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#1
Apr 30, 2014, 05:48 PM
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I just found out through a counselor that I have
built up anger with my father. I always knew it but I never recognized it until now. I need to forgive him she says but I don't know how I am going to do that. I believe that these pent up feelings and issues have cost me a career that I wanted so bad. I guess I may find out here. |
 IchbinkeinTeufel
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#2
Apr 30, 2014, 06:06 PM
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Hi, Dip. Cool name, by the way.
Yeah, I probably have the same sort of problem, as I most certainly hold certain animosity towards my dad for things in the past, ... I wouldn't say I've gotten past it all, but more that I've just had to get on with it.
__________________
{ Kein Teufel }
Translation: Not a devil [ `id -u` -eq 0 ] || exit 1 |
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#3
Apr 30, 2014, 06:23 PM
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I never thought I could ever forgive my dad, too.....but I finally let go of the burden of carrying all that around. Forgiving is really essential, I think towards moving on. At first, I forgave him for my sake and not his sake. Surprisingly tho, I have also finally been able to forgive for his sake as well. Wherever his soul is right now, I hope it has made him feel better in some way.
I know it is hard to forgive, but be good to yourself and try to allow that into your heart. You will be surprised at how freeing releasing that burden will be. Maybe start out like I did and forgive him for your sake. And when and if the time ever comes, perhaps you can also come to a place where you can forgive for his sake as well. It doesn't mean you have to forget....not at all....but forgiving really does help towards getting to a better place to where you can move on with your life. You deserve that. |
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#4
May 01, 2014, 01:31 PM
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Hi DipDumpling, it sounds like your anger is hurting you much more than him?? And why should you deserve that??!!!
Maybe try to see that whatever he did was for a reason/s, you don't have to agree with the reason/s but, maybe that was all he knew/felt he could do. Now, depending on what he's done, if you can't forgive him (or can't forgive him right now) then I'd say that, that was OK as long as you can work towards not carrying the pain/anger/emotions attached, as long as you can work towards it not effecting your life now/from here on in, as long as you can focus on moving past it and making the future better. And whatever he's done you can be stronger than that, you are a lot more than that!! You don't need to "walk in his shadow", you can free yourself to work on the kind of life you want without him pulling you down. Alison 
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#5
May 01, 2014, 05:42 PM
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Quote:
that anger is hurting you not him...so it needs to be for you you don't have to be golf buddies with him but you gotta help yourself get better
__________________
I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper!  
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