I hate this feeling.

This feeling like everyone's happy and successful, save for me of course. There are people in my life who are currently having kids, getting engaged, graduating, going out for summer, all these wonderful things.

And then there's me.

I try to make things better, try to go out, try to do well in school. But it all seems to fall flat. And after so many failures, it just comes to a point where I don't even want to try anymore.

I want to be happy for the people in my life. I want to feel happy about my own life as well, not feel frustrated whenever somebody else has something good going on.

Sweetie, it sounds to me like you have a good case of depression going on. Is there any way you can see a therapist? You need to talk to someone about this. Can you talk to the counselor in school? They'd be happy to talk with you, I'm sure. The ideal thing would be to see a psychologist of course. Is that possible?

If you can't see a therapist, at least see your medical doctor. Tell him what's going on. He might be able to help you. But don't just suffer in silence - that would be the worst thing you could do.

I wish you the best my friend -- please let us know what happens, ok? God bless & take care. WE care! Hugs, Lee

Sounds like my life, Ive lost my fiance and my job so far, plus most of my friends, You need to get help. Id hate to sound pesim. but I found out the hard way that the people you love are the ones that turn on you first...seek real help...

I have watched those same types of people who seem so successful in their early 20's get divorced, change career directions, and stumble with family planing issues in there late 20's early 30's. They are now just starting dating, career, and a successful family. So even though I have been having a slow start my friends and I are now on even footing. I know how hard it is feeling everyone is succeeding and you seem to have trouble with basic life but know as you learn about yourself you'll be able to have a more productive life. It amazed me that friends saw me as 'put together' when I felt I was drowning but I only learned this much later. I would agree try to go see a therapist. Schools generally have a list of off campus professionals that have sliding scale fees. I would suggest off campus because it never seems good to combined your school life with your personal life. Best of luck.

I feel the same way. This turning thirty thing really hit me hard. But I'm reaching out to my parents for help. I feel like i'm not who i should be and it is eating away inside of me. Good luck to you. I hope you find the happiness your looking for.

that was a good reply

I think you might be stuck at the Love/Belonging state of the Maslow Pyramid, which is not bad as you're only one step away from the Esteem state.

In my opinion you should try and reinforce the things you already have, like getting more in touch with your friends and family, and if you have a partner work on a better sexual intimacy. If you're lacking one of the things I already mentioned you should try and focus in obtaining those things. In any case what I mentioned would improve your possibilities of obtaining achievements, which will eventually lead you to attain more confidence, thus boosting your self-esteem.

It's likely that after this the depression will go away on its own, giving room for happiness in your life.

it sounds like you are comparing your insides with other people's outsides. just because things look good, doesnt mean they are.

i finally have it all. im not a nut case anymore. how i have longed for that all my life. stability. i have a job i absolutely love, its my passion. i have three great kids that i am no longer responsible for raising, that are doing well on their own, that are providing me with beautiful grandchildren. i have "friends" that seem to genuinely care about me. i have my own place that is easy to care for, with a friendly landlord that keeps the place up very well, i have a good car, people really look up to me and admire me. they tell me all the time how wonderful i am. what a boost to my self esteem.

but am i happy? do i experience joy? i still dont know what those things are. i still struggle allowing all these wonderful things in my life be a part of me. i dont know how to enjoy them. i dont know how to make them a part of me. i havent learned how to connect or experience. life has no meaning still. what i do has meaning, but nothing has meaning tome. But people who look at me think I have it all.

Hmm, maybe you're just not able to experience it? Not saying this is definitely the case, but people with ASPD have similar issues. It also could be something else, but I suggest you look into it, or talk to a professional. Good luck with that!