I am a long-time CPTSD sufferer. I don't smile a lot and that must turn people off. Lately, I don't seem to enjoy anything and have completely lost interest in life. I've gained weight from all the sitting around and doing nothing. I can't bring myself to mix with others and that includes joining a gym. Exercising is supposed to be good for the mind but, with me, I just seem to get uptight when in public and there is no joy and forcing myself to go is misery.

I know that I am a misfit. T's try and try and try to get me to go out and meet new people but, when I do, it never goes well. I've even stopped volunteering - people just don't like me. Even if I try to perk up, it makes no difference. People don't want me around. T's don't even want me as a patient anymore. I make no progress. It's more than my state of mind; I just don't have the interpersonal skills. Never did. People are routinely mean to drive me away. I can't seem to hold a job much less get hired. I work hard but have little personality. I could not even get my parents to like me. My CPTSD is very bad and I am constantly yelling at myself. I hate my life but don't seem to be able to improve it at all. I seem to be cursed because everything just goes wrong. I go to therapy and am told to be positive! That makes no difference. Changing my thoughts does not improve the quality of my life. All Ts do is build me up only to have me fail again and again. Then they say, get up and try again! I do think that I need therapy but I need much more than thinking positively to succeed. I need skills that I don't seem to understand well or to execute. Meantime, all I do is isolate and get more and more depressed.

[CANDC]

Hhi unguy. So sorry you are feeling so unliked. That is part of the challenging disorders we face. They show us the darker sides of ourselves where hope is a stranger.

I understand how hard it is to socialize especially when self esteem is plunging. It is not easy to copy with CPTSD. I found these myths about PTSD and share it here
Myths & Facts about PTSD | Psych Central

It has been a slow process for me over the last year, but I have become more active in the community and it has helped balanced out my isolation on the outside. I have also found it has helped me build self esteem. This article explains that in more detail. psychcentral.com/lib/building-self-esteem/

Isolating, not doing things usually do, not feeling liked are symptoms of depression and may also be signs of CPTSD. I am sorry your therapists do not have hope for your future. Someone who specializes and is accomplished in coping with PTSD might be a better option for you.

Another option to consider is to have a psychiatrist reevaluate your meds because they do not seem to have your depression in check. There are professionals that will help you. See what options you have.

You can be a volunteer here at PC. There are no special qualifications, just a willingness to reach out to others struggling each day with problems that confront them. Answer the unanswered, welcome new members, participate in the forums. Those are all part of making this a healthy and healing community and you can help with this.

Please feel free to private message me or any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.

I do know people here at PC that like you and who you are a positive influence on. You are making a difference.

Thanks, CANDC. Yesterday, I followed up with the mental health clinic. Due to abuse issues, I am not comfortable with female therapists when dealing with some issues. (All of my abusers have been women.) Shockingly, the clinic did not have a male therapist to assign me but was in the process of interviewing one. After following up, I received a call to make an appointment. My bad luck continued in that he's only available on the two days that I'm currently working. I made an appointment for next Tuesday - a week from today - and will have to alter my work schedule (again) to accommodate therapy. I hope the office understands.

Tomorrow, I go in for dental surgery to have the root of a tooth removed. The first extraction attempt failed because the tooth kept cracking under the gum line. I've been in pain - sometimes severe - for over a week because of it. I would feel a lot better if my luck was good but, for some odd reason, things just constantly go wrong for me. I feel cursed.

During all of this, I have been trying to switch to a diabetic diet. My digestive system is not cooperating - I cannot tolerate a lot of foods on this diet. And, the side-effects of my new heart medication may be making things difficult too as it affects digestion. I have given up all the foods that I enjoyed. The joy of cooking and eating has also decreased significantly.

I'm going through this all on my own. I have no friends. Social skills and acceptance have been a lifelong problem. Thank goodness for PC or I'd have no one to interact with!

You need special people in your life. Unfortunately special people are few and far between.
They do exist though and they usually find you rather than the other way round.

Hey unguy, I'm so sorry you feel like this - I can't improve on the advice already given but just want to say that you are not alone here.

It's hard feeling like you don't fit in, and isolating can feel like the best way to protect but it perpetuates the feeling - I've been there, it's tough.

I'm so glad you have PC, we are here for you - and many of us appreciate what you have to offer.

[alieninshadows]

Hello. Sounds like my life. One thing that helps me is getting rid of the taboo notion that being alone is something bad. pm me

[CANDC]

Originally Posted by unguy

Thanks, CANDC. Yesterday, I followed up with the mental health clinic. Due to abuse issues, I am not comfortable with female therapists when dealing with some issues. (All of my abusers have been women.) Shockingly, the clinic did not have a male therapist to assign me but was in the process of interviewing one. After following up, I received a call to make an appointment. My bad luck continued in that he's only available on the two days that I'm currently working. I made an appointment for next Tuesday - a week from today - and will have to alter my work schedule (again) to accommodate therapy. I hope the office understands.

Tomorrow, I go in for dental surgery to have the root of a tooth removed. The first extraction attempt failed because the tooth kept cracking under the gum line. I've been in pain - sometimes severe - for over a week because of it. I would feel a lot better if my luck was good but, for some odd reason, things just constantly go wrong for me. I feel cursed.

During all of this, I have been trying to switch to a diabetic diet. My digestive system is not cooperating - I cannot tolerate a lot of foods on this diet. And, the side-effects of my new heart medication may be making things difficult too as it affects digestion. I have given up all the foods that I enjoyed. The joy of cooking and eating has also decreased significantly.

I'm going through this all on my own. I have no friends. Social skills and acceptance have been a lifelong problem. Thank goodness for PC or I'd have no one to interact with!

Oh no unguy, when it rains it pours. You have more than your share of troubles right now. I am sorry to hear how many things are paining you, but you are fortunate to get a therapy appointment with a man. Sorry you suffered from abuse.

I am not sure what foods are giving you trouble on the diet. They do have lactose digesting pills, beano and other pills to help. For me yogurt is good for getting my good gut bacteria back on track.

Yoga is helping me get more vitality - if interested start very slow. Can give you links. PM me.

I also find mindfulness has helped me maintain perspective and a healthy sense of humor.

Feel free to PM me for other support anytime.

CANDC

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((( unguy ))))))))))) (if ok)

PM me any time too

This may be a stupid idea but if people are too much for you, would you consider getting a pet? My cat has given me so much love and made a huge difference to how I feel. Especially when things are bad.

Originally Posted by Little Cat

This may be a stupid idea but if people are too much for you, would you consider getting a pet? My cat has given me so much love and made a huge difference to how I feel. Especially when things are bad.

Thanks. Sadly, I am borderline asthmatic and am allergic to dogs and very allergic to cats.

[Fuzzybear]

Grrrrr! I too have severe allergies to dogs and cats. It completely sucks

Originally Posted by unguy

Thanks. Sadly, I am borderline asthmatic and am allergic to dogs and very allergic to cats.

Originally Posted by unguy

Thanks. Sadly, I am borderline asthmatic and am allergic to dogs and very allergic to cats.

Oh unguy I feel that for you, my husband is allergic too and we can't have pets either although we would love too.

[unaluna]

Thinking of you. Have you had the new t appt yet? Also the other day i had salad veg in progresso lite beef soup for dinner and thought of you. The salad veg were kale and cabbage and who knows what - it smelled like chinese hot and sour soup.

[marct]

I am also very alone and not able to socialize at all. It feel like I am on a stage and very body is watching me and picking out my flaws. I am isolated except for my kids visiting at times and hate it. I tried to change my cituation time and time again with no results. I am at a loss.

[Mookster]

Unguy if you want to talk about diabetes and things you can do let me know, I've been type II for the last ten years and I'm controlled by diet and exercise. Because taking new meds causes me to much anxiety, so I won't take anything or use insulin ever... My A1c's for the last 4 years have been 5.1 to 5.6 down from 7.9... Maybe some of the things I've done can help you too.