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I don't understand how I could be so lucky, and have so many things to be thankful for but at the same time still be completely and totally miserable. I always have these break downs and I fail to know what exactly my problem is so I assume I have depression. Actually I am pretty sure I do because not too long ago, like maybe a couple of months back my doctor prescribed me antidepressants which I refused to take. Kind of regretting that. When I get my job I'm investing in a new cell phone, a car, and a psychiatrist. Sounds good. Just have to get my priorities straight I guess. Lord, just please help me. Please.

Hello, thanks for sharing this! If I had seen it sooner I would have definitely responded. I have had depression/anxiety for almost 30 years now and certainly can relate to what you say. What I have learned over time is that depression has a way of making you feel terrible even when things are going "well" in your life. Some of my worst episodes of depression came at a time when life was generally good. I have the type of depression that is mostly chemical, meaning it doesn't really matter what is happening in my life. I am learning to accept that, and it makes me feel less like I "should" be feeling a certain way.

For me I needed lots of therapy which I have done over the years on multiple occasions. But for now I have to be on medication for my illness (depression) or I will become depressed with pretty severe symptoms. I hope you will find a way to try and see that doctor again and think again about the possibility of medication or some form of help. Especially now that you are regretting refusing the meds before.

Good luck to you and if you ever want to talk feel free to message me! Thanks for posting on here forever!