[eveshifter]

Everyone I've met (in person, and I'm not saying all bipolar people are like this) who's bipolar has annoyed the heck out of me. They are so bossy and ALWAYS want their way. Now I've only met three bipolar people in my life other than myself so obviously this doesn't mean that everyone bipolar is like this, however it scares me. I wonder if I'm like that, I wonder if people want to be around me. Lately I've been really moody and snippy, and every time I get this way my self esteem takes a plunge. I hate who I am sometimes. I hate not being able to control my emotions, even on meds. I sometimes wonder if when I get married if I'll get a divorce because no one will be able to handle living with me, or if when I have kids if they'll think of me as their crazy annoying mom who they try to avoid except once a year. I don't want to be that person. I try very hard to stay calm and apologize for when I don't but sometimes I just can't help it. Is their anyone out their who feels the same way?

[Gilead]

ES,

I'm not bipolar but I know others who are and still others that appear to be although they are undiagnosed. Most I know feel the same as you about not being able to control their emotions. All I can say is the fact that you try hard to "stay calm and apologize" shows you care about the people/person you're dealing with and in any close relationship showing you care kind of overrides a lot of the less than ideal moments.

As far as marriage goes plenty of them fail without either partner being bipolar so don't throw in the towel on it before it happens. On the children side you never know until you have them - they tend to change the way you look at the world - I think for the better.

Sorry for my less than definitive answer.....

[nice girl]

If i knew me, I'd probably punch me in the face: That's exactly how i feel. . . . So i can understand your pain. . . .
I'm so sorry to hear what you are going through. . . . ((((eveshifter))))
I wish i could be there with you and give you a hug. . . .
I know how hard it is to accept the fact that you are who you are. . . .
Wishing we could be like others. . . . but knowing we are not the same. . . .
It's hard but you have to try. . . .
Try to improve on the situation. . . .
And be strong. . . .
Wishing you loads of happiness and a gr8 future ahead. . . .

[madisgram]

the first thought i had was you're projecting your future. imho there's no percentage in that. living in the NOW can help you find the help you may need and create positive change. bipolar can be frustrating at times but mine doesn't define who I AM. using therapy to change old behaviors and replace them with appropriate behaviors has helped me a lot. i used to be mad i was bipolar cause i didn't feel in control of myself. i gained nothing with that thought. it only hindered me.
i don't blab i'm bipolar, except trusted friends/social stigma, and i find no one suspects i'm "different". with appropriate treatment i may be more "normal" than norms.
overgeneralizing about bipolar ppl when you only know 3 is not helpful for you to make a blanket statement, imho.