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#1
Dec 05, 2012, 04:43 PM
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This is me. I look happy here. I was intoxicated and did stuff regretted that night.
But it time to face who I am. This fun mask is what every one sees. I wish I could be her every day ImageUploadedByTapatalk1354743804.972619.jpg |
 Anonymous32912, radioactivegirl
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#2
Dec 05, 2012, 04:45 PM
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Meaning the happy girl, not the intoxicated and doing stuff I regret girl
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#3
Dec 05, 2012, 07:09 PM
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In reality, you can't be that girl every day of your life. But that's what makes you beautiful. You have dimension, you are a multi-faceted human being who has much to offer the world. Be proud of every shade of emotion you have. But don't get stuck in the past missing this girl.
__________________
Dx: Borderline Personality Disorder, Depression, Chemical Dependency, Generalized Anxiety Disorder Rx: Effexor XR 300 mg, Risperdal .5 mg, Cogentin (as needed for tremors due to Risperdal), Depakote 1000 mg "Immerse your soul in love."
-- Radiohead. |
 greyclouds
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#4
Dec 05, 2012, 07:22 PM
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I understand. I too have had a mask my whole life. I have always been the strong, energetic, good, enthusiastic person. Always doing okay. A couple of years ago I couldn't do it anymore and kind of collapsed. I'm kinda old and wish it didn't take me so long to allow myself to be human. Most people have emotions that go up and down and that is healthy and human. I realized I needed to start showing some of the less fun emotions to my children to be a positive role model about not having always to be so "perfect" or always be in a good mood. It has not been easy in fact it is painful to tug at that mask but I am beginning just now to see it is worthwhile and healthy.
Believe in who you are and allow others to know you, not just the happy you. |
| greyclouds
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#5
Dec 06, 2012, 02:37 PM
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Quote:
But I agree; I want to stop pretending. I am not just funny but I am not just screwed up either. I am a human being. I guess I just wasn't allowed to be one growing up and that's how I learned to just appear happy. "Nobody likes a sad person." or "Are you trying to get attention again, you pathetic ****?!" Ugh. thanks, Carol
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The idea of a soul mate is an ILLUSION. In reality, we must learn to be our own best friend/partner. Then if love comes to us, we will already be whole. All that love can do, at that point, is enhance our wholeness!  |
| greyclouds
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#6
Dec 06, 2012, 05:12 PM
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I think it's even worse for you women, but even as a guy I've been able to put on a "face" no matter how torn up I was inside. Thing is I think there is good about it, it's just that many people like me, forget how to be real cus we where the mask so much of the time. Shoot I have to stop and thik about how I really feel half the time.
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| BrokenNBeautiful, greyclouds
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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