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  #1  
Old Jan 09, 2015, 02:11 PM
Loutrem Loutrem is offline
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i don't know why but i get really angry for nothing sometimes. and it makes me feel guilty because i usually snap at my friends and then they don't want to talk to me anymore and i feel like ****, and i have to make excuses while when THEY get angry i have to shut up. i don't know how to control this anger, it's here everydays, it only waits for an unwanted comment, a sound or a situation that i don't like and i'll start getting angry and being aggressive towards everyone. the worse is when my family makes fun of me (i'm very sensitive and i hate when people make fun of me), i either cry or snap and they don't care and laugh even more. i dont know what to do?
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  #2  
Old Jan 09, 2015, 07:31 PM
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Crazy Hitch Crazy Hitch is offline
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Hi Loutrem

I'm sorry to hear that you are struggling with some anger issues at the moment.

I don't think it's right that family make fun of someone - you have a right to feel sensitive if you are being made fun of - nobody would want to endure that. Sounds to me they do it to get a reaction. That's nasty. I wonder what would happen if you don't act out a response to their childishness? They shouldn't be doing it in the first place. You can think all sorts of right things in your head about the wrongs that they are doing but walk away gratiously.

Do you have a therapist that you can talk things through with? It always helps to get support.
  #3  
Old Jan 10, 2015, 03:57 PM
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Thunder Bow Thunder Bow is offline
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More about Control here. Family trying to control you with personal insults and laughing at you. Friends trying to control you by not talking to you. They can get angry but you can not. Take control of your own life, anger and all. Best to distance yourself from those kind of controlling people. Some times you have good reason to be angry.
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  #4  
Old Jan 10, 2015, 04:09 PM
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Angelique67 Angelique67 is offline
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This is a good thread for me right now because I'm furious without completely understanding why and it's a problem because it's bleeding over into areas that don't deserve any anger. I hate when I feel this way. I know it will pass in a few days though but right now I'm kind of stuck. I guess if I try to do something physical it might help.
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  #5  
Old Jan 10, 2015, 05:10 PM
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vital vital is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Loutrem View Post
i don't know why but i get really angry for nothing sometimes. and it makes me feel guilty because i usually snap at my friends and then they don't want to talk to me anymore and i feel like ****, and i have to make excuses while when THEY get angry i have to shut up. i don't know how to control this anger, it's here everydays, it only waits for an unwanted comment, a sound or a situation that i don't like and i'll start getting angry and being aggressive towards everyone. the worse is when my family makes fun of me (i'm very sensitive and i hate when people make fun of me), i either cry or snap and they don't care and laugh even more. i dont know what to do?
Hey Loutrem,

I know what's happening! It's not often advertised, but one of the main things that happens when you get depressed it you get hyper hyper sensitive to criticism (and praise). Even the slightest indirect implicit criticism will bother you and come back into your mind again and again and again and again and again, and, thus, the anger. Did I get that right? Have a look at this and see if it describes what's happening to you

http://forums.psychcentral.com/depre...n-escaped.html

Especially see post #74 for what I think is the best overall plan. There are lots of ways to get better and many of these are great for your overall health anyway.

- vital
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Ruftin
Thanks for this!
Ruftin
  #6  
Old Jan 11, 2015, 02:13 AM
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8thstreetbungalow 8thstreetbungalow is offline
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I love thunder bows advice here.
  #7  
Old Jan 13, 2015, 03:41 PM
Loutrem Loutrem is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: France
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Hooligan: ive tried to tell them so many times that it hurts me but all they say is "that was just a joke, relax and laugh" but i can't. and no i don't have a therapist, and i can't anyways, i don't have enough money for that :/

Thunder Bow: yeah id like to leave and make better friends but im stuck right now. i don't want to be alone for the moment so i have to stay with them

vital: well thanks, i didn't know that! i know i have some kind of depression but i didn't know that it could make me angry..
  #8  
Old Jan 15, 2015, 01:52 AM
Loutrem Loutrem is offline
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yesterday again my friends made fun of me.. of my drawings. they wrote stuff like "it's ugly!" on a table where i drew some stuff at school in art class. at first i didn't know it was them, so i passed two hours of art class wanting to punch the person who wrote these stuff because i was so angry, but i also wanted to die, because it was so embarassing and it made me sad. and when i knew it was them i was even more angry but i couldn't let them know. they said "come on, it's a joke, don't take this seriously" ok lol but the fact is that i did and now im angry
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  #9  
Old Jan 15, 2015, 01:57 PM
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Thunder Bow Thunder Bow is offline
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That is just more Bullying. They want to control you, and get you mad at them. Also look at the inverse...they may have actually like your work. If it is one person, talk to your teacher about him or her. Much of this is just immature behavior. If they get mean, then you must take action.
  #10  
Old Jan 15, 2015, 07:30 PM
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vital vital is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Loutrem View Post
yesterday again my friends made fun of me.. of my drawings. they wrote stuff like "it's ugly!" on a table where i drew some stuff at school in art class. at first i didn't know it was them, so i passed two hours of art class wanting to punch the person who wrote these stuff because i was so angry, but i also wanted to die, because it was so embarassing and it made me sad. and when i knew it was them i was even more angry but i couldn't let them know. they said "come on, it's a joke, don't take this seriously" ok lol but the fact is that i did and now im angry
Hi Loutrem,

I very much agree with Thunder Bow that this is bullying. There is a very horrible but strong instinct in both people and animals to attack anyone who shows weakness or fear. I know it's very upsetting, and their behavior is repulsive, but the very object of your strong, justified emotions may be misdirecting you away from what I suspect is the essential problem. I think you're having compulsive feelings of fear and anger and sadness caused by the underlying process explained in my previous link.

What I mean is, I don't think you have to pay much attention to the bullying (other than practical steps if things get out of hand). It's not important. What's important is getting yourself un-depressed. I think if you can manage to do that, I believe that other problems will disappear.

- vital
  #11  
Old Jan 15, 2015, 09:43 PM
cool09 cool09 is offline
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Location: Eastern MD
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I would see a psychiatrist to find out if there is a serious problem. My anger pops up out of nowhere and goes from 0-60 in a millisecond and interferes very much with my thought process. The sight of someone or something can bring up anger in me (which I could never explain). And when I'm angry all of the issues I've had in the past with relationships floods my mind and are intrusive. Quick anger can be a defense mechanism and/or tied to other issues like trauma. I would talk to someone about it.

Last edited by cool09; Jan 15, 2015 at 09:45 PM. Reason: add
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