[Chocopiano27]

Hi i'm sort of new here. I'm a girl that is quite different i say. My friends are mostly guys and they even think that i'm 'one of the guys.'

Right now i have a very difficult peer pressure problem. I really can't cope up with my feeling when i'm near popular girls. It's not that i'm the loser girl everyone hate, it's just that i really feel awkward and weird when i'm near them. As if i must do something to impress them, and i must be their friend or something. I don't want them to think that i'm boring.

I'm an extrovert, laughing, talking out loud, being silly, making friends and stuff are my thing. But when i'm with them i look like a coward, weird girl that i'm not.

I really wanna be myself and be fun like who i really am.. But it's really hard to be that way.. i guess i just can't stop wanting to be popular too. Ridiculously i also want to be seen 'popular'. They have a free high self esteem and i just want that so badly. I don't wanna be a negative person.

I wanna be positive. And not care what other people think of me.

Does meditating help? I wanna try!

[sideblinded]

Chocopiano27, Hello and welcome to PC. I think you have a great attitude in that you want to better how you are dealing with your emotions. Kudos to you! It is hard in school when there are cliques and so much peer pressure. Being a teen is difficult in itself.

I want to be positive, too. I do read books on meditation. One is called "Wherever You Go There You Are" It is by Jon Kabat-Zinn. It is about mindfulness meditation. It is about living in the moment. Also some great books are by Eckert Tolle.

There are all sorts of meditation. You may want to post in this forum as well. It is a social group that you can join.

http://forums.psychcentral.com/mindfulness-meditation/

This one is a forum that may help.

Steps to Better Self-Esteem - Forums at Psych Central

Best wishes and I hope that this helps. ((hugs))

[striking]

Why do you think you look like a coward or weird?

Ask yourself, would rather be popular with everyone, or be special for the people that care about you and you care about?

BTW, because you perceive someone as popular does not mean they have high self-esteem. Comparing yourself to your belief of what perfection is, is a losing proposition because very often you will fall far short in doing so.