful. Being rejected after you've honestly done your best - that's a huge hit.

I don't think you're unlovable. But there aren't very many people who have what it takes to stay with us. The intensity, the accusations and cognitive distortions, the seeming loss of all reason (to them, anyway), the inconsistencies and fluctuations in us - all these things batter them and make the relationship seem untenable. Me, and maybe a lot of people here, are more like, "So it's stormy. And?" We definitely don't feel the same way about it. I can take A LOT in any relationship I have before I throw in the towel. But I've found that "normal" people don't have that kind of endurance and tenacity, and in fact, it seems completely alien to them. You know, the idea of sticking around when there's an uproar.

I've been losing people like crazy the last two years. I can't hold onto them for anything.

Ya...'the normies", and "the perfects' have a hard time holding on. But, trippin you've been with that guy for 15years....it just may be in one of those dips for now. It may take a year, month, six months...or whatever...but I doubt he'll block you out of his life forever. That would be something we would do. LOL

Lmao! I really hope you're right... Thanks

Heya, I am new here and just getting use to everything and I just wanted to pop by and say I am sorry you feel this way and I can relate to this so much. Take care Lbb x

Hi, so sorry that you can relate, but glad you responded. Look forward to seeing you around. XOXO