[michelle Rene]

I constantly feel like I'm screaming inside and reaching out for help, Yet my lips are sealed shut and I don't move a muscle. I'm sorry if I'm not making sense.. I'm just as confused as you. The new medication I am taking to help me with my mood swings aren't helping me very much but the doctor said to give it more time and maybe up the dosage. I feel.. frustrated about that. Depressed.. I know it is stupid, right? Because I don't have a period, monthly cycle, (Haven't had one in over a year now) my hormones are all out of whack and so I need medication to keep me "In line," if you will.

I'm just so.. frustrated and depressed. The emotional pain feels like too much to handle at times. Part of my disorder is when I feel like I've eaten too much I have the habit of drugging myself up, making everything numb. It helps me to.. forget the pain awhile, you know?

[PleaseHelp]

Sorry you are having such a rough time. Can you reach out for help here or with you T/pdoc? Write how you are feeling.

[tmatte13]

I too feel sometimes that I am screaming at the top of my lungs but no one hears me. Keep talking because I can hear you. I am here to listen anytime. I have been dealing with depression for many years, but just started seeking help for the last two. Many meds and many docs and still no relief, but I know it is out there. I just keep trying and I know that sooner or later I will find the right solution. Hang in there.

[Open Eyes]

Hi michelle,
Oh your talking about the change of life so to speak. That does make you feel like you want to scream. Oh no woman likes that part of life at all. The important thing to realize is that you make sure you get stablized hormonally and that you realize that you are going through a process that causes a lot of inbalanced feelings and emotions. Even moments of depression.

Make sure you keep track of your medicationa and have a journal of you feelings.
Make sure you visit your gyno and talk about it with him or her. If your medication is making you feel worse, than by all means talk about it. Hey when I went on Welbutrin wow, it made me feel like a tennis match was going on in my head, very jumpy etc. Some people cannot tolerate certain medications, so make sure you keep in touch with both the pdoc and the gyno.

You will eventually stabilize so try to not think you are going to be like this the rest of your life. I cannot stress enough to keep track of how you feel, and even what you eat can be over stimulating you. Too much coffee? ETC.

Try to take time to read about what you are going through, there are some herbal things you can try to help you get by. Your not going mad, your not alone, all women experience it some worse than others. Make sure you keep tabs on your hormone levels, can cause depression if they drop too much. It isn't you, it is the change of life as they say, it just takes time to adjust.

Open Eyes

[Sillystring1]

Hi Michelle

You're not alone... your words made total sense to me and its how i feel on an almost daily basis... the frustration of feeling unheard because the words just dont come out... wishing people, especially T, could read my mind so i didnt have to struggle with getting words out.
I find writing is my saviour. Sometimes i read it out in T and sometimes its just for me.
I understand your frustration with the meds too. Wishing i could function on a daily basis without chemical help. But i just have to tell myself that the meds get me to some kind of level from which i can explore my issues in T and learn new coping mechanisms. And my aim is that one day i WILL be able to function without the pills.
And this place is great... i dont post much but just reading others posts makes me realise that I'm NOT alone and that helps a lot