Finally an answer...

I recently discovered why my life has been so chaotic for so many years....I am 33 years old and was just diagnosed with BPD a few months ago. I have 4 children by three different men. I have never been able to sustain a long term relationship or friendship....that is until I met my angel. My fiance stuck by me for two years of hell before I finally had my light bulb moment. For the first time in my life I had someone who set boundaries for me instead of letting me push or pull away. I left him about 4 months ago which was an event that lead towards me getting help. I packed up all the kids while he was at work one night and disappeared for 3 days. I changed my number and did anything else I could to run away from him. This man refused to let me leave this way....he made me be accountable for my reckless and selfish decision. He refused to give up on me....long story short, I came home and had a few more irrational outbursts before I was confronted with behavior that I could not ignore. I was tracking mileage on the car and spending hours trying to find something...anything that would prove that he was cheating on me. I put him thru HELL!! I am happy to say that I am in therapy twice a week and my fiance and I do couples therapy once a week. It is scary to confront all these issues and I fall often, but I am determined to become a healthier person and to stop allowing this disorder to control me!!

That must be a big relief for you--to finally get the help you need! I was just officially dx'ed with BPD, even tho I kinda knew I had it for a long time, and started DBT group. I've only been thru one group session so far, but I already feel like a weight's been lifted off my shoulders.

(((brokenwings79)))

Kudos to you for not letting yourself close up with your fiance'! I have a heck of a time with that aspect of BPD. I try very hard to be 100% open and honest with my bf, but that's a really difficult thing for me to do. I hope that things continue to go better for you and your family.

I think your SO deserves a big party in celebration for being the type of partner everyone should try to be with theirs. Whether the other person is bpd or otherwise, that level of commitment and devotion is a rare find in today's day and age of fast food and quick fixes in every way. People don't stick with their partners anymore and that's even with people without PDs!

I'm happy for you and glad you found a good one to be with

You better keep this one. They don't come around everyday. Trust me, I'm still looking

*hugs*

Congrats for coming to terms with your disorder and getting help...