[BaksAspen]

Hi everyone,

First, I want to thank every brave person on here for letting me and everyone needing help, feel like we're not alone. I've been diagnosed with BPD since 2001 and I haven't taken any counseling or therapy because I have no insurance. So I try to read as much as possible and try to work things out and it has been an uphill battle.

But here is my concern now, the last year or so I have been daydreaming a lot, daydreaming that I am someone else with a totally different personality and I'm starting to feel emotions from this. Let me give some details.

I am very metro-sexual, I'm 35 but look like I'm in my early 20's. I'm very feminine and very emotional and people say I am the kindest, sweetest man they have ever met. I'm very childish and watch more cartoons than adult shows and my two kids love it because they have a grown up kid to play with. But when I have an emotional episode where I "think or feel" that someone has done me wrong, I start to think like that wrestler Stone Cold Steve Austin, lol. I literally feel like a red neck (absolutely no offense) and get very, very aggressive. I talk differently, start using language that I don't normally use, I get very, very confident and that train of thought makes me feel good after it. I like it because I feel like I have a big brother step in and help me.

It's scary because it's not me, but it feels good because I feel protected by this other "personality" that will not let anyone take advantage of me. Has it gotten to the point that I go into therapy, or is it a defense mechanism to help me cope? Anyone with similar experiences? Any thoughts? Thanks!

[TheWell]

I usually think of it this way; if you are asking if you should go to therapy you probably need to go to therapy.

It sounds like you do need to work this out with a professional. I hope it works out for you.

[Pink River]

It's clear that there are some new things going on in your personality so I think yes you need to go into counseling. Only a professional can really tell you. Please seek out some help other than here on the boards. We can be here to support you but a trained professional will be able to help sort all this out.

[acrosstheborderline]

Originally Posted by BaksAspen

Hi everyone,

First, I want to thank every brave person on here for letting me and everyone needing help, feel like we're not alone. I've been diagnosed with BPD since 2001 and I haven't taken any counseling or therapy because I have no insurance. So I try to read as much as possible and try to work things out and it has been an uphill battle.

But here is my concern now, the last year or so I have been daydreaming a lot, daydreaming that I am someone else with a totally different personality and I'm starting to feel emotions from this. Let me give some details.

I am very metro-sexual, I'm 35 but look like I'm in my early 20's. I'm very feminine and very emotional and people say I am the kindest, sweetest man they have ever met. I'm very childish and watch more cartoons than adult shows and my two kids love it because they have a grown up kid to play with. But when I have an emotional episode where I "think or feel" that someone has done me wrong, I start to think like that wrestler Stone Cold Steve Austin, lol. I literally feel like a red neck (absolutely no offense) and get very, very aggressive. I talk differently, start using language that I don't normally use, I get very, very confident and that train of thought makes me feel good after it. I like it because I feel like I have a big brother step in and help me.

It's scary because it's not me, but it feels good because I feel protected by this other "personality" that will not let anyone take advantage of me. Has it gotten to the point that I go into therapy, or is it a defense mechanism to help me cope? Anyone with similar experiences? Any thoughts? Thanks!

I agree with everyone else here you need to see a counsellor to help you sort this experince your going through .. I have always had trouble daydreaming , forgeting where I am or what time it is extra ... There s nothing wrong with day dreaming but if its a constant and affecting your everyday liveing you definately need to see a professional ... I hope this site helps you ... for support and understanding of your condition ..

This isn't meant to sound disparaging or make light of your situation so please don't take it that way. I'm sure it's quite scary. Regardless i'd love to enter another, more domineering personality for just a few minutes when I'm down, scared, or feeling that people are taking advantage of me. Lynda Carter's 1970's version of Wonder Woman comes to mind. Seriously...good luck in getting assistance and I'll be thinking of you.

[miss_rainy]

BaksAspen, I just wanted to say I had a similar experience like that, maybe not just like yours but something similar.
Sometimes, like after watching a character on t.v. or being around somebody who's personality that I start to adore, I will start to pick some traits from them.
When daydreaming, I'll imagine some scenario either relating to real life or totally imagined and my mind set and self image becomes exactly like them and it will go on to an elaborate scene.
Sometimes in real life, I'll take on that persona and become it and change my whole self and talk like they do or mimic their habits whether either good or bad. Like if the person is really confident and open, I will be like that for that moment or day or if they're really quiet and awkward so will I'll be...
Personally, I think I'll agree it's way of coping with things. Like for instance when imagined I was someone else who was much thick skinned, colder and malevolent... during a bad break up.
Im my view, it's not that bad only if it's starting to affect your life in a negative way significantly or at least that's my opinion.
Thanks for sharing btw, sorry for the typos.