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#1
Apr 22, 2012, 09:00 PM
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As most users that know me on this site are aware of, I am a serious perfectionist, and I have a long history of attempted suicides and extreme self-harming because of it. I've thought of and done some horrible things to myself.
It takes almost nothing for intense suicidal/self-harm feelings to arise in me, almost as if I am permanently angry with myself and all it takes is a hair for that to be activated, whereby I become a fireball of self-hate. How do I cope with this? How can I ever feel good about myself? |
 Puffyprue
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#2
Apr 22, 2012, 11:54 PM
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For one thing you've gotta keep telling yourself that God doesn't make JUNK!
 You are JUST AS GOOD as anyone else!!! You are just as deserving as anyone else, and just as lovable as anyone else too!!! Many many of us had horrible childhoods -- and we had terrible things done to us as kids. Consequently, our minds began telling us lies -- and so did many PEOPLE. People can be very CRUEL -- and some sickos told us some very hurtful things.  We believed them because we were too young to know that they were wrong -- and no one told us differently! So we grew up thinking we were basically trash---unlovable, stupid, unworthy, undeserving, and a multitude of other things. These are ALL LIES!!!The hard part is "vacuuming out" our brain of all these terrible lies. It's hard to get these many-years old lies out of the brain. But we have to work on it and replace it with the truth -- that we are GOOD people and just as deserving & worthy as anyone else on the planet. We have to learn to LOVE ourselves  cause if we don't we won't be able to love anyone else.  Therapy is crucial. Keep going! (((((hugs))))) Lee 
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#3
Apr 23, 2012, 12:02 AM
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I agree with Leed about therapy being critical. I think it just takes a long time. I wish it didn't, but healing is slow (at least it has been for me). I also agree that feeding ourselves these messages that we are worthy and loveable is important! Also surrounding ourselves with people who will reinforce that is great if you can do that. You can certainly do it on here, and hopefully some of that is possible in your real life also!
Hang in there and keep working at it! And thanks for sharing this, I think that is a good step also. peace, dailyhealing
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dailyhealing "Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it." - Helen Keller Strange how people who suffer together have stronger connections than those who are most content. –Bob Dylan “If you can't fly then run, if you can't run then walk, if you can't walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.” Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
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