[anxiety247]

A few weeks ago I was enraged. Started a fight with a neighbor. He knows about my bpd and that day he was walking away from me and not engaging the fight. After that I didn't talk to him for over a month and he just told me that the day he was trying to get away from me he lost his tooth (bridge) so the poor guy has been walking around without his tooth in and then has to shell out money to get it replaced. Because I decide I want to blow up on him I feel like complete ****!!!!!

You didn't know. That doesn't make the blowing up inexcusable but you didn't intentionally make it worse for him. Apologize...buy or get him a small token of peace and friendship, and let it go. Don't beat yourself up over it.

[anxiety247]

No i didn't know and I didn't intentionally meant for any of this to happen. However there has to be some accountability on my part I can't shrug it off like whatever. I mean I was a raging lunatic screaming at this guy and now he has to go around without a tooth because of me. Take him to lunch or a card doesn't seem right at this point.

I guess I'm just not getting the connection. I understand he was talking away from you due to his tooth being out, but how is it your fault that his tooth came out in the first place? Sorry. Just trying to understand.

[BrokenNBeautiful]

The sequence of events sounds disturbing; I can understand how you would feel like it was your fault. You, know the old thing: "I yelled at my mother and she died the next day..."

But maybe he was having a problem with his bridge anyway. Maybe it was his dentist's fault for placing it incorrectly. Or even if he was gnashing his teeth, that was something he did. You did not "make him do it".

I know it doesn't feel so good though.

I blame myself a lot for t hings.

Carol