[allme]

Hi all...long time no speak!

Today has been a bad day and I haven't had one for a while but am withdrawing from drugs, food and cigarettes. Anyway, I work from home and have worked for my boss for nearly 4 years. In that time I have slept in once and then for a second time Monday just gone. She didn't give me a warning but FINED me £150. It was a bad day that day at work (I work on commission) and didn't even earn that that day. SO I WENT MAD> I lost it and flooded her with txts about how unfair it was and in a normal job I may have a warning but no way would they take money off me. So now she wont answer my last message. I am convinced, from what she said, that I have lost my job. I can't stop crying and full of anxiety. I feel like taking a load of tablets and partly, for some sick reason, to teach her a lesson :

I don't know what I would do without my job. It is everything to me.

Big hugs to you

Try not to act on those impulses, it really isn't worth it. It won't do anything to teach her a lesson and will just hurt you. It really isn't worth that can you send her a message apologising for losing it and just explain you're having a bad week atm without going into detail? Let her know how much the job means to you

[allme]

Originally Posted by secretwhisper

Big hugs to you

Try not to act on those impulses, it really isn't worth it. It won't do anything to teach her a lesson and will just hurt you. It really isn't worth that can you send her a message apologising for losing it and just explain you're having a bad week atm without going into detail? Let her know how much the job means to you

Thanks

I can't stop myself from messaging her. I don't want to say sorry right now as I feel I have done nothing wrong. But things keep coming into my head and I keep sending them to her. Her last message wouldn't tell me if she's sacked me she just said she is fed up and doesn't want one more message from me tonight. I don't know if I can help myself I am in such a mess with worry and anger. I feel like I want to do something drastic if that makes sense. I just can't calm down

I understand can you talk to your husband at all? Is he home to offer support? Can you play with your dogs and let them calm you down a bit? I know cuddling mine helps when I'm getting overwhelmed.

[allme]

Originally Posted by secretwhisper

I understand can you talk to your husband at all? Is he home to offer support? Can you play with your dogs and let them calm you down a bit? I know cuddling mine helps when I'm getting overwhelmed.

Yes thanks he has tried....but to be honest being here right now has helped calm me down a bit. Just writing it helps. I know nothing has actually happened but when I lose it, I really do lose it. I really am all or nothing. If I am not careful I will be up all night. Though saying that, I feel drained from all the emotion and anger. I hate losing it. But I really think I had a right to lose it over her sending me a 'fine' for sleeping in. It's just unheard of. I just wish in these situations I could keep my cool and deal with it appropriately. But it seems there is nothing appropriate about me.

I'm glad this helped to calm you at least I think I would have lost it too being fined for sleeping in...I'd also be broke because I sleep in all the time! Maybe being drained is a good thing and you will get some sleep tonight and feel a bit better

[Fuzzybear]