Sorry i not sure if this is fine as a thread, i still worried over it, after messaging a admin who i guessing was busy and didnt get time to look at messages (i understand that he was probably busy doing other stuff)

I got a un somethinged visitor message and for some reason its not letting me make it appear, i tried on laptop and phone and it wont let it come up and get rid of the unread notification thing

Un allowed or un approved or something, weirdly it let me post to that members page, it just wont let me make the message appear on my page

Sorry im getting myself into a worry state over it cause i dont understand why its not letting me make the message appear, when last time i did make it appear

[DocJohn]

When a new member or a member who is in moderation leaves a visitor message on someone's page, that message needs to be approved by the moderation team in order for it to become public and available for all to see. You're able to review the message on your own page while it's awaiting moderation action. But nobody else can see it.

If the message is then removed, it is likely because it violated our community guidelines, or the new member account that left the message was deemed a spam account only here to advertise on the forums. We don't provide individual notice about these administrative actions because they're just a part of our daily activities in keeping the forums spam-free (which is, frankly, a lot of work by our wonderful community support team!).

Hope this answers your question.

[lizardlady]

We don't provide individual notice about these administrative actions because they're just a part of our daily activities in keeping the forums spam-free (which is, frankly, a lot of work by our wonderful community support team!).

I agree completely Doc John. The team does a fantastic job making this is a safe place. Thank you!

I could see the message docjohn and the notice above it, first time i got one with the notice at the top i was able to use the dropdown box thing to allow it up, for some reason this time the dropdown box thing didnt want to let me make it appear myself, tried on laptop and phone couldnt do it on either, i assumed i was doing something wrong

Originally Posted by lizardlady

I agree completely Doc John. The team does a fantastic job making this is a safe place. Thank you!

Liz is fantastic

That's my biggest forum fear to be honest, getting thrown in moderation cause i know from experience i dont get let out until i got a massive amount of mental damage from the message that comes up cause if im left in it too long that message says nasty things that i cant bring myself to repeat, and i have known it on one forum where those in charge edit posts to add violations (spelling) then punish for what they added in then change the post back to what it was

Yes i have actually seen that one happen before .....

Ugh crap starting to stress over it now

It happening to me again i mean cause i know from experience the intention behind it is "lets damage willowtigger even more" instead of using it like "this members going wrong, do it to them until they have shown a few days of right behaviour then we think about letting them out" which is the least damaging (to me) way of getting wanted behaviour out of me

Shh willowtigger theyll do it to you out of anger soon so shh theyll make the message say awful things about how poor Ebony died like the last time the message came up they made it say that i had put cancers into her brain and caused the fits and wobbliness on her last night so shh

[DocJohn]

You must be referring to your experiences on other forums, because you have never been threatened with being thrown in moderation here. Ever.

You've been here for 9 months now. I hope that you're learning we are our own unique online community here and we do things the way we say we do them according to the community guidelines.

Yeah it was other places, after 2012, there was only ever the one place i was on for years where i was safe

I remember a few times there i went into nuclear meltdown mode and a moderator there would take me into pm to calm me down, rather than handing out punishments cause he knew how suicidial i was that year

I think that must of been 2013 cause i dont remember 2012

Idk trying to remember exact is messing with my head

The places that made their message say that about Ebony must of been 2019 cause she died in my arms on the vet table on the 2nd march 2018 and she took my soul and heart as well that day

Idk if i making sense

Willowtigger shhhhhh

[DocJohn]

It all makes sense to me. But what I would strongly encourage you to do is to remind yourself that you're in THIS community now, with us and other members who appear to care about you, and we -- HERE -- don't place members into moderation out of the blue or without talking to them first. You have never been PMed with any behavior that would lead to moderation here.

So when the fear rears its head in the future, maybe tell yourself, kindly, "Willow, you've been here 9 months now, and this has never been an issue. This place isn't like those other places we visited a decade ago. Let's try and stay positive and focused on the present, not the past." IDK if that would help, but I think it's something to perhaps try... take care.

Ok i will try, thanks docjohn, i try to not have nuclear meltdown mode, they make the nuclear reactor at Chernobyl look tame tbh .....

i just wish the past would stay in the past ......

trying to keep the past and the present apart is like dropping a plate then expecting it to be just like it was before it got dropped, some things cannot be repaired, sad fact

just felt i maybe needed to say