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#1
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What keeps you going when you have no will to live anymore?
I feel lonely all the time whether I'm around people or alone and constantly wonder why I am really here on earth. I've had thoughts about death many times, not so much suicidal ideations, just simply not existing anymore. I would be too afraid to take my own life. It scares me very much. And, I've never tried to take my own life, not once. I just hate the way I feel most of the time and don't know how to deal with the pain sometimes. I pray and ask God for help and strength to deal with my situation. But, what do I really have to live for? I'm just tired of living a majority of the time. I am either not taken seriously by people or just completely ignored and isolated altogether. My own family does not even respect me and that is why I have no real relationship or communication with them much anymore. I simply remove myself from toxic, negative people. And, I am still traumatized from the time my aunt cursed me out and just completely tore me apart and how her and my grandmother just walked away laughing afterwards. I am not a bad person and have never physically or emotionally harmed anyone yet still, I feel like people try to hurt and disrespect me 90% of the time. I don't feel needed, wanted, or truly loved. I don't fit in well when trying to connect with people. Things just haven't been working out for me, no matter how hard I try. I have no interest in therapy, tried it once before and it just made me feel even worse like the therapist was laughing or mocking my pain. I don't get why people can be so mean and insensitive, even family members. I'm just so tired of everything. Not to mention, my mother who is my main support system can be so overbearing and controlling at times, especially when she constantly interrupts or talks over me when I am speaking. And, I try to tell her that I don't like that she does that and why does she keep doing it and she says it is just a bad habit. I just have all these feelings about not knowing where I truly belong or fit to being disrespected. I am really trying to understand myself more and trying to figure out what it is that I am doing wrong that is contributing to my surroundings. |
![]() Anonymous100336, BLUEDOVE
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#2
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May I offer my shoulder for you to lean on for comfort, ears to listen to your problems and laughter when you feel like laughing with someone?
__________________
- - - what goes around, comes around - - - |
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#4
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Thank you. Very kind of you.
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#5
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Please stand UP for dear self,and remove yourself
from toxic people,including family. As for M. 'bad habit' . . . BULL! She's getting jollies out of demeaning you,tell her to be quiet your not finished speaking yet (and say it very LOUD)! Deepest Respect, BLUEDOVE |
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