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#1
Aug 29, 2011, 02:54 AM
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Well, I am in my early 40s and back in my younger days, I was a very brave and courageous guy. Not that long ago, let's say early/mid 30s.
By that I don't mean I climbed mountains and did dangerous things. I mean more on the inside. I was ready to take that risk, brave enough to take the risk, in my professional and personal life. I think I've been beat down so much in my current job, that' it's taken my braveness and courageousness out of me. I know for some people it's a bad marriage or a bad relationship, but for me, as how much I try to seperate work and non work life, I think it's gotten to me overall. So my question is, how do I get that back? I know as we grow older we change, but more and more I notice in some situations, I just don't have that urge to speak up, or in an argument or heated discussion at work, I almost go into doormat mode. Now if it's something personal, no problem, but if it's professional, I don't have an urge to argue my point. Not all the time, but I sense it more and more. Any ideas how I get these 2 things back in my personality before I lost all 100 percent of it? |
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#2
Aug 29, 2011, 03:26 PM
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Many of us are broken, after a while by failures and by experiences with rejection.
"once bitten, twice shy". for me, validating how I am feeling as well as knowing deep down inside that my experiences do not have to define me helps. Billi
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The idea of a soul mate is an ILLUSION. In reality, we must learn to be our own best friend/partner. Then if love comes to us, we will already be whole. All that love can do, at that point, is enhance our wholeness!  |
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#3
Aug 29, 2011, 04:25 PM
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hi lance and welcome to pc.
 you're brave and courageous to me...you put your thoughts out here at pc. as i have grown older i find i use the wisdom of experience for when i pick my battles. HOWEVER, could you be experiencing job burnout and fatigue? can you identify why you feel your opinion doesn't count or have value anymore? you're still that person that you feel you have lost...identifying the cause of your lack of self-esteem may help. this article may assist you: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/self-esteem/MH00129
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand |
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#4
Sep 02, 2011, 12:49 AM
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You have to first pinpoint the reasons why you do not "speak up," and why you go into "doormat mode" before a solution can be found.
__________________
 Rise up above it, high up above it and see. |
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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