Complete bordem

So bored. So empty. So lonely. I am married and have beautiful children. I am overwhelmed with everything I have to do every day. It still isn't enough to make the bordem go away. Nothing ever is. I keep doing things in hopes to fill the massive void but it only makes things worse and more stressful. What can I do to fill the hole? If only there was a medication for that.

Hello cmc3663: Well... I'm certainly no expert with regard to BPD. But I as I recall, that empty feeling inside is pretty-much a classic symptom. I've never been diagnosed with BPD & presumably couldn't be now. But I have thought that, when I was younger, it might have been a possibility. I certainly have struggled with that same bored, empty feeling you describe. In my case, I damaged many relationships, & spent thousands of dollars, trying to fill that void. It never worked.

From my perspective, there are two ways to approach this. One is to find a therapist with whom you can explore all that is going on with you, why you feel the way you do, & what you can do about it. The other is to take a more "eastern" approach & work on simply accepting the feeling's presence in your life... perhaps establish a meditation practice... that sort of thing... learn to accept what you are feeling... with lovingkindness & compassion.

Given that you're already overwhelmed with everything you have to do every day, the prospect of even taking time to see a therapist, let alone start a meditation practice, along with other related practices, probably seems little short of impossible. And perhaps it is. The thing is, though, it may be unlikely that empty feeling will go away by itself. So unless you can talk it away with the help of a therapist, or learn to simply accept it's presence in your life, it may simply continue to eat at you over the years. That has been the case with me.

I can't say that that feeling hasn't been foreign in my life. It's been there like an imp hidden in the corner of my mind. I've learned to turn that void into something constructive. I pray...for someone else. As someone who has dealt with BPD I would get very selfish in seeking my own desires; it's like getting "Meitious," after realizing this and getting so un happy I had to change...I've tried to put myself aside and do for others. This can be a challenge for people like me, but it does improve with time. The key is "distraction" and not allowing one to dwell on the void or emptiness.
BPD people thinks the world should revolve around them, however I've learned from experience it doesn't "life is meaningless alone." Seek others and their needs and life gets better.

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I really like your comment. I have never even thought of this. So much of my time is wasted worrying about myself. It's so hard to get out of my own head and think about other people. If I can't feel good maybe I can help someone else instead.

Thanks!! I could use that kindness today. I was just at Psych Centrals main site; I got completely overwhelmed. I peeked in the chats too but it was all so foreign to me. I haven't connected in a long time. So I wasn't feeling validated. I guess I've made so much progress I no longer need "chat rooms" to help me. LOL
Once again thank you for your kind words and thoughts.

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So glad I could help 😊