how can you be yourslef when your not even 100% sure who you are

you can ask anyone who knows me personaly and they,ll tell you that im one of the last people to give in to conformity. but sometime i feel like im trying hard 2be diffrant, does anyone ever feel that way. sometimes im not sure which parts of me are me and which parts are from the things that have infulnced me throuh out my life such as music,anime,, cartoons, and movies. one moment i can be shy person and then the next moment i can be a tough *****. one moment i can be bubbley then another moment i can can be all ''**** the world and everyone in it''. one moment i can me very conifdent and the next i can be the most inscure person you know. im confident and inscure, im diffriant and confromed, im shy and out spoken. which is which.
note: i messed up on the too be part but the ****** edit thing whould not let me correct it without messing up the entire post.

For me, I have found it works the other way around. I go looking for myself and as I find who I am I'm better able to manifest that in my outward life. "Being" one's self is how what's inside us shows on the outside so asking people outside us who we are or even looking outside for clues is not too useful as that is mostly outside coming in when what we want is inside expressing out.

i think all of us have many facets in our personality. therapy has helped me identify behaviors/traits i don't want to keep or to modify them and to see what i like about myself and to hold on to it!

i get this totally, you arent alone with this. its really confusing isnt it? i think this may be what they call an identity crisis. are you desperate to fit in and feel comfortable and happy in yourself? cos i feel that way and its so hard to even imagine getting there. i couldnt tell you my personality traits.. they are just extreme one way or another :P people say "just be yourself!" and it really pisses me off, they blatantly dont understand AT ALL. i get accused of being easily influenced all the time. your bound to be if you have no base personality! i have been diagnosed with a personality disorder, but i should feel more secure. i cant offer you any solutions, as i havent come to any myself, the only advice i can give is to believe that you will form a proper person one day. try to love yourself, no matter how you are.

I have the same problem sometimes. I feel like my personality changes with the day, or the hour. I don't know what I truly like and what I like because I "should" like it. I act differently around different people without even realizing it. People have told me it's a teenage thing. I don't know how old you are though.

Yesterday in GT we were presented with information on STYLES of commumication.
It was very interesting for me to learn that much of what I thought of who I was or my peronality is learned style of communication, and is a piece of the picture of how I function rather than who I am.

Some of what you said reminds me of me, and I am now working out what my style is :Assertive;Passive; Agressive; Passive/Agressive; or a combination of Passive and Agressive called Alternator; where you go usually from Passive until you explode. Of course the style that brings many benefits is Assertiveness.

Not sure if I read you post right, but my friends called me consistantly inconsistant. Trying to fit in and trying to be true to myself.
If this interests you look for opportunities for Assertiveness Training.

g1