One Person

There exists but one man that makes my body tingle. For the last couple of years, he has been my center, the only thing that shakes me to the core while I happily bathe in giddiness. Just the mere mention of his name makes me whip around to find the source of its uttering. And while this sounds like a good thing and that it might help me cope with depression, it's not. "Why?" you may ask. I'll tell you why, and you may laugh.
That man is Sherlock Holmes.
The famous fictional British detective, who could solve any case. By deductive and inductive reasoning, he could for conclusions nearly dead-on to the truth. He held a strong disdain for Scotland Yard, although in all of the cases he worked with them he only allowed his name to be used for a few.
Holmes is nearly everything I want in a man; intelligent, introverted, and funny. He has a strong passion for several other things I happen to find lovely or amusing. Does he have his faults? Yes, of course, like any other fictional and real human being. He had a small cocaine habit; he would inject a 7% solution when there was no case to occupy his manic mind. He wasn't terribly good looking (although, who gives a damn about that?). Sherlock could be very arrogant and conceited. Plus, he had a strong dislike for women; he felt as though the sex couldn't be trusted and he wanted no romantic relations with any.
I think what hurts the most is that he didn't want a relationship and was incapable of loving somebody in a romantic way. The closest he came was John, but he didn't love John in that way. And, for those who protest using Irene Adler, the story explicitly states that Holmes never loved her, he just had a mad amount of respect for her because she was the only female who bested him. Don't get me started on her, I'm a little jealous, which is ridiculous
God, I love that man so much. I don't even know why these days. It hurts. A lot. And I see no end to this love anywhere in the near future.
Sorry you had to read all of this, this was something that I needed to say right now. I watched my favorite incarnation yesterday (Jeremy Brett )
and by the end I could feel my heartbeat and my face flushing. Sigh. How silly

I can understand how you could be attracted to a fictional person who embodies the qualities you are looking for in a man. One thing about fictional folks: You don't notice their quirks and their imperfections. A real man might have smelly feet and longer toenails that scratch his bed mate, bad breath, BO, throw his clothes on the floor instead of putting them in the hamper, complain about not having any clean clothes, etc.

I hope you are trying to look for a real man, if you'd like. Would it help to seek out some possible faults in your dream man, such as bad breath from smoking a pipe, likely perfectionism, etc.?

Hmm, maybe I better move along before I get into trouble here!

I used to have a crush on a celebrity when I was younger whom I shall not name here. I know how you must be feeling, I was so happy to escape into a fantasy of love. I worry though, does it not also make you unhappy?

It does make me unhappy, and I am sort of looking for a real person. I'm a sophomore in high school though, and in all honesty, I don't feel the need to pursue a relationship right now. It's almost surreal for me to actually like someone, let alone want to be with them.
Sigh. I'll find somebody someday (maybe) but it doesn't change the fact that my current interest is making me upset.

Do you feel too young to have a serious relationship? And do you feel like, whats the point of having one that's not serious?

In my experience of having a fantasy love interest, it felt good sometimes, but ultimately it was very unhealthy for me and led me to self destructive habits.

You already know how it can make you feel unhappy sometimes, I don't want to be such a downer but I feel I should warn you, when I fell in love with a fantasy, it was a downward spiral of loneliness and destruction. Please be careful about how much you indulge in your fantasy.

quote, (I forget who) " we indulge in fantasy because reality is infinitely worse."

personally I have fantasized about a love. after realizing that the fantasy is ALWAYS better than reality.....

I have discovered "There is no such think as love."

please do not make my mistake.......

I'm fifteen, which isn't very young...but age is part of it. Right now doesn't feel like a good time. I'm dealing with a couple mental health issues that I need help with (don't worry, I am getting help!)

My fantasies generally lead to self-destructive behavior, not just the love ones. And this does feel like a downward spiral sometimes

I'm sorry to hear that your fantasies are effecting you negatively but I am also very glad you are getting the help you need.

I don't fantasize about romance anymore but I do fantasize about having a better life or having someone else's life. We're in the same boat kinda. Hopefully these things will pass for both of us eventually and we won't need to live in a fantasy, we'll just be happy with what we've got.