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  #1  
Old Jan 26, 2015, 10:33 PM
Teacup381 Teacup381 is offline
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Location: Canada
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I find that sometimes I get so overwhelmed with my anxiety and anger and sadness, that I end up taking it out on my husband. I'll be grumpy and short to him. I've yelled at him a few times. I'll push him away when he asks me to tell him how I feel. It hurts him so much and I feel so terrible when it happens. I don't mean to push him away or make him feel bad, I just can't control myself sometimes. He's the only person I trust wholeheartedly and the only person who knows about all of issues, besides my doctor. I don't always want to burden him with my emotions and problems.

I hope I can learn to deal with all of these different emotions I have, for both myself and for him because I know how hard it must be on him
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  #2  
Old Jan 26, 2015, 10:51 PM
Anonymous100305
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I pretty-much just keep to myself... no extended family, no friends. However I am married. When I'm really depressed & / or angry about something, I just feel this overwhelming need to be alone. If my wife tries to comfort me, I will sometimes become irate. She wants to comfort me & does not understand my overwhelming need to be left alone. It can become a "dicey" situation. I don't have any solutions for it. The fact that I am now aware of the problem helps.
Thanks for this!
Teacup381
  #3  
Old Jan 29, 2015, 05:24 PM
Anonymous100163
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I came to this section of the site ready to start a thread about dealing with anger. I saw the title with irritable in it and knew this was where I needed to be. Thank You for sharing.

I snapped at my husband yesterday. He said something that pissed me off and before I knew it I was yelling.... "FINE!!!! You do it then," while I threw a fork in his direction. I immediately felt guilty as he too is a very good man. I was reminded of him when reading you describe your husband.

I immediately wondered why I snapped and what the heck was wrong with me. I hadn't been feeling "right" all day. He said the wrong thing at the wrong time and SLAM!!!!

I guess what I am trying to say is.... You are not alone. I know exactly how you are feeling.
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Teacup381
  #4  
Old Jan 29, 2015, 06:16 PM
avlady avlady is offline
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I get like that a few times a year, a bit edgy everyday from waiting for him to come home from work, its an hour there and back for his ride into work. i basically take care of the house all day, i can't seem to keep up with all the housework. i love it when he gets home and then i can relax. i used to teach piano in the day but housework is too hard to keep up with people, strangers coming over for lessons.
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Teacup381
  #5  
Old Jan 29, 2015, 10:04 PM
Teacup381 Teacup381 is offline
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Location: Canada
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Quote:
Originally Posted by emwell2 View Post

I came to this section of the site ready to start a thread about dealing with anger. I saw the title with irritable in it and knew this was where I needed to be. Thank You for sharing.

I snapped at my husband yesterday. He said something that pissed me off and before I knew it I was yelling.... "FINE!!!! You do it then," while I threw a fork in his direction. I immediately felt guilty as he too is a very good man. I was reminded of him when reading you describe your husband.

I immediately wondered why I snapped and what the heck was wrong with me. I hadn't been feeling "right" all day. He said the wrong thing at the wrong time and SLAM!!!!

I guess what I am trying to say is.... You are not alone. I know exactly how you are feeling.
It's good to know I'm not alone. It happened again yesterday. I came home from registering at school and I had a migraine from the night before and I felt really overwhelmed and I was screaming and threw my phone on the ground. I feel terrible for acting like that in hindsight but it's so hard sometimes. He treats me so well and is so patient but I have so much anxiety and frustration from not being able to go to any therapy yet and I've been having nightmares and a flashback recently.
  #6  
Old Jan 30, 2015, 12:38 AM
Anonymous100305
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My wife & I were having difficulty changing the water filter in our frig today. We had taken the old filter out. Water was pouring out all over the place. (The directions didn't say we needed to turn off the water. We assumed it shut off automatically. It didn't.) She got in my way. I told her to: "get out of my way!"
Thanks for this!
Teacup381
  #7  
Old Jan 30, 2015, 07:27 AM
mommyto3furballs mommyto3furballs is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2015
Location: Ontario
Posts: 63
yes definitely I'm going through anger/irritability issues. so is my husband at the anger end. all we seem to do is fight. the point is, I guess no one is alone in feeling this way which makes me feel better but I would like it to stop for me
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Teacup381
  #8  
Old Jan 30, 2015, 06:35 PM
PianogirlPlays PianogirlPlays is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 728
I struggle almost every day with emotions especially in regard to my husband. I want him here or I don't . I want his support but fuss at imperfections. He makes mistakes and so do I but we are fortunately still trying. Oh to gain control of thoughts and emotions.
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Teacup381
  #9  
Old Jan 30, 2015, 07:14 PM
peacelizard peacelizard is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 257
My anger tends to come out either when I'm overwhelmed with anxiety and feel trapped - you know, kinda like a cornered animal - or when I'm vulnerable and have a difficult time expressing myself.

My therapist recommended a book called The Anger Trap. I think it's pretty good. It's shown me things that I've always "known" but need to be more mindful of.

I think it'd be good to read the book a few times as I feel like you don't get the full benefit in one go through.
Thanks for this!
Teacup381
  #10  
Old Jan 30, 2015, 07:57 PM
Anonymous100163
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Thanks for the book recommendation. I looked for more information on it and found it just might be right for me. While looking at that book, I also found....
The Anger Workbook: An Interactive Guide to Anger Management
by Les Carter (Author), Dr. Frank Minirth (Author)
This just might come in handy as well.
Thanks for this!
Teacup381
  #11  
Old Jan 30, 2015, 11:12 PM
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meganb22 meganb22 is offline
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I know how you feel. I get so angry sometimes, that I even pick a fight just so I can get the anger out. I usually blow up at my family and I feel crappy when I do it, and usually apologize afterwards and tell them that it's bipolar and not them.
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http://memyselfandbipolar.weebly.com/
Thanks for this!
Teacup381
  #12  
Old Jan 31, 2015, 11:04 AM
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vital vital is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: Boston
Posts: 1,589
Quote:
Originally Posted by Teacup381 View Post
I find that sometimes I get so overwhelmed with my anxiety and anger and sadness, that I end up taking it out on my husband. I'll be grumpy and short to him. I've yelled at him a few times. I'll push him away when he asks me to tell him how I feel. It hurts him so much and I feel so terrible when it happens. I don't mean to push him away or make him feel bad, I just can't control myself sometimes. He's the only person I trust wholeheartedly and the only person who knows about all of issues, besides my doctor. I don't always want to burden him with my emotions and problems.

I hope I can learn to deal with all of these different emotions I have, for both myself and for him because I know how hard it must be on him
Hey Teacup,

It sounds like your hubby is pretty understanding, and it's such a precious thing to have someone you totally trust. Maybe just talk to him and explain what's going on as you did here?

I'm not sure if everyone would agree, but I really think that being irritable or angry all the time is usually a symptom of depression. If you can find a way to become un-depressed, the anger and irritation will go too.

- vital
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Teacup381
Thanks for this!
Teacup381
  #13  
Old Jan 31, 2015, 11:59 PM
Teacup381 Teacup381 is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by vital View Post
Hey Teacup,

It sounds like your hubby is pretty understanding, and it's such a precious thing to have someone you totally trust. Maybe just talk to him and explain what's going on as you did here?

I'm not sure if everyone would agree, but I really think that being irritable or angry all the time is usually a symptom of depression. If you can find a way to become un-depressed, the anger and irritation will go too.

- vital
He is so understanding and I'm so grateful. I tell him how I feel most of the time but I don't always feel like talking and I told him that and he seems to understand but it's still hard on him understandably. I'm waiting to get into some therapy. The places te doctor recommended either have extremely long wait lists or aren't getting back to me so it's been hard. I'm gonna go back to the doctor in the next week or so and try to figure out another option.

Thanks! And peace lizard, thank you for the book recommendation! I'll be sure to look into it.
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